any older moms? I'm 42 and just got a lucky surprise :) - Page 2 « Back to Group Discussions

[amanda bee]

suziesmiles:

I have a midwife appointment for the week after i move. i have been doing research on CVS and amnio...super scary...these tests can result in miscarriage, infection, fetal limb damage, etc....the more i read the less i want to read :( *** and i do not want to get any testing done...yet at the same time i miscarried twins at 5 months & it was a horrific experience for me (both emotionally & physically)...i feel guilty that i might have been able to save my babies if I had undergone more testing and found out that they had twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome... sigh.....

i did have a healthy son a couple years later (but had a completely medicalized pregnancy & birth). 

i also do not want to go down the highly medicalized pregnancy route but feel pressured to do so because of my age.

i will get my first u/s on march 19...and decide from there...right now i don't want to do any tests unless imperative for my babies health.

this time i am trying not to stress, nor worry until i need to.

[SuzieSmiles]

Oh amanda bee - I'm so sorry for your twin loss, having to go through that, I can't even imagine. The research is scary and the guilt thing really can go either way can't it? Dangers for testing and dangers if you don't test, ugh! I've also read stories where women were super healthy, did everything 'right' and ended up miscarrying anyway. On the other side, read of women who were very unhealthy, didn't do everything 'right' and ended up with a perfect baby. Somehow it just doesn't make sense or seem fair...

I'm not doing all of the intense research and reading these stories with this pregnancy, I did too much of that before. I just try to do my best to stay positive. Sometimes you just have to have faith and let it be what it will be. Believing it's the right time for us is all that DH & I have been focusing on, it's what gets us though every day:)  

My midwife has been awesome about the age thing, didn't seem to be concerned at all (even though I did have a miscarriage). She said that older moms have more life experience and this really seems to help with pregnancy, birth and being a parent which made me feel soooo good!! And, I think that we can be more in tune with our bodies (makes sense, I mean we've had them longer, right) which I believe will help guide us throughout our pregnancies. I truly hope that you're able come to a decision that feels right for you and that you have a happy, healthy, blissful pregnancy.

[amanda bee]

Originally Posted by SuzieSmiles 

My midwife has been awesome about the age thing, didn't seem to be concerned at all (even though I did have a miscarriage). She said that older moms have more life experience and this really seems to help with pregnancy, birth and being a parent which made me feel soooo good!! And, I think that we can be more in tune with our bodies (makes sense, I mean we've had them longer, right) which I believe will help guide us throughout our pregnancies. I truly hope that you're able come to a decision that feels right for you and that you have a happy, healthy, blissful pregnancy.

yes :) suziesmiles i love it! i definitely think older mamas have more life experience & are more in tune with their bodies...lol 

(i am still undecided about testing)...i am trying to listen to my body & trying not to stress...my first u/s will be on march 19th (11 weeks) & we will decide what we want to do from there. 

my mantra is to relax and remain positive throughout my pregnancy. 

thank you for your kind and supportive words!

[naturallyme]

I will be 42 when this one joins us. So far it is very similiar to my other pregnancies. I am due on 9/26. I am so hoping that the nausea doesn't get any worse. It's pretty okay right now. I only had nausea for 2 weeks with my second :) but had it all evening with my first and it started at about 11am with my third and lasted through bedtime :( I can control it pretty well though, if I eat something as soon as I feel it, I can keep it at bay. I couldn't wear a bra yesterday, too painful. Fortunately, even at 41 and nursing all my babes over 2 years each, I have pretty round, perky breasts so I can get away with just a cami :)

Blessings to you all!!!

[cmu204]

I think I hate you a little bit, naturallyme -- I haven't been perky since the 90s!

[joyakshi]

I'm kinda bummed that I started this thread and am out of the DDC already. Just when I got happy and excited about this pg I started to m/c. 2 weeks later and I still have a trilaminar lining and gestational sac, but my HCG and progesterone have completely dropped off. I only had a couple days of moderate bleeding 2 weeks ago, so it's all very vague. So I'm a bit in limbo although hormonally I can't possibly be pregnant anymore.

Wish I could continue with you all for the next 8 months. good luck to you.

[amanda bee]

Sending you big hugs joyakshi!

[Jennyanydots]

I'm sorry to hear it, joyakshi.
I haven't told anyone but DP yet, haven't even contacted our MW, because I don't have high hopes for this one sticking either. We shall see... Good luck to you with this and in the future if you decide to try again.

[naturallyme]

More hugs joyakshi :-(

[amanda bee]

i was trying to find info positive information online about older women and pregnancy (not the scary stats/risks etc.)...

it cracks me up that in medical terms we are considered elderly primigravida (1st pregnancy in a woman who will be 35+ at EDD)

or multigravidia (second or more pregnancy in woman 35+ at EDD)...

seriously we are considered ELDERLY?

so freaking offensive...

in my web search i came across some ELDERLY "celeb moms" who gave birth over 35 years of age 

(i think i was only aware of madonna, sadly, i am not up on celeb pregnancies)

uma thurman  (child #3) at 41 

madonna (1st child at 38 & 2nd at 42)

salma hayek (1st child at 41)

jane seymour (twins at 45)

geena davis (1st kid at 45 & twins at 47)

halle berry (1st kid at 41)

holy hunter  (twins 47)

susan sarandon (3rd child 45)

(possible *elderly* inspiration?) 

[serena76]

Looking at the list makes me being 37 feel young! Lol

[SuzieSmiles]

amanda bee - I love that you posted that list of 'older' celebs giving birth:) I too have looked into this before... here's a few more:

Emma Thompson (40)

JK Rowling (37, 39)

Iman (44)

Brooke Shields (37, 41)

Julia Roberts (37 twins, 39)

Courtney Cox Arquette (41)

Jennifer Lopez (38 twins)

Julianne Moore (41)

Helen Hunt (40)

Jennifer Beals (41)

Marcia Cross (44 twins)

Nicole Kidman (41)

Mariah Carey (41 twins)

Also, for those of you interested... I ran across some cool articles about older moms:)

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/singletons/200810/forty-or-close-is-the-new-20-having-babies

One quote from the above article that I loved said: "The New England Centenarian Study conducted by Boston University Medical Center found that women who give birth after 40 were four times more likely to live to 100 or longer than were women who gave birth at younger ages."

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2179353/Women-birth-LATER-lower-risk-cancer.html

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/melanie-notkin/fertility_b_1434842.html

[amanda bee]

suziesmiles: awesome articles!!! thanks!

 Plus i did not realize how many 35+ mama celebs there are!

i feel so hip!

[aimfatale]

I just joined the group. I will be 37 in April and this is my second baby. I have definitely found the fatigue to be much more profound this time and I am less able to persevere through it. But it's hard to take a nap when your two-tear-old has all but dropped theirs! Boy if I only knew how good I had it the first time when I was "only" pregnant and only had to take care of myself. But I was too wrapped up in the stress and anxiety of preparing for birth and motherhood and preoccupied with all the unpleasant symptoms, to really surrender into pregnancy and just experience it. Trying to take a different approach this time but it's hard. I seem to get all the negative side effects and none of the little perks. (Like, where is this thick, lustrous hair I keep hearing about? Oh, oh here it is -- on my LEGS.) Anyways, nice to see some other 'older' moms on here. 

[SuzieSmiles]

Welcome aimfatale! I love your comment about the perks, I keep wondering the same thing! The other day I actually googled "when does the pregnancy glow start"?  

[amanda bee]

still waiting for the glow as well...

welcome aimfatale!!!

[amanda bee]

just checking in with the older mamas...

i had my NT today...it was the first time i saw my bean via ultrasound... heart beat was 155.

the tech would not give me any other info & i was told it would take 3-4 days to get results & blood work back (waiting impatiently).

i am just entering the 2nd trimester & m/s is starting to finally subside...i still have weird food aversions & i am pretty exhausted.

my goals for the next month are to start doing yoga daily & walking or treading for at least 30 minutes a day.

how is everyone else's pregnancy going?

[greentomato]

I'm 37 and this is my first pregnancy and (potentially) first kid.  So far, things could be worse, but they could also be better.  I think the morning sickness (or for me, evening sickness) is definitely getting better. 

Serena -- I second your comment about the list of celebs making me feel relatively young. 

[Abraxas]

I am 35 and this will be my first baby. I was pregnant last year but lost the baby, a boy, at 14w5d. I've gone through a lot of testing but they still have no idea as to the cause. I am being monitored very closely by my midwives and perinatologist this time around. I have been really exhausted this time around, and I've had a lot of weird food aversions and cravings for junk food, as amandabee mentioned above...

I just hit 13 weeks and I am admittedly starting to get a little nervous. I've stayed home most of this week because I had an episode of scary red spotting Monday night, and a diagnostic ultrasound the next day. We saw the baby and everything seems to be ok but I am staying off my feet, taking time off and working from home until I find out if there was a cause.

Congrats to all you mamas, glad to be a part of this group 

[serena76]

I'm actually feeling old lately. So tired all the time 😴and fed up of feeling sick😖