Help me decide

[lovemylab]

My almost two year old and I sleep together in a full sized bed. My husband sleeps in his king sized bed, initially he was afraid to hurt the baby while sleeping, which is why we sleep in a different room.

Here is the thing; my daughter (she doesnt seem to like the toddler bed mattress it says its firm but i guess not firm enough) is such a bed hog and its hard for me to sleep. And now we have baby number two on the way. I don't know where everyone should sleep. Should I let my daughter take over the full size bed and move the crib out of her room and use for new baby? My husband says his sleep has changed in the last few years so he isn't worried about crushing new baby if we wanted to co sleep in the big bed. But I am thinking that maybe this kid needs to be in a crib at least for part of the night. So that I don't get stuck going to bed crazy early and can still get my daughter ready for bed.

Any thoughts? I am just confused on what to do.... Originally I was going to have both kids in the same room right away but my daughter is a very light sleeper.

[skycheattraffic]

I'm in a similar situation so I'll tell you my plan. You can decide if it makes sense to you. It's untested since baby is due in July. DD (almost 22 months) is in her own room on a double bed. I lay down with her and nurse her to sleep (or wait until she falls asleep if nursing doesn't do it). I then leave. Her bed is a very very low one from Ikea so I'm not at all worried about her falling. Basically her mattress is two maybe three inches off the ground - no box spring. I sleep with DH in another room. The third bedroom is set up with the crib and a very comfy recliner for me to nurse. Baby will start out in the crib and I'll go to baby as needed. When DD wakes up, I'll go to her room and I'll take baby too if needed. I'm getting baby a Moses basket to put on the floor in DD's room and move around as needed. My added wrinkle is that DH can't miss much sleep due to epilepsy so I plan to either sleep with DH with the baby monitor right in my ear (as I did with DD) or sleep with DD on her double, getting up to nurse baby (who is in the Moses basket) as needed. It may be tough at first but I'm hoping DD will be down to one wakeup consistently and it might be between baby's wakeups . Good luck to you mama, and let me know how it goes. I may need more ideas too! Btw when are you due?

[lovemylab]

I am due in June. I guess I feel bad not co sleeping with baby #2 since I have been for so long with the first. Your idea sound similar to what I will probably end up doing.

[skycheattraffic]

Try not to feel guilty. You did what worked for you at the time. The family is changing and growing so the same arrangement just isn't practical for baby number two. Remember too that they are different kids with different needs and it may turn out that your second baby sleeps better with more space even if your first needed closeness. I used to feel guilty for not really cosleeping with DD (outside of a handful of occasions with teething/illness) but we keep each other up. If you all end up rested and happy then that's the important indicator that tells you: this arrangement works!

[lovemylab]

I sure hope this baby is different my daughter was a tough infant and a horrible sleeper. Still working on the sleeping part.