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February TWW Thread - Page 31

post #601 of 654

i have a huge exam this week for A&P. my something special happens on Friday. See, on Friday March 1st at 8:19am, 13 yrs ago I delivered baby girl #1. She lives with my mom because school here is horrid so Im going to drive up and surprise her on her birthday :) I got her a killer present this year (Google HKC tablet) and can't wait to see her open it :) She's never actually asked for it, but I know she said she wanted one. 13 is a special number. more so than 16, IMO. So its a big deal. I just need to get through this exam and then Im good to go.

post #602 of 654
Oxford, I'm due Oct 8th smile.gif

Katie, so close to testing!! Good luck!!!

Sparkle, glad you got the ticker goin smile.gif it's fun seeing it progress!
post #603 of 654

Coming back after taking a week or so off... Just need to clear my head a bit after the suspense of last month's TWW, you know?


Oxford, etc -- I am in the "too much pressure" boat as far as DH goes. It stresses me out, because I feel guilty for "using" him for his baby batter, and then I feel all defensive and unsure... He's very much on board with making a baby (he was ready before me, and had actually been waiting for me to come around). Things just get weird when TTC time comes around, probably because I don't usually initiate things normally.


Anyway, I sent this text today: "I wanna make a baby with you but I feel like a stalker rapist person when it's time to try..." And he said, "Don't. I want your sex." So I said, "I both want and need yours. Every night for the next week or so."


So, message should be out there loud and clear, right?


As you learned in my above text, I will ovulate soon (probably in the next few days), so hopefully DH will get into the spirit of things and we'll have a real try going on this month.


Sparkle -- congrats on your +!


The rest of you, good luck and good vibes as we all try not to go crazy together!!

post #604 of 654
Primal, I love your approach. That is so straight forward and gives DH a choice.
I too don't instigate overtly very often and so he spots when I am pursuing him around the bedroom! With your approach you have been clear with him and put the choice back to him. Let us know how it goes.

I find not saying anything very frustrating as you can sit and watch the important days tick by if work schedules are tough. That makes me feel resentful towards him and he doesn't even know what he has done!!! :-( awful wife!!

Equally saying too much is tmi for men an I so did the right thing this month backing off an letting him make the moves.

Good luck with the full week BD. maybe we could have a new contender for Dahlia's title??
post #605 of 654
Hahaha there needs to be a championship belt.

Just fyi, I also laid on my back for 15-30mins each day right after sex. You know, to give the swimmers an assist. Lol
post #606 of 654

dahlia -- I do that, too! Need to make it count. And I don't think I'll ever beat your record. Last night was technically in our "go time" window, but he was so happy playing video games by himself, and it was his birthday, so I let him off the hook.


Oxford -- I don't want to turn something as awesome as sex into a chore, but your perspective changes a little when you're TTC. Right now I am working full time and taking 10 credit hours toward my BSN, and I still muster my BD energy at the end of the night! I'll let you know how this approach goes. If he chooses to avoid me, then at least he has all the relevant info.


You know, I never used to have so much trouble getting men to jump into bed with me! :-)


Going to stop by Dollar Tree to get more OPKs tonight. Last month I O'd at CD11 (I'm a short cycler), which is three days away right now. (GO GO GO! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!!)

post #607 of 654

Just wanted to apologize to everyone who took the time to reply to me, (and a lot of you did, and it was a huge pick-me-up, believe it!) because I have not yet replied to each of you, personally. Had a major nasty migraine for the second time in 3 days, and just wasn't able. But I will.


Marquess, I am so sorry you are in such terrible limbo, but if misery loves company, we should be soul sisters. 

My AF is 6 days late now, and I have darkened nipples and leukorrhea and closed cervix, but no other symptoms (or hard to tell b/c my DD had a nausea/fatigue illness just today and my exhaustion by noon could be illness or anything), and nothing but BFNs as of yesterday (or did I test this morning? I forget, I have done it so many times).



I'm coming to peace with not testing anymore. I started to feel like good ol' Charlie Brown, always falling for Lucy's trick with the ball.


Was driving last night, gazed at the lovely full moon and thought that by the dark of the moon, I will know. And this peace came over me, and the thought "My body is doing just what it is supposed to be doing." (either way)

And then a bit later, felt pretty joyous, and the thought just sort of filled my mind "Life is a gift. Life is magical. Enjoy it!"


And so far, I do feel peaceful, and don't wrestle with the urge to go get some more $ store tests.

Once I accepted that there IS going to be an answer eventually whether I struggle futilely after it or not, I no longer felt the urgency to have that answer immediately. It sort of released me. 


Just shared this in case it's at all helpful. It helped me immensely. 

post #608 of 654
I just had to share some good news that a friend just shared with me.

After years of TTC and running the whole gamut of fertility treatments, including IVF with failed transfers, she found out she is pregnant with a surprise baby! She's 12 weeks and still can't believe it. I am so, so happy for her and her husband! It couldn't have happened to a nicer couple. It reminds me that the unexpected can and does happen. smile.gif
post #609 of 654

Today's tests :-)



My Wondfo's for the last three days (all FMU) - I love seeing the progression!



hCG yesterday: 7

hCG today: 17


Doubling time = 18.75 hours!  The #s are low (but fall within the normal range for approx 15 DPO) but I'm amazed at how quickly it doubled.  I hope to get another blood draw done again tomorrow morning if the weather cooperates (my doctor wants to follow the #s closely to make sure it's not ectopic because of how low the #s are).


The best part: no spotting, not a single drop (knock on wood, it stays that way!).  I'm having weird cramps, like my uterus is stretching quickly, and they are quite uncomfortable at times.  I'm semi-nauseous and my BBS (not just my nips) are tender.  All good signs, I hope :-)

post #610 of 654

Yay AKK!! It sounds like your doctor is really caring and on top of everything! That's great :) I"m soo excited for you! I can't remember if you said it already, but what's your estimated due date?

post #611 of 654
Holy crap. So much for my testing resolve. I knew something was up. So much for my concentration for my exam tomorrow!!!

post #612 of 654

Wow, Kate, that's amazing!!! I'm so excited for you!  Congratulations!!!

post #613 of 654
Crunchy- that's a great resolve to your TWW stresses smile.gif

AKK- those look great! I hope your doctors appts keep going well!

Katie- AHHHHH!!!!! Congrats!!! So happy for you!

So today my nipples are sore beyond belief. I haven't been taking my mucinex at all and still having copious amounts of CM. it's still so close to when I Od (4 DPO) that I'm sure it's just post O symptoms. Definitely makes symptom spotting so much worse lol
post #614 of 654
Oh also Katie it is crazy but I can totally see the line more clearly on the wondfos than the FRER!
post #615 of 654
Thanks girls!! I know, the line is definitely
There on the frer but didn't photograph well and the wondofos are definitely stronger. I feel like these are good for 10dpo. Oh I hope this babe is sticky!!
post #616 of 654

i feel like i just need to come to terms with the fact that i am not pregnant.


pregnant people get REAL positive pregnancy tests, not positive then negative then positive and so on. Ive been pregnant before, and I had lots of positive tests...consistent, progressing positives. i am doing this to myself. I dont have to take the tests. No one pees on them for me. There's no gun to my head making me do it. I do it all on my own. And no matter what, I would "know" if I was pregnant. The only time I didn't feel that way was when I found out I was having DD#1. I had no clue, I was totally floored when I found out about her. I had taken 2 hpt the same day, both negative. Hours later I found out I was pregnant. When I went for my first visit I discovered I was already over 10 weeks. But I've been pregnant many times since then, and I knew it from the beginning. I dont care how convincing my symptoms are. Im not feeling it. I have wondfo's coming, they should be here tomorrow or Thursday. I don't want to torture myself anymore though. So no more testing. AF will come or she wont.


Dr text me today. I need a repeat ultrasound next week to monitor my cyst and the fluid in my uterus. I havent had any spotting since Sat, but tonight I had a tiny bit of pink mixed in with the copious amounts of CM I have. 4 days ago, my CM went all wonky. Its EWCM, but thicker. Its so heavy I have to wear a panty liner. Its kinda gross and makes it impossible to conserve TP (Im trying to be funny...but its so true).


Oh, and sad face, I was wrong about my appt. Its not the 4th its the 8th. Ive been so emotionally challenged this week. Angry and sad, disappointed and elated. This has reminded me of why we took so many breaks when we were TTC all those years. Stupid things make me cry. Dance Mom's. Yeah, Dance Mom's. Katy Perry songs. Yeah them too. Hormones suck.


I am going to get a referral to my RE so that my cycles can be followed at least. We wont be doing any treatments beyond meds. I will be lucky to get DH to gie up another sample. I get to do all the hard work again. I also think we need to decide how long we will try this time. I will be 35 in Sept. Once upon a time I said no pregnancies after that. That's the magic # where Dr's label you an "old" pregnant lady. I have enough issues with my Dr's partners the last thing I want is to have another label.


Anywho, thanks for allowing my emotional rant or whatever this was.

Congrats to all the real BFP. Happy 9 mths to you

post #617 of 654

marquess, hug2.gif  I'm so sorry you're going through all of this.  I hope you get some answers soon.

post #618 of 654
Originally Posted by marquess78 View Post

Anywho, thanks for allowing my emotional rant or whatever this was.
Congrats to all the real BFP. Happy 9 mths to you

I am so sorry you are going through such a difficult time! TTC should be a joyous experience but often time the stress overshadows that joy. I hope you get your much needed answers very soon!
Originally Posted by katiecornflakes View Post

Holy crap. So much for my testing resolve. I knew something was up. So much for my concentration for my exam tomorrow!!!


Awesome news! I am so excited for you!
post #619 of 654
Hugs Marquess. TTC is such a terrible roller coaster.
post #620 of 654
Also hugs, crunchy. So glad you've found a peaceful place. smile.gif
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