My exh is currently in the hospital with severe frostbite on both feet. He's a homeless alcoholic and was very drunk, got his feet wet, and slept outside. I have no idea how he did it, but he walked to my house and I called 911 when he tried to warm up and could not, and I saw his feet were purple and grey. He couldn't feel his left foot at all, and was in extreme pain in his right foot. He was in intensive care for 2 days, but has been moved to a regular room.
His feet are not doing well at all. His left one is much worse than his right. They have exploded, covered in blood blisters and the skin was black. The drs removed the skin on both feet, he said his left big toe is barely attached. He has an infection in his left side almost up to his knee. Tomorrow he's going to see the drs to find out what is going to happen. A heart problem was also found, his heart beats irregularly and too fast. He'll get results of all blood work and other tests hopefully in the morning.
There is a chance he is going to lose his left foot and leg up to the knee, as well as toes on his right foot. I'm so scared for him! I can't sleep, I'm heading for a breakdown. Doesn't help that he actually tried to blame this on me and others, because no one wants to let him in when he's that intoxicated. He was treating me horribly, and I had to stop going to see him. I was the only one going, I brought him clothes and deodorant and things he needed. Our dd did see him once, ds refused to see him at all, and dd does not want to go back. She did tell him she loved him over the phone. I've been talking to him again, he's now seeing a social worker, they are trying to figure out where he goes from the hospital. His sister called him once, no one else has bothered. He burnt his bridges with everyone he knows with the things he's said and did while drunk.
I'm just a huge mess. I'm so angry, scared and hurt that he did this to himself. Thankfully dd is doing ok, she's been very cuddly, spending a lot of time with me. Ds doesn't seem to be affected, having autism he doesn't always feel things the way "normal" people do, and I feel that's a blessing right now. This has been a VERY bad week. My aunt passed away at the age of 61, from cancer. She had her leg amputated up to the top of her thigh. Then this, and on Thursday, the day of her wake, the large apartment house directly across the street from mine had a horrible fire. Thankfully everyone and every pet is ok, but it left 5 families homeless, one of the apartments was vacant. It really scared us, had the fire department not put it out fast who knows what could have happened, if the wind had blown the right way, debris could have hit our house as the road in very narrow so it wouldn't have had far to go.
I am in serious financial trouble, my account is overdrawn $700, and that is my entire check for the month of February. I get a little more money for ds and dd, but I just don't know what to do. So much is piling up, I feel like I'll explode. Doesn't help that I've been battling a virus for over a month, I'm still coughing and having some trouble breathing from asthma, but it slowly going away.
Anyway, I want to be there for exh, I want to help him get better. I just don't know if I can. It's very hard for me to get to the hospital, I can take the bus into Providence but I have no one to care for ds most of the time. He does receive services 5 days a week, but it's really not long enough for me to take the hour bus ride, then another bus to the hospital, and back again. I do try to call often, but I always end up crying and I don't think he needs to hear that right now. I'm so scared to get that phone call tomorrow. This really sucks. Dd said please tell her that 2013 will get better, but I can't promise her something I have no control over. This poor kid has been through so much hell in her 14 years, I don't know how much more she can take, how much more any of us can take. Thanks for reading, I'm going to try for an hour or so of sleep before I have to get the kids up for school.
Follow Mothering