Taking The Scenic Route to a BFP - Winter/Spring 2013 Edition - Page 15

[MsDolphin]

Indie - sending you lots of positive energy for tomorrow.

[toothfairy2be]

Indie- thinking if you! Hope your IUI goes smoothly & baby indie starts making its way down! I love the massage stuff, where do ou o for something like that?

[bebelove]

Thinking of you, Indie!!!

[SKJ2011]

Hope you're IUI went well today indie!!!

[indie1976]

thanks for all the well wishes, friends. i just love this group SO much. 

so, good and bad news. bad news: dh's sample was the worst ever. not so bad that we had to cancel, but pretty grim on all accounts. i asked Dr. P if it was because we had just bd'd the night before last (side note: i'm always having to catch myself from using internet abbreviations IRL, i almost actually said bd) and she said no that wouldn't do it, and then she asked if he had had the flu recently and he did, over christmas. she said that was the likely culprit. ugh. i didn't even think about the flu having that kind of an effect. ah well. it is what it is.

the good news. i'm still in love with Dr. P! when she came in to do the IUI i told her that i hadn't gotten the results of my blood work back and instead of just having her nurse tell me, she had us go to a consult room after the IUI and wait for her to have a break between patients and she sat down with us and talked through them and through next steps should this cycle not work. let me emphasize once again I. LOVE. HER. everything came back pretty great. my amh is .44 which is higher than my "less than .16" but still super low and matches my AFC. but my fsh and E2 were GREAT. fsh was 10.8 last time, this time it was 7.5 with my E2 unchanged (it was 40 something, so in the good range and not artificially suppressing my fsh). all my other stuff came back fine, too (fasting glucose, tsh, etc). so i asked her what's next. dh piped in and said that i was being pessimistic and expecting this cycle not to work. i told him he could be optimistic, i needed to plan. the doc said No! YOU have to be optimistic, it's YOUR uterus! i thought that was funny. anyway, i asked about only having one follicle and if we should go straight to IVF or try something else IUI-wise to get more follicles and she said that she had hoped that we would have had two follicles this time and that she would like to do a cycle with straight injectables to see how i would respond in preparation for IVF. she said it's tricky because she doesn't want to go all out with IUI and get us in a predicament where i have too many follicles but at the same time she still is a little hesitant about IVF because she knows she won't get a large number of eggs from me. i appreciate so much her walking me through her thought process and at the same time it doesn't surprise me because it pretty much matches what i read all over the place. 

so, it looks like if we don't have our miracle this cycle then more drugs next cycle and pray pray pray for more than one follie. but i will do my best to not assume the worst for this one :)

thanks again for everyone's support!!

oh, the massage... it was QGM therapy that was added to the massage. you can google it if you want. and, Sila, yes, I do believe I was diagnosed as Qi deficient when I was going to acupuncture... I need to do more research in the acupressure massage (tui na i think it's called?) i love massages so much and i think i'd prefer that over laying still with needles :)

[jpack]

indie I'm so happy for you about the doc, and glad that you were made aware of the problem with dh's sperm, and glad you have an easy explanation rather than a long- term problem. And, its great you didn't have to cancel the iui. I think you have a great reason to be optimistic!

[TenzinsMama]

Indie, I love your doctor, too!  She sounds so wonderful-- taking the time to spend going over things with you like that, offering you such optimism. Seems like she is really trying hard to get that baby for you, without being pushy and alarmist. If you need to take further steps, then it will be just that-- steps-- and you are in partnership with her throughout the process. But I'm hoping that you won't need to go beyond this!!! I want to ask about the straight injectibles-- how is that different from what did you do this time, did you do Clomid/IUI with trigger? I'm with jpack, you have good reason to be optimistic.

[chuord]

Hi ladies - hugs and happiness all around.. Lol
On phone - cant type much as hand sore (RSI - lol falling apart!)
Indie - glad all went well, I agree Doc sounds awesome!
Here's a distraction for you - have you been to the 'thinkgeek' website? (saw the star trek badge for dh) we just got a sonic screwdriver universal remote lol! Nerd alert! Night all must rest arm

[toothfairy2be]

indie- Your doctor sounds seriously wonderful. It is so nice that she takes time to be there for your procedures and to explain things and answer your questions. There is still tons of hope for you this cycle because the medications should improve egg quality so even with only one it is a good strong egg. Hope you are relaxing and taking it easy. I had a tui na massage at our local reflexology massage place. It was amazing but I find there that they don't work on specifics, just a generic either full body (tui na) or foot reflexology. Everyone speaks chinese so they don't really ask a medical history or if there is anything specific you want them to work on. Don't get me wrong, it feels like someone their hands know what parts have kinks to work out so I'm sure they are clearing out whatever is blocked in there! Super crappy about DH sperm and the Flu. How long do they think it will take for them to be 100% again? That gives you peace of mind that doing the IUI was the right choice! Also, yay for your AMH going up (every little bit counts!). Wanted to add, there are many times I almost use internet MDC lingo in real life, BFP, BD... haha- lightens the mood in your head anyway!

Sila- Sorry you have been feeling down, you know we are always here for support and advice even when you're having a bad day (week/month etc). Husbands are seriously a funny breed of human. The insensitivity isn't really intentional but I think just not living infertility every hour of every day it doesn't have the same effect as it does on us. The financial part really is very scary, all your 'eggs' in one basket. This will be your first injecatable IUI right, the other ones were on Clomid? It just seems like if your body can conceive (which it has shown it can) maybe the eggs just weren't right with clomid and injectables are going to give you a better opportunity for a baby that fertilizes and sticks. I am so hopeful for you that your babe is coming but can understand wanting to be realistic at the same time. Has the pink color gone away? They say that can happen if you are having a good estrogen peak before O (for me it always meant my cysts were bleeding but, ya know.. science...)  It isn't just your ego saying you are super healthy, I see your posts, you ARE super healthy. I think it is good that you are continuing acupuncture and hope for progress there. Your DH is right, it could happen naturally and just because you want to try something to improve your eggs doesn't mean you don't have faith it could happen, it just means with the evidence you have about your hormones you want to give yourself the best chance at success. 

 

SKJ- It is so weird, I still dream boy but for some reason as soon as they put it back and when I got that first positive test I started feeling girl. It seriously doesn't matter either way and we aren't finding out so it is going to be a long 9 mos. I'd be perfectly content with a lazy slow growing boy! When do you start your natural cycle monitoring? Anxious to hear how things turn out and what your amazing doctors recommendations are.

Tenzin- With IVF it is possible to get follicles that did not show on AFC. With IUI stims you only want 3-4 good contenders at most because of too high a risk of multiples if you exceed that so the chance of needing more follicles than what they see on an AFC is unlikely. They never told me what my AFC was so I can't compare to my IVF results but even with 12 eggs only 6 were mature. Just remember you only need 1 good one!

MsD- So sorry about AF showing. I'm a little late to the game on this one and I apologize for that. Getting AF after a promising cycle really sucks hard and I'm sorry you have to experience this. Sending hugs and comfort your way.

chourd- It is so funny that you are always posting about sleeping right when I wake up! Hope you got good rest and have an exciting day ahead of you while I'm sleeping tonight!

Pokey- Thank you for chiming in & for your advice. It helps to hear other people had similar experience and turned out fine!  Thanks for following along with us too! I feel like you are a big sister making sure nobody picks on us! You are a moderator now, right?

Chrissy- Sarcasm is sometimes the best defense mechanism. I'm sorry that these losses keep happening to you & don't know how you keep a positive attitude through everything. Especially seeing how many losses you had before your son was born. You're an amazing woman.

bebe & gtree- Thanks for coming by and for your support. I try to remember early in your pregnancies how things were and reassure myself that there is just no way to know and just to take things day by day. I hope you will update us with pictures on GG soon! I know someone asked about gtree but for both of you-- any names picked out?

jpack- It is sweet that your DD was hoping you didn't get bad news. Kids are so intuitive. Hope you are doing well and enjoy the long weekend! Go Pats! I'll be in super early again on Tuesday so I'll probably miss you but I'll be waiting to hear your results. Good vibes being sent for a growing healthy baby. I think the progesterone is a good idea especially at this point. Do you have enough refills to get you through 10 weeks?

AFM- I promised eventually I'd come back for personals. Seriously had to track back 3 pages to make sure I got everyone. We are still hanging in over here. Unfortunately I don't get the holiday off tomorrow but working should keep me distracted from the upcoming bloodwork. My nurse/doctor didn't seem concerned about my progesterone, I think because being on Crinone and the absorption that way. Really relieved they didn't recommend I switch to PIO... one thing I would dread is daily shots in the butt. Symptom wise I wake up starving but nothing seems good to eat. Basically all day nothing seems appetizing but once I start eating I can eat just fine (except for the peanut butter sandwich I tried to eat yesterday- that went in the trash bin!). Still slightly crampy from time to time, gassy (TMI, sorry) after eating, and my boobs are immensely sore by the end of the day and when I wake up. Trying to stay hydrated and well fed. Talking to the poppy seed constantly so it knows how badly we want it to stay and grow with us and how happy we are of it's progress so far. Ugh, DH fell asleep on my legs while I was typing and I have to pee so badly I could explode... 

[chuord]

Morning lol!
Wow TF - thanks for taking the time to catch up on all those personals... It must've taken ages 😃..
I have to say that the general 'tone' of your mind seems so calm, nurturing and earth motherly. It is a delight to hear that you are so natural with it. 😃😃😃😃
Indie - hope you don't mind, I did energy work with you last night, also your egg and dh swimmers lol! Hope you have a fan nights sleep, with happy dreams!
Jpack - still holding out hope for yours being a sticky one... And looking forward to the next beta. (lol something came up about his work and dh was starting to explain beta and hcg to me! I set him straight that I knew and how - men! I mean lots of poas the last month, chatting here, two early early losses all of which he knew lol -sorry bout the rant... Men!)
Chrissy, sila, SKJ and msD - big hugs, I know you have all been through your own low period recently, and despite this you find the energy to be supportive and helpful - its soo encouraging and endearing ☺ btw without rambling about the energy work - please just know that I do everyone on this chat - whenever they need it.

Afm - I seem to be a week from O, and am generally feeling very happy and upbeat in myself, which I'm surprised about considering the last two months. I think I must be one of those people that give every egg it's best shot at a pregnancy - so I'm likely to get a higher amount of losses, and I've made peace with it. Lol as I have no expectations for this month I'm trying to lose a few kilos, and get fit...

[TenzinsMama]

TF, I loved reading your pregnancy symptoms!  Very strong ones... I remember vividly, all the gas!  tee hee. It gets better. My clinic goes with Crinone, I wouldn't like to do PIO shots in the butt. I won't be able to give myself the IUI injectibles... well, I would if I had to, but I don't because DH is a paramdedic. He can stick me! We found out the gender with my first baby, and with my second we didn't. DH and I much prefer the surprise at the end. Sure, there were times when we were really curious, but oh my goodness, that suprise at the end was amazing. Thanks for the info about the follicles. I think I was reading in my clinic's literature that with IUI injectibles they hope to stimulate 3-4 eggs, whereas with Clomid it is usually one but on occasion it ends up being two (I migh... I guess my doc isn't worried about OHSS because I'm older so I wouldn't respond too crazily to the drugs. Last week when I saw her to discuss things, she told me that one of the benefits of not having to trigger a woman is that it doesn't require them to make a judgement call about the follicle/egg's readiness to be released. And that level of readiness can really impact whether it's going to be fertilized. Apparently not all women's readiness occurs at the same follicle size... so it's actually better if the woman releases the egg on her own. So then I started wondering, why then do so many docs do the trigger as part of the protocol? I didn't think of asking that question until I got home... Am I missing something?

We did the last bit of the pre-req bloodwork a couple days ago, the stuff that both hubby and I are supposed to do (Hep test, etc.) I remember us doing those tests when we signed up for IVF. Made me wonder if we had to do it now because they sometimes have to convert injectible IUI to IVF... I don't know what we would do if that is the situation we were facing. Ha ha, I did mine right after the appointment with the RE. I drove to the lab, found there wasn't any wait time (it was 1/2 hour before closing, and it was an unusually slow day for them), so I phoned DH and told him that as soon as I pulled into the driveway that he had to get in his car and go to the lab ASAP (kids were still napping, so we had to switch out). Since he hadn't come to the appointment with me, he didn't know what was going down, I just said, "Go get your blood drawn, ask questions later. Trust me on this". Thankfully he was on board, not just with getting the bloodwork done but also with going ahead with IUI injectible!  We just have to decide what cycle we will go ahead with it all. The RE is okay with me using my unopened leftover Gonal F, and it's not expired so we don't have to rush for that reason... I don't want to leave things much longer, but on the other hand if we do it sooner rather than later, and it is successful, that I would have a baby smack dab in the middle of my semester. That would be complicated in that way... A bfp in August would avoid all that... But I don't want to wait until August! It would be great if it happened naturally, and I didn't have to make any decisions. Argh!

P.S. I really need to find some time so that I can go back a few pages and learn about everyone's path!

[indie1976]

happy sunday, y'all!

toothfairy - i am so excited to finally see a ticker at the bottom of your post! how surreal! it makes me so, so happy! thanks for the reminder that i am working with a stronger egg than usual... that does help me to keep from writing this cycle off completely. not sure about how long it will take for dh's swimmers to recover... hoping it's not too long! i love all of your symptoms! you know, i think we all kinda freaked about your progesterone without thinking about how it's a totally different game with IVF... (except i think skj figured that one out pretty quickly). i can see the future and before long we will be chatting about plans for your home birth! eeek!

chuord - we love thinkgeek! haha that's awesome that you guys order from there, too! and, please, i will greedily accept any and all of your energy work!! you are so wonderfully supportive and i hope that you have something cookin' in that uterus of yours! that was hilarious about your husband... i have a new gem to report from my dh... as we were walking into the RE's office for the IUI I mention that I can feel that I had ovulated when we left home. he says... "you can't feel that". so then we start to (playfully) argue about how little he knows about the female body and he says something like he knows more than me and as just as we open the door to the office i tell him that i'm going to punch him in the face... all the front desk staff heard me. it was hilarious. they told me to go ahead and do it. 

jpack - thank you for your support! how are you feeling?? 

tenzin - thanks for your support as well! this past cycle i did letrozole (femara) and a very low dose of fsh (75iu on days 5 & 7). the same protocol can be used with clomid as well. the idea is that you can get away with less fsh (which can be so costly) by combining it with letrozole or clomid. my RE doesn't want to put me back on clomid because my lining wasn't so great on it so this time she is going to up the dosage of fsh to try to make more eggs. letrozole is notorious for only producing one egg but it is much better for your lining than clomid. hope that explains things well enough? i'm happy to answer any other questions... what are your next steps? forgive me if missed them in all the activity on here...

afm - started the vaginal progesterone today. eww. i'm trying to think of the positive aspects of this cycle and not dwell on the one follie and sad sperm issue... we got two bds in besides the iui (one the night of trigger and the other the night of IUI), i hopefully have a nice strong egg, my lining should have been nice and thick by O, i ovulated from my right so maybe that's where the lucky eggs are... and if it all fails then at least i have a plan for the next cycle... so far so good :) hope everyone had a great weekend!

[chuord]

Indie - lol and more lol! I think the conversation with dh was hilarious! My dh is definitely not the most tuned in... Ob and gyn were his least favourite pracs lol - I think he tunes it out on purpose! But then he is one big contradiction in general - doesn't believe in any 'natural therapies' but won't live in a house with a bad feel or if someone has died there... Ok ramble finished... Thanks for the happy baby wishes, still a week to O, but I'm not banking on this month, I kind of feel uninspired to try lol... Maybe I need a rest after the last two months 😜
Can't wait to see who the two graduates will be this month, I have a good feel about you indie... But who will be the other....

[toothfairy2be]

Tenzin- Alright, here goes what I understand of the process. Trigger shot is mostly used with IUI to ensure it is timed correctly. The HCG that is used as the trigger matures the eggs over 36 hours before you ovulate. I guess that is what the goal is. Also they check for the start of your LH surge for when they recommend the trigger. I think when you have multiple eggs the trigger shot ensures that they all ovulate instead of just the healthiest of the group, which is your bodies natural response. Or like jpack who it seems for some reason was creating cysts instead of ovulating, the trigger actually forced her body to ovulate (yay!). As far as repeating bloodwork, we had to do all that genetic and STD testing for any fertility treatment (even just clomid + timed intercourse), just protocol I think. They update it yearly so that is probably why you had to do it again now. I'm excited for you to get started & yay for using left-over drugs so you don't have to buy more!

Indie- Seriously, my husband says ish like that all the time. He seriously thinks I'm joking when I say if he makes me clean the smelly dishes I will throw up or that I am tired and need to go to bed earlier. Like I don't know my body better than he does and I am faking about pregnancy symptoms. Ugh. Men. They just don't have anything internal that they need to pay attention to ever to possibly understand. I'm frequently threatening a kick in the knee... btw, he did the dishes. So there!

[jpack]

indie I'm super optimistic about this cycle for you. That's all I'm gonna say...

chuord thanks for the positive thoughts, good luck with o, glad you're feeling good!

Tenzin at first with clomid, I was like, why trigger when opks work just fine for me? But then I did some research and it looks like there's this problem out there called luteinized unruptured follicle where the follicle gets the dose of lh but doesn't pop. Clomid, it appears, causes a higher incident of this LUF. It fit when I had evidence of a cyst on CD 3 u/s. When I asked my RE about it, she totally shot me down. But she did recognize she had mistakenly not given me a trigger earlier and had me trigger this cycle. As to the timing, thats so interesting what your RE said. I just triggered when i saw the beginning of my LH surge. So that's my experience/suggestion for why trigger on a clomid cycle. I think it's less of a worry with other stims, and I think there are other benefits like TF said in favor of a trigger. Anyway, I hope that's helpful- I'm also really weird will probably some really whacked stuff going on hormone/ovary/uterus wise so ya know, take it all with the grain of salt!

TF so glad you're busy tomorrow. I'm gonna try to stay that way too. I hate the symptom spotting bit because I feel like they come and go, but then again I'm about to go to sleep and it's 9:30, so...

afm I'm kinda having a hard time with the limbo, but I do feel like I'm keeping it in check. I dreamt last night that I started spotting. Between that and the absence of any dreams with babies in them, I'm not feeling to optimistic. But then again, what can I go off? I dreamt about babies with both the last two miscarriages so maybe my subconscious really knows nothing at all!

As much as I'm hoping the progesterone doesn't draw out the inevitable if that's the case, I am glad I started it after reading about the role progesterone plays in protecting the fetus from the immune system (T-1 cells, or something). So anyway hope it's helpful. Thank you so much to everyone that shared their perspective with me on that!

If I knew this one was a gonner, I'd use my free Starbucks drink on a triple venti something, I'd load up on echinacea and umcka to ward off dd's virus, and I'd delve into the nice bottle of hard cider that has been on my counter since the holiday party. There. Now that I've said them, maybe I'll be less bugged. I guess I'll wait 48 hours to indulge... (or not). I hope everyone is having a great (long if you get it) weekend!

[chuord]

Jpack - isn't it amazing that the visualization of the binge is almost as good as the binge? Lol no wait normally I envisage it, obsess thinking about it and crack and eat it lol! Wishing you more strength of character than that! I'm not sure if it helps at all, but I can still find a 'baby' to tune into with the energy - I wouldn't lose hope yet.

Hugs for the limbo time, and hoping you don't catch that cold!

[indie1976]

toothfairy and jpack - thinking of you both!!! Beta today for both of you, right?! Hoping it's your last one!

jpack - i love your binge fantasy as well... hoping you have to delay that fantasy for 9 months or so!

toothfairy - you should totally kick your dh in the knee! men! it's true though, they have no concept of body awareness, especially on a monthly basis. they all seem to think that we make stuff up and it's all in our heads. if only we could make them switch places so they could understand because they aren't the best at putting themselves in our shoes. they have to experience something before they will believe it... i'm so happy that dirty dishes make you want to puke! (you know what i mean!)

chuord - i misunderstood your previous post... i thought you were a week PAST ovulation... oops. so now my wish is for you to have a super strong O!

[toothfairy2be]

Indie- no beta til tomorrow, right in time for another snowstorm!

Jpack- omg if I'm supposed to be having happy baby dreams I'm def not pregnant! I've had the most effed up dreams ever in the past 3 days. Seriously screwed up in a way I cant even share! Keep the faith & hands off the hard cider.

I feel legit crappy today. Got some acid issues going on so eating sucks & it is giving me the worst stomach issues. I tried tums but no luck. I'm happy of course but dear Lord in Heaven give me some relief!

[SKJ2011]

Hi Ladies. Sorry i've been MIA. it's really hard to get on the computer for enough time on the weekends. I'll do my best to catch up.

TF - Glad you are having symptoms, but sorry you are feeling so crappy. All your symptoms sound really promising though, and I think they sound very progesterone related! Funny that you feel like it's a girl now. Either way, baby fairy is going to be amazing. Good luck tomorrow. I hope you beta is nice and high and you aren't feeling any more uncertainty about this. Thanks for the info on the trigger. I really feel like the trigger will help my natural cycle.

jpack - I'm so sorry you are in limbo. It really sucks. I had similar bleeding dreams with one of my losses, but not the others, so I decided that dreams don't mean anything. I wish we could fast forward to Tuesday and I hope, hope, hope you get great news and are done with betas.

chuord - you are so awesome. I'm so glad you joined us on this thread. Good luck with O. I hope this is your month

Indie - I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your doctor! I think she is EXACTLY what you needed. I'm just so sure things are going to work out. She just sounds so awesome. Hooray! And, I'm hopeful for you this month b/c MFI is the whole reason IUI is helpful. So, it sounds like maybe IUI is all you guys really needed. I hope these two weeks fly by and you are another one of our graduates! Isn't vaginal progesterone so fun If you need any crinone, let me know. I've got a TON and the new doc is all about the oral prometrium. Not sure whey.

Got to run. will be back soon to finish up...

[indie1976]

TF - ah, tomorrow is the beta. good luck with the impending snow storm! i have no clue what it is like to live in the snow! i'm sorry you feel crappy. acid issues are no bueno. wouldn't it be great to fast forward to the 2nd trimester?

SKJ - thanks for linking MFI/IUI ... wouldn't that be amazing if that was what did the trick? i'm curious why your RE is all about oral prometrium. my RE prescribed a low dose orally last cycle but this cycle doubled the dosage and instructed me to take it vaginally twice a day... the only difference that i can think of is that last cycle was a natural cycle and this one medicated... anyway, i'm always curious about the "why". looking forward to hearing about your appt tomorrow! i swear i feel like it's my appointment... i want to know EVERYTHING you learn from her.

Chrissy, Shell, Ms. D - how are you lovely ladies doing? Shell, I thought you were going to come back and tell us a story?? :)

AFM - i'm at the computer all week which means all i want to do is procrastinate on mdc! so i'm hoping *someone* will keep me entertained on here! :) i'm starting to feel progesterone-y... uterus feels a bit heavier and ever so slightly crampy... i'm glad it is happening now at 2dpiui so i don't confuse this with pregnancy symptoms! question for you progesterone ladies - did it ever make you sleepy? or is that all in my head? i feel so tired and i'm wondering if it's due to the higher dose/taking it vaginally/taking one of the doses in the morning. or maybe my sleepiness has nothing to do with it.