Queer, Pregnant, and Parenting--February and March 2013! - Page 4

[planet]

On the diapers: I always have to chime in my support for cloth diaper service!  We love it! It is SUPER easy!  For us it's about the same price as doing laundry at our place (we live in an apartment with coin-op), and also when people want to get gifts for our baby, we suggest contributing to the service.  Going on five months and we haven't had to pay for any of the service yet!  Just something to keep in mind for all of you cloth diaper ponderers! :)

Desert, we love the Thirsties covers the most, too.  What do you mean about stripping the pre-folds?

Cordelia, WOW! That sounds intense, and also like it went really well, considering the situation.  What an amazing testament to the strength of your "quirky" family that you were able to introduce DS to your donor's family to such a warm welcome, without drama.

Seraf, we heard about the recall on the Rock N Play (actually, the first person to tell me about it was the guy who sold it to me via Craigslist, which I thought was really sweet and thoughtful of him to share that information with me).  We checked ours out and there is absolutely no sign of mold, so we are going to keep using it, probably until the bitter end, because it is working so well for us!  We'll just keep checking it every now and then to make sure we're all good.  Also, I always love your videos!

Sphinxy, good luck with the snacks!  I had to snack SO much when I was pregnant, and I would get sick of foods so quickly; it was tough.  We just learned to keep a huge variety of little snacks around at all times (my sweet partner was great at being on top of that!).

Carmen, wow!  You have a lot going on.  And it's exciting!  How are you feeling about your first trip away from you little one?

Pokey, sorry to hear about the placenta previa.  I am also thinking positive, upward-facing thoughts for you!

Amanda, what an incredible photo!  On the Justin Beiber front, I teach 7th grade at an all-girls school, so I am unfortunately very familiar with his songs (and his face, and his personal life...and pretty much everything else about him! ;)  That's so fun that she loves to sing!

Knitting, sorry you feel crappy! The fuzzy crocs sound perfect.  I can relate - only to a point, of course! - by the end of my pregnancy, my feet were so swollen I couldn't wear any of my own shoes.  I had to go to work wearing DP's grandma's old crocs!  You are working hard growing two babies. I'm sending you all my comforting thoughts!

Cananny, beautiful photos!  I am thinking of you!  Getting so excited about "meeting" them soon!

AFU, Wylie is almost 5 months old!  I can't believe how much time has flown...especially considering all those long nights and fussy evenings early on! Time certainly did not feel like it was flying in those moments.  We are still figuring out childcare.  My mom is now going to watch him for a half day instead of the whole day.  That way he can just nap in the stroller and she won't have to take him out on three stroller rides to get all the naps he needs in.  She was very understanding and cool with the new plan.  She actually seems somewhat relieved herself.  We have a friend who can temporarily watch him for the first few afternoons; we need to find a (semi)permanent solution.  I was able to spend some time with her and Wylie this morning.  She is great with him as long as he's happy, but is rather helpless when he fusses.  It is challenging to not jump in and "rescue" him, and to give her a chance to learn, but we are doing it. 

The work/life balance is interesting.  I am home from work for the day because the 7th grade is currently on their 2-night "Lewis & Clark" trip to Cape Disappointment/Fort Stevens (border of WA & OR) area.  It is a great chance to learn and bond with the students and I have always gone in the past.  But we are not ready for Wylie and I to spend a night away from each other yet.  (I can't imagine when I will be ready for that!) The 7th graders were like, "Just bring him on the trip with you! Puh-leeeeeeaze!"  Ha!  So I am glad to be home with him, and also sad to be missing out on this important experience for my job. 

Hugs to all of you! xoxo

[pokeyAC]

planet--Cape Disappointment, eh?  That sounds interesting.  I'm sure it's beautiful though.  I'm glad you are getting into a groove and working things out with your mom. 

cordelia--I'm glad you were able to have such a great visit!

Carmen--Good luck with your class and the trip!  It should be a little easier now that you are in the second trimester, but still a lot of work.

Everyone I missed--Thanks for more great diaper insights.  And thank you for all the good placenta-moving wishes!  I did some more research and 9 times out of 10 it moves and you can have a vaginal birth.  We are feeling much better about it now.  Still not sure about the Vegas trip though.  My doctor had to cancel yesterday and we saw an NP instead and she said she never tells people not to fly in this case but that we should go with what my doctor says.   

[Sphinxy]

Thanks, planet, for the reminder about the diaper service option! I totally forgot that there is a popular one in my area that I wanted to check out. I am having a hard time with the financial math - can I ask how much you pay per week or month? PM me if you'd rather. Also I have no concept for what a typical family would go through in disposables per week for comparison. I'm guessing if I google it, there's a site for that...

I hope you get to go on your trip, pokey! When will they check you again, and how long does it typically take to move for those 9 out of 10 women I wonder?

[outdoorsy]

Watched this video series on cloth diapering and it was very informative. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gVo6SMebcX8

[pokeyAC]

outdoorsy--I forgot to say how great it is that your tests results came back great!  After all that waiting, it must be nice to just get on with being pregnant.

sphinxy--I'm not sure how long it takes to move, but they said they would recheck at about 28 weeks.  That is the week we have the trip scheduled so I need to find out exactly when I can have the ultrasound and if we should just change our plans now.  It sounds like the concern is that I be near a medical facility in case something happens and I need to get there quickly.  They don't have Kaiser in Vegas but there are lots of places in California where we could go.

[seraf]

Haha, I think Jaimee's videos are awesome, and mine are the opposite of hers since our only overlap was the prefold.

[esenbee2]

outdoorsy -wow in video series! Thanks for posting it! Very informative!

AFM -our house guests are currently going through a break-up spat, with the usual lesbian drama, lol! This has actually helped me out because DSp now has a very sour attitude toward our friend's ex-girlfriend and is not happy about her still being in the house, which is how I have felt all along, but now DSp has the same feelings as me now and we are re-bonding over it!

Also, I found out this morning that our good (straight) friends are expecting a baby as well! We haven't talked in a while and plans to hang out seemed to have fallen through lately. It was nice to touch base with them, even if it was just through text. She is about 7 weeks ahead of me, so we're pretty close in gestation. Hope this will lead to us being closer friends because I really need more girl time in my life!

[planet]

Sphinxy, it's $20/week for the service. For us, since we barely have time to cook dinner or get anything else done, including our regular laundry loads, it is totally worth it. No extra laundry! We just put all the dirty diapers in the bag they give us, leave it on the stoop once a week, and bam! A new bag of fresh, clean diapers appears like magic. They also provide a neat bin. I think it's pretty sweet! Especially since I happen to dislike doing laundry! ;-)

[bigfoot]

Cananny - awesome maternity shots! So glad you did that! 

Tigers - I LOL'ed at the sea mammal thing. Sorry to laugh at your pain. DW is already pretty uncomfortable, so it is hard to imagine at 28 weeks. Looking forward to your next belly shots!

Outdoorsy - yay on the genetic tests! We are trying to figure out which tests to take and it is tough to navigate.

Tourneymama - welcome! Are your teenagers excited about the baby? We have an only child teenager who is coming around to the idea, but was not thrilled at first. 

Carmen - 14 weeks! It seems like you are just flying through. I suppose it may not feel like it to you. 

Outdoorsy - I was a little unsure about washing cloth at home (I did diaper service years ago) until I watched my friend wash hers at home. It really isn't gross like I initially thought. Although diaper service is a good alternative as others have pointed out. I am currently feeling gung-ho about washing at home to save money with so many twin expenses. We'll see how we feel when we are actually do it!

Sphinxy - Are you almost 6 weeks? A lot of people say the symptoms start to really kick in mid week 6. I will answer for Mrs. since she is exhausted. The nausea continues to get worse, and we are just hoping our doctor is right about the 85% chance of it plateauing this week. The Unisom/B6 combo at bedtime is making mornings better, but evenings are pretty rough. She is keeping food down and managing to eat a decent amount. 

Planet - I used the very same diaper service when the 16 year-old was little! I am amazed that their prices have barely gone up at all!

AFU - had another ultrasound today! Both babies were very active and wiggly. We were happy to get a look at baby B today since he/she was barely visible last time. They are both measuring just over 10 weeks in size. The weekly ultrasounds are ridiculous but it has been a really cool experience to watch the change each week. They still look like gummy bears but a lot more bones are visible this week. We are starting to feel like this is really going to happen, for real even though our minds are still blown.

DW's uterus is the size of a small melon. Her abdomen really popped out and got a lot harder this week. Good thing we are telling people in about two weeks as I'm not sure we could hide it a whole lot longer. I went out of town for work this week and stopped at H&M and picked up some really cute maternity clothes for her. I also stopped at Lush for a bath bomb and massage bar, and the sales lady was a twin and told me all about how awesome it is to be a twin. Awww.

Oh, and we told the teenager about the twins! We kept slipping up in front of him so we decided to spill the beans before 12 weeks. The conversation went like this:

Me: so, we have to fess up to something.

Him: SIGH! It's a girl, isn't it?

Me: No, it's twins. But hey, there is like a 75% chance that one of the two will be a boy.

He took it really well and continues to warm up to the idea. Although, I'm not sure he paid a ton of attention since he is really fixated on picking out colleges and applying for grants.

[mrsandmrs]

^^^^ bigfoot spoils me.

[KnittingTigers]

Bigfoot, I am going to send you my DP's address so you can pass on some "how to pamper your preggie wife" reminders.

[outdoorsy]

A few more thoughts on cloth diapers!

After watching the videos, I thought pocket diapers were the best thing for us. But later, I wondered if all the separating, washing of covers (because the pee/poop goes directly on them), and re-stuffing of the absorbent pads wouldn't be just as much work as the pre-folds. Here's what I'm thinking on pros and cons:

Pocket diapers

Pros: One item to wrap around the baby instead of two (diaper and cover)

Cons: Washing two pieces for each diaper and restuffing them; more expensive (because each diaper is also a cover, and covers cost more)

Pre-folds

Pros: Fewer items to wash because cover doesn't get washed for every diaper; less expensive because you own half as many covers

Cons: Need to wrap and fasten two items (separate diaper and cover) -- BUT I read this morning that some people don't bother to fasten the diaper and just tuck the diaper into the cover and use them as one. Does that work without leaking?

(Also, we are likely to at least try the disposable liners to make poop removal easier.)

Does anyone have thoughts on how to balance these pros and cons? And what about the idea of not fastening the diaper under the cover?

Thanks!

[seraf]

Bigfoot, at for the neutral reaction to coming out to your teen about twins. And way to be an awesome partner.

Mrs, I hope that nausea settles down for you.

Outdoorsy, we were given 80+ pocket diapers. Soren is the 8th kid to use them. Approximately half needed their elastic replaced, so they were pretty darn durable. Generally I hear 2 kids is the limit. Stuffed pockets are really simple for daycare and people who struggle with the idea of stacking 2 parts and making sure the prefold is tucked inside the cover.

We use ours as a cover. Stuffing and unstuffing was not worthwhile for us. The mom who passed them to us quit using them because they gave her son a rash. Some kind of residue build up? I don't know, they don't bother our boys, but some kids have issues with synthetics and we put cotton between our boys and the fleece because we are too lazy to stuff and unstuff.

Almost every parent I've known IRL has simply trifolded a prefold in a cover. A few do the basic fold in that video. I've known at least 3 dozen cloth diaperers. 2 pin, a few snappy(d), 2 use(d) fitteds, all the rest don't bother to fasten the diaper under the cover. We don't bother. We only use covers when we go out and I'm phasing Shay out of diapers now. We use a belt at home, but that's more rare than pins.

Cons of a loose prefold in a cover, if the prefold sticks out anywhere, wetness can leak onto clothes. If the cover is loose, the prefold can shift around. Sometimes poop will get on the cover and you'll have to change it, too.

Pros, cheap, easy and the covers mead less laundering.

[outdoorsy]

Seraf, thank you for sharing your significant experience with this!

[planet]

On diapering: I think DP and I need to learn some new ways of folding the cloth diapers, because we have had awful luck with not fastening the diaper before putting the cover on. We use snappies and are happy with them. We've noticed lately that Wylie's diaper situation is affecting his ability to move add much as he wants to. He wants to grab his feet but can only do so when naked or wearing a sposie. So we give him lots of diaper fee time. Had anyone else noticed this about cloth diapers? We could probably fix this with some improved folding skills, right?

[seraf]

Outdoorsy, I'm just old and have lots of crunchy friends. I don't use the pockets right, but I'm impressed by how long they've held up.

Planet, yes. Ari could sit while naked at 5 months but not while diapered until 7! And we used very minimal diapers. We never had the foot problem, probably because we trifold (and our boys spend huge amounts of time in the buff-I frequently put pants on S just so I can take pictures). More bulk on the hips will impact leg mobility.

This is how S2 just fell asleep nursing. He has clearly retained flexibility in this diaper.

Where are you snappying his diaper? Low rise? Maybe if you did them more like grandpa pants he could have better range of motion?

[Tourneymama]

Bigfoot~Thanks for asking!! The 2 oldest (Boys who are 17 & 14) are cool with it, but I wouldn't say jumping up & down with excitement, so not sure if that is a boy thing or what, lol. DD who is 12, is over the moon happy! She kisses DWs belly 10 times a day and talks to the baby and says it is taking too long to get here etc...Ha ha ha! She will be an amazing big sis ;) I kind of think they boys are just reserved because of losing ther sister at 35 weeks and scared to get attached again until baby is here and safe. They all had a very rough depressing time after we lost DD in 2011. So it may just be that. Never seen a sibling as happy and anxious about it than DD though....Hope your teen comes around soon also. I think once baby gets here, it will be different for us all!

[Sphinxy]

Wow, bigfoot, you are good! DW was talking the other day about getting me a massage, but I wasn't sure if the detoxifying effects would be good for the baby - I wouldn't want to send a bunch of crap into my blood stream, you know? Her other idea was a pedicure which I am totally down with, haven't had one of those since my wedding! Yup, I'll be six weeks tomorrow.

Well, it appears that my symptoms arrived yesterday morning. I woke with a stomach ache but didn't really put 2+2 together until it happened again in the middle of the night last night. It's not nausea exactly, because I don't really feel like I will gag or vomit, but definitely what I would describe as more of a "sour stomach" that just ached. Ugh. I finally talked myself into a trip to the kitchen around 5am, and I mostly felt better after eating a granola bar. So it looks like I'll be keeping snacks in the nightstand! Also, my boobs are suddenly killing me. 

Well, we are finding Nemo today - it's started snowing already and the winds should be pretty nasty by the early afternoon. Predicting about 8-14" for our area, with "thunder snow" (?!?) and hurricane force wind gusts at times. I don't mind being snowed in, I just hope our electricity stays on!

[outdoorsy]

Sphinxy  - Whereabouts are you? I'm in SE Mass, and the forecast here is 12-18" for today and tomorrow, also with possible thundersnow! We have hauled plenty of firewood into the house.

[Sphinxy]

Outdoorsy, we are currently about 20 miles NW of NYC. I think we are switching over to some rain/wintery mix this afternoon, then back to snow overnight. Massachusetts will always be home, I was born there, DW and I met and married there, all my family is there, and so we hope to move back before this little munchkin arrives. Since I work from home though it all depends on DW's ability to secure a job up there... FX.