When does a little boy need to stop peeing outside . . . in suburbia?

[Brooke Morris]

I find it okay for little boys to pee outside, most people are so uptight

[mamahawk]

I allowed my son to pee outside this summer, and he was 4 1/2.  I was always paranoid that someone would say something, but that never happened.  Most of his outdoor pees were in our own yard, or at a farm we visit alot (with like-minded, free-spirited people), but there were a few occasions where I had to let him do his thing in public-  The park (the restroom was locked), the fountain (in a shielded spot between buildings), and once in some bushes next to a parking lot and busy street (He REFUSED to use the restroom in the restaurant- loud toilets used to scare him and we were on a road trip).  

I wouldn't let him do it now-  In my mind he is simply too old, and he has overcome a lot his fears and is capable of 'holding it' until we find a more appropriate place.  However, I don't judge, or care when I see little boys peeing, or children running around naked, or whatever :)

[ashleyhaugh]

my son is 5 and he pees outside in our yard. I rarely let him do it in public, I never really have, but I will shield him and let him pee on the car tire for example, if it is an emergency, and we're not near a bathroom

[Polliwog]

Call me uptight, if you must. I don't think it's ever appropriate, barring an emergency. The same would apply to my daughter.

[rightkindofme]

My daughter is 4.5 and I have no plans to ask her to stop.

[Banana731]

Okinawan boys pee on the street for a long time. I think they look at it pragmatically. If the kid has to go and there is no where else to do it, then they have to go.

I think if it's not in your neighbors rose bush or somplace where a person is going to come put a picnic blanket down, then it's not really a big deal to go if you really have to.

I suppose all that matters is courtesy to others, not the act itself.

[mcb2102]

Since I've done it myself many times in a pinch, I don't think I could tell a child not to! But it would have to be discreet and courteous (I.e. following the "picnic blanket rule" mentioned previously)

[~cassie~]

My 5 1/2 yr old still does.  Sometimes inappropriately.  As in waiting for a train and he went in front of 200 people.  I don't see a problem to be honest.  Dogs pee everywhere, why is it ok for them to and not a little child who can't make it to the potty?

[crunchy_mommy]

Originally Posted by mcb2102 

Since I've done it myself many times in a pinch, I don't think I could tell a child not to! But it would have to be discreet and courteous (I.e. following the "picnic blanket rule" mentioned previously)

I mean, if there's a bathroom convenient (or he can wait a bit) then he uses the bathroom, but if he needs to go, as long as he's courteous & discrete, I don't see the problem at any age.

[littlest birds]

I taught ds not to pee in the front yard as a toddler.  We have a private backyard, with trees and fencing so I tell him to go where no one can see him in the back.  We have only one bathroom so if it's occupied dh or ds can go in the yard discreetly.  Boys can get enough privacy just by facing bushes or a fence. 

I remember when my ds would not only pee in the yard but was happy to do so facing the street, ten feet away from passing cars.  He was around 3yo then, and I did start to encourage him to find a more private place even though we laughed and weren't upset by it.  It started out as me telling him about privacy but by the time he was old enough for it to bother me he cared about the privacy on his own.  At 7 or 8 he would not have peed facing the street--he did pee on the raspberries though since they are the closest "bushes" to our house when he walks out the back door.

I think crossing social boundaries that involve "private parts" could be badly interpreted by neighbors, other children, or even a predator and it is good for kids to have some awareness of those boundaries before they reach school age.  There are times and places like camping and such where it is much more relaxed so that's always nice.  I think it is good to start teaching kids the basic concepts of what to be private about and how as soon as they can grasp any of it, because it plays a part in safety and in generally knowing how to get along with others.

[Mama Amie]

My DS is 4 1/2, and we do a moderate amount of outside peeing.  I've been trying to limit it more lately, just because his 18 month old sister is now constantly removing her diaper to attempt to pee on trees like him.    I am happy to allow it in any emergency situation or if we're just too messy to go inside.  If anyone has a problem with it, I gently remind them that it's socially acceptable to allow dogs to pee just about anywhere without recourse.  As long as my child isn't brazenly waving his tallywhacker in everyone's faces or peeing on someone's personal possessions, I find it perfectly acceptable at this age.  After age 7, or so, more discretion can be applied.  Honestly, my son prefers his privacy at this point.  

[beautyandtheink]

I understand that if it an emergency there would be a reason but other than that I don't see why there would be a reason to allow it. Just seems gross to me. Granted I only have a girl, but I think that even if I had a boy I would still tell him to use the bathroom. Just not my thing I guess.

[JudiAU]

Eh. It isn't my preference but it has happened plenty of times. We also have a much loved car potty. My kids are trained by age 2, but they are still 2 and if they need to go they need to go.Never had a problem except once this man was a huge jerk about it. I actually told him that is was time to walk away and leave us away. 

[missnoodlesmom]

We are pretty relaxed about it - my 4 y/o (boy) and 6 y/o (girl) both use the great outdoors when necessary. Considering the fact that I do as well when necessary, I don't see myself telling the kids they can't ever. Pragmatically, it has to e better than peeing in your pants