Dear Soon-to-be Parents,
If you take nothing else away from this forum but the heart-felt advice not to parent like your brother and sister in law you will be doing yourselves and your child an enormous favor.
There is no logical reason to ever spank a 2 year old.
2 year olds bite and kick and slap because they can't verbalize their inner turmoil. 2 year olds act out because they are tired, hungry thirsty or frustrated. Fill the need and the behavior improves.
2 year olds need lots of eye contact when spoken to. When you want to interact with a 2 year old, they have to see your face.
Gentle discipline is about disciplining your own behavior first and foremost.
children do not have to conform to our expectations.