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How Did You or DP/DW Get Pregnant?

11K views 50 replies 25 participants last post by  Twomommyfamily 
#1 ·
Hi Everyone!

I know a thread like this was started back in 2004, but now the thread won't allow me to hit reply and bump it up, so I thought I'd re-start a new thread.

On the drive in to work this morning I thought about how I'd like to see a place where we could all list what we did that ultimately resulted in a BFP. I keep seeing all these BFPs on the Queer Conceptions threads, but then I can't remember what each person did to get pregnant. I could look back through all the threads, but that would take forever. This could be a way to coalesce the information and I think it would be super helpful to those who are still TTC.

I can't wait to read your posts!

xo,

Abby
 
#2 ·
I got pregnant on the 6th try and had a very early loss. I got pregnant again on the 9th try, and I am 17 weeks now. I was doing acupuncture and Chinese herbs. I was taking coQ10, vitamin D, royal jelly, low-dose aspirin, folic acid, a prenatal, B6, fish oil/DHA, evening primrose oil and drinking some red raspberry leaf tea. I took a combination of letrozole/femara and menopur (injectable). I also took metformin and did an HCG trigger with ultrasound monitoring. My doctor recommended metformin saying it had better success rates than Clomid. I do not have PCOS or diabetes, but it seems to have helped. I also took progesterone after O. Jesus! That's a lot of stuff! Oh, well. It worked.
 
#3 ·
I got pregnant on our 5th try (second cycle with follistim). I had been taking metformin for six months. I don't have diabetes or pcos, but like pokey's doctor, mine thought it might help. I was also taking a prenatal vitamin. We used follistim (injections), ultrasound monitoring, bloodwork monitoring (for estrogen levels). I had follistim injections CD 3-9, ultrasounds & bloodwork on CD3, 8, 9, 10, HCG trigger shot on day 10, and two inseminations (with insanely high sperm counts) on CD11 & 12. I mention the insanely high sperm counts because I know several people on this board have gotten pregnant when they switched to donors with really high sperm counts, and I do think it helps. After ovulation, I had an ultrasound on CD13 to confirm ovulation and a blood draw on 7DPO to check my progesterone. I took (am currently still taking, actually) progesterone and estrogen supplements b/c my bloodwork shows I need them. I'll be on them for another 6 weeks.

It's not the process I imagined/dreamed of when we started this, but I like the results.
 
#4 ·
DW got pregnant on our fifth cycle trying. She'd been taking prenatals the whole time, and for the last 3 of the 5 cycles she took Bromelain supplements. She also drank at least one cup of either green or red raspberry leaf tea every day. No alcohol, no caffeine, eating as healthy as we could manage for the whole year prior. We did all our own inseminations intracervically at home, two insems per cycle with frozen donor sperm shipped directly to us. All the tries were unmedicated.

In hindsight, we think that doing two insems per cycle was wasteful. We burned through 10 precious vials and each cycle we felt like only one vial was even close to well-timed. The fifth cycle was actually the ONLY one we felt like we truly nailed the timing. DW's cycles were just different enough from one another that we had trouble pinning down her ovulation. We forced ourselves to wait until 13 DPO to test, and got an obvious second line on the test. Magic.
 
#6 ·
DW got pregnant on the third cycle, the second cycle of using shipped sperm. We used my brother as a KD and did fresh sperm insems at home. First month he was here, and we did three tries around O-3, O-1, and O. Ended in BFN. Second month, we had him ship his sperm in a yolk buffer via a kit from Donor Home Delivery. We insemed on either O-2 or O-1. BFN. Third month, same deal, and insmed on O-1. BFP on 9 DPO.

Each time, we used a (needle-less) syringe to insem and just try to get everything in there as far as possible. She lay in bed for at least half an hour after each insem. That's about it. She also went to acupuncture around the day before each insem, but not specifically for fertility issues, so I'm not sure if it's relevant. FWIW, she was 26 when she got pregnant, and KD was 28.
 
#7 ·
#1- I was 21 and vegan. 2 ici insems with IUI washed vials because that's all they had for our first choice donor. Third try.
#2- I was 23 or 24, the insems were on both sides of my birthday. 2 insems fresh. Second try, first well timed.
#3- I was 29. Fourth try, had just lost 10 pounds. IUI at home. Two insems.
#4- DP was 24. Fourth try. Ultrasound, hcg trigger, IUI at home. One insem.
 
#8 ·
I got pregnant the first 3 times when trying for DD - all m/c though. We have a known donor and did at home inseminations. Insem'd about 5 minutes after getting the sample, used a 5cc oral syringe and pre-seed, orgasm right after releasing the stuff :) I would lay with my butt on a pillow for 20-30 minutes. We usually insem'd 2 or 3 times starting a few days before O. I had/have very regular cycles for the most part so easy to pinpoint O. I used cheapie opks twice a day, checked CM and temped all cycle. We did the same 3 more times and I didn't get pregnant but got pregnant on try #4 with DD :) Oh, and I was 38.

This time I got pregnant 6 out of 8 (or 9?) tries - I just turned 42 in Dec. I did the insems all my self this time around - same donor, same drill. We used the CBFM but I still relied more on opks and cm.

For supplements, for DD, I took a prenatal, coq10, EPA, vitamin e. I did acupuncture weekly and chinese herbs.

This last BFP time around I took a prenatal, EPA, vitamin e, ubiquinol, royal jelly, vitamin d. I did weekly acupuncture but no herbs.
 
#10 ·
We got pregnant on our first try with a a mix of fresh/frozen at home ICI. Unfortunately, this ended in a miscarriage.

After a year of at home IUIs and ICIs, we switched to a FS and began in office IUIs with basic monitoring. We had two miscarriages in that time span along with a laparoscopy to get rid of mild endo and a hysteroscopy to remove a polyp. I also found out that I had borderline FSH and AMH levels...

After a year with the FS, we decided to try gonal F shots with a trigger and more seriously monitored cycle. Our first cycle produced 3 eggs--none took. The second also produced 3 eggs and all 3 took. So, it took us 15 cycles to conceive our triplets! Hey, averaged out that is only 5 per baby...
smile.gif
 
#11 ·
When I first started visiting TTC forums, I was overwhelmed by all the medical talk. I didn't understand the references, and it seemed like everyone was using some sort of drug and struggling. Wasn't there anyone doing it naturally? I tried to prepare the best I could. I read the 2 books that are out there for lesbians TTC. I took a class on timing and one on living a fertile lifestyle. I didn't join a forum until I was many months into TTC. I think it's hard too because when we do seek out medical help, we are often treated as infertile when we are not. You have to be an advocate for yourself and think through each decision and find the balance that works for you.

To anyone else who feels overwhelmed by the medical talk-Queer women do get pregnant naturally! It can happen! It doesn't happen for everyone, and you have to keep an open mind, but it does happen. I just wanted to say this for anyone who feels overwhelmed like I did. No matter where you are in the process, support from others in the same boat is great. I'm so glad I have had Mothering this last year.
 
#12 ·
I'm right on the heels of my fourth natural try so maybe I'm a little heightened emotionally, but pokey thank you so much for your words, you brought me to tears this morning.

What a fantastic resource this will be for us and others if we ask every QC graduate to post here. Thanks for starting it sotohana! Since I am the QC threadkeeper this month I hope no one minds, but I am going to add a link to this thread from our first post and encourage graduates to pop over here and record their BFP story.
 
#14 ·
First time trying, last year. Doing OPKs, and temping, but not charting. All 4 of our insems were timed around 30 hours after +OPK. My temp the morning after the +OPK seemed like it hadn't spiked yet. First 3 tries were IVI using syringe and instead cup, last try was ICI with speculum and syringe with adapter tube and instead cup. All BFN.

We visited an RE the following month, he suggested an HSG before spending more money on cycles that might not be working because of blocked tubes. HSG showed right tube was completely blocked. RE suggested a laproscopy. I had the appointment to have it done, but decided to try 1 IUI with RE before doing such an expensive surgery. We didn't have the money yet to do the IUI, so we waited.

After our money situation improved, we decided to try 2 more home insems before doing an IUI with an RE. Found a more economical sperm bank (we chose the 5-9.9 million MOT[ility] level category). The donor happened to have reported pregnancies (our previous donor had not).

Cycle before the insem, I began temping and charting this time, doing OPKs 4 times a day after I got my first fade-in. Also, was checking CM and cervical position. The evening after my afternoon +OPK, cervical position was high, had EWCM (very little though) and cervix was very open. My temp the morning after my complete positive, had modestly spiked, but still indicated O. Realized our previous attempts were probably after O. Planned for the insem cycle to be 12 hours after positive OPK.

The insem cycle, did the same thing, OPKs 4 times a day after first fade-in and checked CM and cervical position. At 10 hours after +OPK, we did the insem, doing an ICI with a speculum and syringe (didn't have an adapter available and we forewent the instead cup). Immediately before the insem, DSp gave me an orgasm. Immediately after the insem, I stayed with a pillow under my butt for 2 hours.

Abra cadabra, presto chango, BFP!

DSp was very frustrated through the whole process and didn't feel capable of doing the insems and thought a doctor was needed and it absolutely would never work at home.......

*As for stuff I took before TTC, the first time trying, last year, I was taking a prenatal, and also zinc after I got my OPK fade-in and throughout the 2WW.

This year trying, I was taking a prenatal, and also zinc after OPK fade-in. We were attempting to boy-sway, so I was taking 99 mg potassium as well and drinking tomato juice, pineapple juice, and apple juice, low in calcium and magnesium (to increase alkalinity of CM). I was also testing my CM for acidity/alkalinity. I found it too low for boy sperm to survive very well and borderline for girl sperm to even survive very well. I tried to pasteurize an egg myself to use the EW, but ended up fully hard boiling it. So I tired the baking soda finger, where you wet your finger, dip in baking soda, and insert in. Stung a little (it went away after a little bit), but it boosted up my alkalinity and made me produce more CM instantly.
 
#15 ·
esenbee - This is so great and detailed - thank you! Can you tell me, how long before your insem did you do the "baking soda finger"?
 
#16 ·
They say an hour before. I think for me it ended up being an hour and a half before. Also, you can do do baking soda baths for a few days prior. 1 cup of baking soda in 2-3 inches of water. I ran across that information too late (night of insem) to work, but I would have went with that over the finger if I had read it sooner. Hopefully my alkalinity stayed high enough after my orgasm before the insem, I didn't test to see.

*Also, might want to do your own research on it, as there are concerns out there of an increased risk of infection, so however much you feel comfortable with the idea, kind of thing!
 
#18 ·
#19 ·
I would like to add that we did 2 IUI's per cycle with frozen. I O'd right before the IUI unless I forgot. We did some at the RE's office and some at home with a midwife who just does at-home insem's. She was awesome! She helped with timing and talked us down when we were freaking out. We had a speculum and I would have DW check for cervical position and openness. I charted on paper at first and then switched to Fertility Friend. They were having a special deal on a 1-year membership for really cheap. When I signed up, I was sure I wouldn't need it for very long, but I did end up using it for a while.
 
#20 ·
We started with my DP .. 8 tries with a known donor..2 tries a cycle.. she never got preg.. her ins did not cover any type of fertility..

so we moved to me.. I was told for 15 yrs that I could not have a baby.. I have PCOS and had not ovulated on my own in a very long time.. I had good ins and switched to a new RE.. she agreed to let me start Metformin again, along with 100 mg clomid.. after 3 tries we added in the Menapur ( Injectables) the 5th try we had 3 great follicles but they pushed my insem at the RE office by two days ( day 16) I was sure it was to late.. and we did not have good timing. I also had done a trigger shot 32 hours prior to my IUI.. We went on a week long camping trip.. and came back.. day 12 BFN.. started spotting.. but day 14.. i felt off.. took another test .. BFP.. i was floored.. i was sure it wouldnt be viable..

Imagine our shock at the 6 week U/S and we are expecting our triplets in less than 6 weeks!!!!
 
#21 ·
Less than 6 weeks! That's so awesome Cananny! You two are triply lucky!
 
#22 ·
Before trying, I cut back on caffeine, started eating/drinking whole fat dairy products (which supposedly helps regulate Ovulation) and went to a fertility acupuncturist. I am on my 2nd pregnancy and did this both times. I also took chinese herbs twice a day. I think my acupunturist is a miracle worker so if anyone is in the NYC area and needs a reference, let me know! I went once a week except for the week it worked when I went twice, including the day of O. And then once a week for the next two months too.

This pregnancy I got pregnant on the 3rd try, using shipped sperm from a KD. I tracked using ovulation strips (the smiley ones and the CBEFM which someone gave me) I also did temping to make sure the Ovulation indicators were matching up. We did two insems each cycle, one on the day of surge and one day of O (since were using fresh this seemed to be a good timing) I sat in bed for at least an hour after, and lay on each side. (My cervic is really high up and far back so I had read in the Brill book this could help to coat the cervix) Who knows? I usually had an O after the first 15-30 minutes.

I think that's it!
 
#23 ·
Got a BFP during our fourth cycle trying (earlier cycles were not as well timed). On day 2 of my cycle I started drinking raspberry leaf tea (both Yogi and Traditional Medicinals brands) and continued 3 times a day during menstruation, and tapered off to once a day for the following week, then none right before ovulation. This was my first time trying any herbs. I had already been taking Naturemade Prenatal Multivitamins with DHA for the previous three months. We did not use any medical or natural interventions such as medications, triggers, acupuncture, or massage. I have always had good general health, regular cycles, and a decent diet/exercise routine - cardio workouts 2-3 times per week, lots of organic vegetables and dairy, limited processed foods and refined carbohydrates. I do eat moderate amounts of meat and fish most days, usually pasture raised and/or organic. I'm 31 years old at the time of conception.

The week of Ovulation:

CD18 - In the evening, small amounts of EWCM arrived, and cervix was high and soft.

CD19 - I got almost positive OPKs at both 11am and 2:30pm, followed by lots of EWCM at 2:30pm. I got positive OPKs at 5:15pm (with both the cheap internet type and the ClearBlue digital), cervix was high and soft. I went for a workout (about an hour of heavy cardio), and then did the first insemination around 7:30pm.

CD20 - Lots of EWCM throughout the day. Second insemination around 6:00pm. Lots of emotion/mood swings around 8pm that I attributed to the wave of progesterone post ovulation. FF later confirmed ovulation for CD20.

Each insemination was done via IVI at home using a syringe with a 1cc raw/unwashed vial of frozen sperm, 46 million motile swimmers. I had orgasms both immediately before and after each insemination. I then spent 15 minutes lying on my back with my hips elevated, followed by 5 minutes lying on each side, and then five minutes lying on my stomach. After that, I stayed in bed for a couple more hours with hips elevated before using the toilet and going to sleep.

Starting on the day of ovulation this cycle, I decided to switch my prenatals to some thing more natural, so during the TWW I was instead taking Rainbow Light Prenatal One multivitamins and the Nordic Naturals DHA supplement. I completely abstained from caffeine during the TWW (never consumed much before anyway) and I had a couple glasses of wine on occasion, but no alcohol after 6DPO.

Here is a link to my FF chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/3d8708
 
#24 ·
My DW got pregnant on the 4th try, we did a self insemination with a friend as our donor. She ended up having miscarriage at 20 months, and then 3 months later I got pregnant on the first try. I wasn't charting my ovulation or anything. It was kind of spur of the moment because we had always planed of DW to be the one to get prego, but she felt like she wouldn't be ready to try again for a while. We were in the same state as our donor, and we just figured we'd give it a try. We stopped buy his house and he did his thing into a shot glass and passed it off to us, and voila. I was shocked when it worked, I spent the first 5 months freaking out and feeling like we weren't ready, but it all worked out in the end.
 
#25 ·
I got pregnant on our second IUI with frozen sperm. That seems so short when you don't consider the fact that we spent almost a year working on my underlying health/hormone issues before we were given the clear to actually inseminate. I was on a vegetarian, whole foods diet (kind of like the PCOS diet even though I don't have a PCOS dx) and wasn't eating any sugar substitutes, soda, highly processed foods, etc. I was doing yoga and getting thai massage and chiropractic care and working out 3-4 times per week. I was still overweight by BMI standards, though. I took a high quality whole foods prenatal, Floradix, vitamin D, Vitex, B complex, metformin, and a low dose aspirin. Because I have Cushing's Disease, we were high intervention from the start. With both IUI cycles, I did femara, bravelle, and hcg trigger with ultrasound monitoring. Progesterone after insem for a month.

During the insemination itself I used a mixture of breathing and meditation techniques . . . and I turned on the Indigo Girls just to help start our little gayby off on the right foot :)
 
#26 ·
I think this is such a cool space to share our various stories! It's inspiring to see all the different experiences out there.

We got our BFP on our 2nd cycle trying, natural IUI with frozen donor sperm. The IUI was performed by our naturopath. We did two insems that cycle (we only did one the previous cycle). We didn't start our IUIs until after about 7 months of temping, charting, acupuncture and Chinese medicine to help regulate my cycle and identify ovulation. Along with temping, I used digital OPKs to help pinpoint ovulation. I also quit caffeine, started drinking green smoothies, and took a billion supplements as recommended by my ND: fish oil, prenatal vitamin, vitamin D...I know there were more but I am having a hard time remembering what they all are right now! I also drank "fertility tea" every day: nettles, rose hips, oat straw, red clover, raspberry leaf, and some other herbs (I can dig up the exact blend if anyone is interested, just let me know). Of course, it's hard to know if all of these herbs and supplements were truly necessary, but they obviously didn't hurt!

looking back, I feel the acupuncture and Chinese herbs were probably the most helpful preparation that I did. It helped me learn about my cycle, and my charts truly started to regulate after a few months (nothing was wrong, but my charts looked nothing like the charts in the books when I first started, there were no high and low periods, it was just all over the place. After a few months of acupuncture, my charts looked like they were "supposed" to look). Also crucial was telling/reminding myself that I am fertile, that just because I am queer does not mean I am less fertile or will have a harder time getting pregnant than a straight woman. This was truly important and necessary for me, because the more I read about ovulation and OPKs and charting and this and that, the more lost and overwhelmed I felt. I tried to just trust my gut and my body. Finally, Stephanie Brill's book about conception was an awesome resource.

Good luck to all of you who are TTCing!!!!!! May you soon find yourself bouncing a swaddled newborn on a yoga ball while playing a You Tube video of white noise at 4 in the morning. ;-)
 
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