Liv, how sweet
Welcome Kelly! Hoping you see that BFP in 2 days!
I had a major temp drop this morning. Anyone seen a fallback temp at 3dpo? In the past with anovulatory cycles, I would have more ewcm as my body geared up to try to ov again. So, I'm hoping this is a random outlier and I did in fact ov on cd15! Anyone have an opinion?
Kelly!! Hope your stay here is short and sweet.
Livnkades It is really hard when your dreams and plans don't match up identically. I'm not sure I am the best person to talk to about this, as it has been a many years long struggle for me, but I will share my story and hope it is a comfort.
Before my DH and I got married, we seriously discussed how many children we planned to have. He was content with none or just one. He explained that did not want more than one for sure. I had always envisioned having many children, 4 or 5, and was heartbroken by the thought of never having a child or only having one. I was clear with him that this was a deal breaker for me. I could not agree to marry him if he truly couldn't see having at least 2 children. He agreed, quite readily, and time went on. 6 years after first meeting and 4 years after getting married, DD was born. When I was ready to begin thinking about another, when DD was 2-3 years old, DH was clear he was not yet ready. As DD has always been high needs and DH was not able to be a true partner in our relationship or parenting (he works 12+ hours/day 6 or 7 days a week), I accepted this, for then. Unfortunately, not much changed.
Fast forward to about a year ago, I sat down with DH and laid it all out. I had so many reasons that having another child was not the best decision, reasons that are valid and rational (My 36th b'day was approaching, DH was 44; I work full time and really need to continue doing so; DD was 8 years old - Is that too far apart? How would she adjust?; and DD is healthy and well - Shouldn't that be enough?). The most compelling reason being that DH was still really not fully on board, he has so many reservations about a baby (financial topping the list). Despite all these reasons, I knew and know in my heart and soul that I want another child so deeply that it aches. I had hoped that my longing and desire to welcome a little one would override the doubt (DH's doubt really) and that it would just happen, there goes that magical thinking, right? And now, my DD is 9 years old. She is amazing and fantastic, spirited and full of energy, a real firecracker. She asks me nearly every day if I think we might have another baby, she wants to be a big sister so badly. DH has sort of gone along with my plans the previous 9 cycles, BDing without protection, but not really seeming invested or helpful when AF arrives.
But this past month, just before AF, I spotted for a few days and was sure it was AF coming. I was so sad and literally cried my heart out to him, telling him that as bizarre as it sounded, I felt like someone was missing from our family. I mean how can you miss someone you've never met? But I do! This seemed to genuinely strike a chord for him. And since then, he's agreed to jump in and be truly in the game. I still don't know if it will work out for us, there is a real and distinct possibility I've missed my window of opportunity. But knowing we are a team and partnered in this decision is such a relief! While I get what others are saying and I KNOW most men do not get the baby fever that is SO real for us, I don't know that remaining silent is the best plan. I know for me, I didn't talk about it and I struggled on my own the past 9 months obsessing here and feeling quite alone IRL. You are 50% of your relationship and should not have to push down your feelings, your desires, because they scare your DH. That said, Dakipode over in the Saner thread said something a few months back when I was really sad about this. The most difficult thing in any relationship is having faith and taking that leap of faith. Faith not just that you'll remain monogamous, but faith that it will be okay, faith that it will work out and faith that despite differences of opinion/experience/wants/needs, that you'll come to a place of understanding, common ground. I wish you much luck and hope you and your DH can come to a place of understanding that feels okay for both of you.
Mamacat Thank you!! I do love my job and my students are just amazing. I teach Health, which has to be the most fun subject ever!! We spend a lot of our time covering sex and sexuality and decision making around sexual activity. I tell my students (and their parents) constantly that I cannot and do not teach values, that comes from home, I teach them facts and challenge them to make the best decisions for themselves. I do hope I guide them toward a healthy understanding of their bodies, healthy relationships, and healthy attitudes toward sex/sexuality. I am amazed at how little many of them know about their bodies.
Katie Glad we're cycle buddies again I am not sure when I expect to Ovulate. My body seems to like to keep me guessing. Before I was paying as much attention, I had 27 day cycles, like clockwork. The past 9 cycles have all been so different!! Last month I O'd on CD 15 and had a 29 day cycle. The previous few cycles I O'd on CD 11-12 and had a 13 day LP for 24-25 day cycles. I *suspect* I'll O CD 13-14 this month, but we shall see! Last month was my longest ever cycle and longest LP since I've been charting. I am wondering if my B Complex supplement has helped! I am feeling good about continuing to temp and use OPKs. I did splurge and bought some FRER OPKs, had a coupon and they come with a "free" HPT to use along with my Wondfos this cycle.
Amy I am new to charting but I think you O'd on CD 15 and will probably see your temp return, rise, to LP levels tomorrow. to you!!
Fx to all of you in the TWW!!
AFM Had my CD 3 bloodwork yesterday. My one colleague who knows I am TTC got all excited when I told her I had to go for bloodwork yesterday morning during a freeblock. She thought I'd gotten a + HPT and was getting confirmation. She's so sweet! She's been really rooting for me. Hope everyone has a great day
You can get them on Ebay too Ladyelms http://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_trksid=p5197.m570.l1313&_nkw=wondfo&_sacat=0&_from=R40
I'm kind of wishing I would have tried the Shettles method. Just wanted to get pregnant the quickest way possible, but I'd love for DD to have a sister!
Thanks for looking at it mamacatsbaby! Yes, my cycles are consistently 26 days. No matter when I ovulate, my cycle stays at 26 days. I've had a very serious LPD (5-8 days long) for 9 months, followed by last month getting an 11-12 day LP. So I would be very happy if this cycle was a repeat of last month! My fear is if I didn't ov on cd15, then I would be out this month yet again. I weaned DS last month which I was assuming was the reason I had a normalish LP. Really hoping to keep that going! My CH was at 96.9 last month. I've just never had such an extreme dip at 3dpo before. I was early in temping this morning, but even after I got up I took my temp again and it was in the 96s! Hoping it's just an outlier and tomorrow will give me another high temp! I think I'll run out and grab some opk's today just to have extra confirmation the next couple of days.
Ladyelms According to websites where I've seen stats listed, Wondfos are as sensitive as FRERs. I've actually noticed that when someone has a posted a pic of a positive and uses both, the Wondfo positive looks much darker and decidedly positive. Here's a link to stats on pregnancy tests by brand. http://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/pregnancy-test/brands.php You can search your particular brand's sensitivity too, by looking at stats by DPO. So much info to keep the mind obsessing!
Mamacat Yes, marriage is indeed a marathon! I wholeheartedly agree with your comments over on the Saner thread re: Sex Ed, btw. I hated my own high school Health class, it was a ridiculous concoction of scarey photos and videos coupled with memorizing a bunch of diseases and body system information that was in no way meaningful to me. It went out of my head as soon as I left the classroom. I try very hard to teach my students information that is pertinent to their real lives, and to make it fun! I mean everyone talks about sex so much because it is fun, right? Sex Ed shouldn't be frightening.
Livnkades Sounds like a great plan. And obviously you're welcome to hang out here!! I do hope I didn't come off as preachy about being quiet. I just think as women, we often sacrifice our own wants and needs for the needs of our partner and family, to our own detriment. I am trying really, really hard to voice my needs and wants, to own them, and to not apologize for having them. I want my DD to see and remember examples of her powerful mama.
Blonhrt Still crossing fingers and toes for you!!
Ladyelms - top wondfo, bottom frer. 11 or 12 dpo here. The line on the Wondfo is actually easier to read. http://www.mothering.com/community/g/a/466604/january-2013-tww-thread/