I am coming to you once again with a parenting issue, hoping you can provide some ideas on how to tackle this. My newly 9 year old girl has always had a bad temper and anger outbursts. She behaves very well at school and in public and saves her "best" for in the family home. I work nights full time and dh is in charge of getting the kids up and off to school. I have been hearing from dh how hard of a time he's having with her behavior, but did not get the full picture until I took off a week of vacation. She is very hard to get up in the morning and chooses this as a power struggle to kick, hit, and scream. Many attempts have been made to wake her up gently with hugs and soft touches, kisses, opening windows slowly, music, alarm clocks (her idea), and other such things. She reacts with violence and rage. When she's finally out of bed and running late, she will yell and slam the door over and over again. I think she knows that dh feels pressured to get her to school on time and takes advantage of this.
My 12 year old is also suffering. It's important for my 12 year old to not be tardy and to get good attendance. She wakes up early on her own and gets herself ready. She is frustrated when her sister delays this, and often dh has to drive the girls to school because they miss the bus due to 9yo's tantrums.
On weekends, totally different story. She will wake up happy. She loves school-- this is not the issue. She is upset when she has to miss school due to being sick.
I have threatened to put 9yo in the car and drive her there in her PJ's with a bag of clothes. I did this once with 12 year old and after that she got ready on time.
Since I do work long night hours I get interrupted in my precious sleep by the tantrums. She is later very sorry and feels bad about it and hugs me with tears in her eyes.
So any ideas?