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Taking The Scenic Route to a BFP - Winter/Spring 2013 Edition - Page 50post #981 of 15193/29/13 at 4:51pmpost #982 of 15193/29/13 at 5:17pmpost #983 of 15193/29/13 at 5:28pmpost #984 of 15193/29/13 at 5:49pmpost #985 of 15193/29/13 at 6:00pmCd 27
Bd on cd 13 & 15
On tuesday morning i felt crampy and had a major mood swing during which a texted dh that he didn't love me... etc. Haha....like the good old Clomid days
Once last night and this am....dizzy inducing hotflashes. I was thinking menopause....
I wasn't paying attention....i had to have a pittsburgh steak salad and chocolate on tuesday.....or i was gonna die!! Pms right??? Ummmm
No nausea. No breast tenderness...some insomnia.
Of course right now i feel like i'm gonna throw up...but jeeze...i think thats emotional...
Sorry to jump back in this way! All you newbies i haven't even back read...i am sitting on my bed with a grouchy teething drooling baby trying to do this on my phone. So just hi everyone!post #986 of 15193/29/13 at 8:18pmpost #987 of 15193/29/13 at 8:18pmThread Starter
Wow Sherry! Such exciting news!
TF- It can be so rough when there is a boom of bfps. Thinking of you. I don't really know what else to say other than I have felt everything you have described. I've been there and so have many others that are here. We're here for you. I'm glad my package made it! My beads are simple but I loved them. I also realized I probably didn't need to mail my beads for myself to you...doh. Just mail me back a little baggie when you mail the rest :)
Night.post #988 of 15193/29/13 at 8:21pmpost #989 of 15193/30/13 at 3:05amHi ladies
Sila and skj congrats!!!"
Indie happy belated birthday
Tf...oh. i am sorry things are feeling so rough...i feel like a jerk. I didn't read first. Xanax has its place...anxiety is awful. I hope you enjoy your mom and can relax and be distracted. My trick....think about how sorry you would feel if coworker lost the pregnancy and then try to be glad she isn't... i am not sure that makes sense but somehow it works for me...when i would like to throttle someone....
Hi everyone else.
Well i finally got dh past shock and speaking coherently...we have a trip to Vegas Tuesday-Sunday....um it was part of our first steps to enjoying our adult babyless future....um so anyway...we wont do any quants till after we get back if it's still holding. Its so against the odds. U/S if quants get to 2000...and hope its not ectopic... nothing too reassuring as we look at the hard truth. edc dec 8.i will be 42 him 48 by then. His paßt month of financial and future pplanning is out the window....life sometimes happens when you are making other plans...never truer to us than now.
Thanks to you all for the congrats....i cant imagine being stuck out here with noone to tell.post #990 of 15193/30/13 at 4:19ampost #991 of 15193/30/13 at 8:40amOn my phone...
sila- nice coincidence with the dentist! And, VERY interesting abt the betas and twins!! Can't wait to find out.
chuord-what you made for your dad is amazing!!! Awesome work!
tf-your experience is so similar too w after my first loss. It was like I finally felt things were looking up and Bam! I'd be sobbing again. The emotions of a loss are so tough and having pg women around you is like a cruel joke. You are an amazing person and handling this with such grace. Please, please let us listen to whatever emotions you are feeling when you need to get them out. That's what we are here for if that's what you need.
sherry-congrats again! I'm just so happy for you.
Hi everyone else!post #992 of 15193/30/13 at 1:12pmQuote:Daurelia, ((hugs)) to you. I did read that blog post yesterday. A different blog of his was in my feed and I ended up reading this one on infertility. And then I cried, hard, while reading it. I'm not really part of this thread, mostly because I don't fit the infertility description and I was only lurking to stalk a friend's pregnancy (hi, Sila!). But 5 miscarriages in a row has certainly put me through all of those experiences- ambivalence, awkwardness, everything. Especially the one about being angry at all of the pregnant women. I still feel very raw and hurt by the experiences from these past two years of trying and losing, over and over again. Even though we are cautiously expecting in August, I very much dreading the mid-April due date of the last baby we lost. Thanks for putting into words something I have been thinking about since reading that blog yesterday.Originally Posted by daurelia
Did anyone read this blog post? http://www.stevewiens.com/2013/03/26/ten-words-that-describe-infertility/
I identified with it SO much. I especially identified with feeling awkward, and ambivalent.
After so much trying and so many miscarriages, there gets to be a point where you simply run out of Fs to give. The next time I get a positive pregnancy test, I will experience many conflicting emotions, one of them for sure being "so what?". This experience that is supposed to be so beautiful and life-changing has been robbed from us and instead we're left with feeling empty and numb about it.post #993 of 15193/30/13 at 4:03pm
Daurelia- This really is such a crapshoot of emotions. The blog did hit home hard though and was comforting in a strange, painful, tear stained way. Sending hugs and luck to you on your cycle. What is your protocol? Is she making any changes for this month?
Sherry- Waiting anxiously for updates from you!
AFM- Okay, are you ready for this. I ended up walking out on the party after about 5 minutes (it was at a paint bar, we hadn't even started painting yet). My sister brought up that my pregnant cousin was coming and I (mistakenly) tried to be honest about my opinion and my fears/anxiety about the night. Instead of my expectation that she would be supportive and compassionite, she chewed me out about last year I was pissed that this cousin didn't come to something and now I'm pissed that she did (which I immediately said was a completly different situation and asked her to please stop because she was making me upset) and she went on with how nobody (i.e. her) knows what to say or do or how to act around me (to which I again asked her to stop and said she was making me upset and I was going to leave). She continued on so I said forget it I'm leaving, so I got my coat and phone and went for a walk. But then I was crying and feeling abandoned so I called DH who luckily was still at my sisters a mile away and he picked me up, he drove over to get my purse and my other cousin came out to talk to me (who somehow said just the right things). Then we went and had Frosty's and jpack came and met us there so we got to sit and chat for a while. It was unfortunate because I felt terrible skipping my moms birthday but the night turned out for the better. Then today I texted my coworker... she says she didn't tell anybody at work but was glad I brought it up to her. I still know it will be a struggle for me deal with the day by day of the speaking/breathing/living example of the pregnancy I lost, it was refreshing to clear the air before she announced at work & it felt so awkward. Hoping this helps with my anxiety. So now I have no Easter plans too since I planned to go to my sisters. It just doesn't feel right, which again makes me feel bad for my mom, who came all the way here from Maryland and now is caught in the middle. Sigh... it is so easy to say I have to do whatever to take care of myself, harder to actually act on it.post #994 of 15193/30/13 at 4:39pmpost #995 of 15193/30/13 at 6:23pmHey tf
Man your day sucked!!! I am decompensating. Alone. Dh is in BK on call at 3 hospitals...his mom is there...and I knew I wouldn't see him much so I decided to stay here until he is off....but I didn't know this would happen so I sm in major freaking out misery...trying to remember all my reassurances to bebe...I have over trsted and I am freaking because they aren't darker...but its only been 24 hours right....right???
I am so tired. No sleep. I talked to dh for 15 minutes this morning, and 3 minutes at 7:30...I feel so upset I should probably turn my phone off...ugh
But TF- you win sucky day award! Jeeze
Pic nextpost #996 of 15193/30/13 at 6:26pmpost #997 of 15193/30/13 at 6:31pmpost #998 of 15193/30/13 at 8:22pmpost #999 of 15193/30/13 at 10:21pmpost #1000 of 15193/30/13 at 10:37pmSherry - I see them all too... They look marginally darker than yesterday as well 😄 I totally understand the annoyance of not being able to talk to dh... I've not had it with pregnancy tho... Until feb this year he was a registrar, and the oncalls were a nightmare - especially when I had constant migraines... Some days (hospital and hour away) he would be away from hone up to 7 nights on a row...
TF - don't feel bad about the way the night went, everyone is right your sister was out of line - but it got you to act in your best interests and change things to suit you which I think is awesome! You had a great night in the end, and have cleared the air at work - all done your way... I'm so impressed and only hope I'd be gutsy enough to do the same if it happened to me.
SKJ - thank you! I know it's not the place, but I'm quite happy with it lol... So how are you doing? Has dd noticed anything different yet?
Indie and everyone else - huge hugs!
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