Anyone hoping to go "late?" - Page 2 « Back to Group Discussions

[maydaymom10]

Buko - I'm right there with you. I'm "due" March 4 (we miss you over there, btw), but have it set in my head that this LO won't come until the 10th or so. DH signed up to run a half marathon on March 3, so we're both hoping that he'll get to do that. There's part of me that is ready to go (I'll be 37 weeks on Monday), but I've been so bad about getting things ready. I have all the supplies & necessities for our homebirth & for baby girl, but there is still so much to be done. Ugh. So I feel you. DS didn't come until 40+5, so I know I can handle it for a little while. Hang in there. 

[cortinacolorado]

I'm totally with you, Buko. While I'm super excited to meet this little being and definitely fantasizing about the day when I have abs again and can bend at the waist, I want her to go as long as she can in there. Of course I feel this way for developmental reasons, but even more so because my home is total chaos at the moment.

<warning: I feel a rant coming on...>

We rent a cottage on 2 acres and share the property with our landlords, whose home is also on the land. They're lovely, kind people...which is why I'm fighting as hard as I am to stay above the hormones right now. Several months back they came up with the fantastic idea to renovate our laundry room, which was really just a leaky, converted green house attached to the outside of our cottage. My partner and I were thrilled at the prospect, especially with a baby coming, but very clearly said that we'd need it to be done in plenty of time before the general 5-week EDD window. Well, I hit 37 weeks this past Monday and that morning guys showed up to start construction. Instead of reinforcing the existing structure, they decided to rip it down and build a fully insulated laundry from the new foundation up--which, again, is wonderfully generous and kind and...***Seriously??? You're just starting this now???***

We live in the country and are really lucky to have tons of windows from which to appreciate our amazing orchard and valley views. But since we're accustomed to being relatively alone here and since the windows themselves are oddly sized and shaped in this beautiful, artsy little cottage, we don't have many actual window coverings. I also work from home, so I'm here all day long, big and pregnant and feeling insular and protective of my space, with hammering and sawing going on nonstop and no place to go where someone can't just look in at any moment and see what I'm doing. I can hear every word the guys say, which means that they can hear me, too....

But wait, there's more: it follows common logic that, during construction, we don't have access to our washer or dryer. "No problem," said the truly lovely, kind, generous landlords for whom we really are very grateful, "just use ours." It wasn't an ideal situation, but I figured as long as we have our own machines back by the time I'm washing poopy diapers it should be fine. But what the landlords forgot to mention to us is that they are renting out their home to airbnb guests for the next 4 weekends in a row (which they do from time to time, to make extra money for a big trip they want to take this summer). So we don't really have access to their washer/dryer after all, the nearest laundromat is about 4 miles away, and in addition to (also very nice) construction guys, there are also going to be a string of complete strangers hanging out and wandering the property. This weekend's people are already here and about an hour ago I was trying to get some work done when I heard a couple of kids outside chasing after and yelling at my dog. I went to see what was going on, asked if he had done something wrong, and they just said, "No, but he's not supposed to be here. We threw a lemon at him and he stole it." WTF??? I assured them that yes, he is supposed to be here and he was just trying to play with them, but now I'm going to have to keep the dog in the house all weekend, too, because I don't feel like he's necessarily safe, especially considering the fact that these charming kids' parents also left the gate standing wide open.

Amidst all of this I can't help feeling terrified that I'm going to go into labor and have no privacy whatsoever, which is the last thing on earth that we ever wanted or had planned. I'm trying not to panic or burst into tears right now. Please stay inside for a few more weeks, baby!

[buko]

Okay, Cortina, you take the prize! Here's hoping your LO stays in until at LEAST 40 weeks!

[cortinacolorado]

Originally Posted by buko 

Okay, Cortina, you take the prize! Here's hoping your LO stays in until at LEAST 40 weeks!

LOL...and I never win anything! LO can definitely stay in the until at least 40wks, thanks, and I don't want to sound ungrateful, but can I give the rest of the prize back?? 

[kellybeth]

thinking of you cortinacolorado. i hope the reno/revamp goes by fast and that baby stays in there and cooks through it all. 

[typebug]

Cortinacolorado, lets just pretend we're not pregnant and I'm pouring you a drink. That sounds like a rough situation. I hope it all works out.

[josie423]

I am not hoping to go late, but I understand why some of you ladies are. *Hugs*

[Sunshine_Amy]

Buko, I hope you get your 1-2 weeks of totally bored down time!!  You've had so much going on. I totally understand your wanting to go late! 

CortinaColorado, so sorry for your loss of privacy. Maybe some sheets tacked over the windows, and some ambient music might help give you more sense of space?  I feel for you!  I hope you get your sense of space and peaceful dwelling back soon!

[sgsnyder]

Just adding to the baby-stay-in wishes for you, cortinacolorado. I second the improvised drapes and music-playing ideas. Feeling invaded upon, especially right now, is just not okay. <3 I hope your doggy is the mellow sort...

And for you, too, buko! I'd have totally lost it with my DH if he pulled that act. At least there's a chance that cops would be a little more understanding if you're driving to give birth, especially if you've done whatever paperwork you can at this point.

I'm definitely okay with going 'late'. In fact, I've had it in my head since the beginning that I'll go 'til 42 weeks (and have four days of active labor!) so I'd actually be surprised if my body starts to do anything very laborish before 40 weeks. That said: like you, buko, the alternative has started to dawn on me and I have this horrible realization that I'm SO not ready for her to come now (at 38+5) and I'd better get my overworked butt into gear. This weekend has been a blessing, since we hadn't scheduled anything (!) and I spent yesterday 1) lounging and 2) nesting, and plan to do the same today. Maybe I'll feel a little more accepting of the possibility of 'early' labor by Monday... but honestly, I'd really like to get in to the chiro first (my appt isn't until Wednesday, and I scheduled it a week and a half ago, AND they knew I was due the 19th) to get my hips and pelvis into position. They feel wonky, plus I have two squished disks that have been flaring up for weeks, so I don't feel very confident about my body's ability to labor and give birth effectively without a dramatic adjustment.

I have some magical thinking that if I delay finishing all of my 'to-dos', she'll wait. But HANG ON. That is magical thinking! Magic doesn't actually exist, right? I know there was a to-do thread somewhere, but I'm going to ask for forgiveness and just post mine here:

- Finish physical house-nesting stuff

(DH to assemble crib, minus one long side, and butt it up against our bed. He bought the (previously missing) new hardware, so there's some forward movement!)

(Wash the ever-increasing pile of newborn clothes, blankets, diapers, etc)

(DH to finish installing old wine crates on walls of her room as shelves to hold aforementioned diapers and clothes)

(Not as crucial, but would ease my mind: We moved in around Halloween and haven't done much in terms of finding real homes for things. I did the coat closet, the bookshelf, the laundry closet, and the bathroom cabinet yesterday, and I'd like to also complete the pantry, the desk 'nook', and our crazy clothing situation. I'm okay with not having the basement storage cube handled, though it's been nagging me for months!)

- Make a vat of vegan chili, some hummus, and maybe some quickbreads (nice for guests, and I might be wanting some sugary comfort PP)

- Thrift a used flannel sheet or two, and make wipes

- Improvise some PP pads (any ideas here? I can't afford GladRags or LunaPads, and I'm stubbornly resistant to buying disposables... I was tempted to just use prefolds for myself. Any experience with that?)

- Uh, paperwork!

(Print helpful labor-specific pages from childbirth educator, and yoga teacher, and Hypnobabies friend, and bookmarks)

(Send in forms for Medicaid)

(Start shower thank-you notes, if I really get that far; I'm super resentful about this one because I 1) didn't want a shower, 2) didn't want stuff I didn't choose 3) didn't want NEW stuff. And I'm really bad about sending thank-you notes in general anyway; they make me all guilty... I know, I sound like a total brat! I don't like excess stuff, and I have a huge aversion to new baby things when there are so many great used alternatives... yes, still bratty.)

- Install carseat (it came! it's cute! i think it'll fit in our tiny cars!)

- Pick up intravenous abx for labor

- Pack bag for birthing center

... I know there's plenty more, but it feels good to get that much written down. Anyway, I kind of feel like all of this is necessary stuff to finish before I go into labor, so I reeeally hope she hangs on. We should be able to finish most of it this week, barring any disasters at work or more illnesses. I hope. I hope.

(Edited 2/13: Making progress! I was given an unexpected day off (kid charges are puking) so I'm just about to get going on the rest of the list!)

Edited by sgsnyder - 2/13/13 at 5:40am

[cortinacolorado]

Thanks, everyone, for the support. I'm feeling a lot less panicked by the whole construction zone thing after getting to vent about it and have my concerns validated. For now I'm just trying to keep a sense of humor about it all and focus on the fact that actually having this new and improved laundry room is going to be a major plus for our family. In any case, my stressing out isn't going to help matters any. Meanwhile, baby's still hanging out (seemingly) comfortably on the inside, which suits me just fine even though I'm eager to meet her.

sgsnyder, good luck with all of your projects!

[Amor Rays]

Prefolds are good for pp pads, just fold them over a couple more times.  They will be really bunchy but will work.

[sgsnyder]

Originally Posted by cortinacolorado 

Thanks, everyone, for the support. I'm feeling a lot less panicked by the whole construction zone thing after getting to vent about it and have my concerns validated. For now I'm just trying to keep a sense of humor about it all and focus on the fact that actually having this new and improved laundry room is going to be a major plus for our family. In any case, my stressing out isn't going to help matters any. Meanwhile, baby's still hanging out (seemingly) comfortably on the inside, which suits me just fine even though I'm eager to meet her.

sgsnyder, good luck with all of your projects!

Phew. Humor helps so much! I haven't seen a birth announcement from you, so I'm hoping that she's still comfy to wait until you feel safe and ready.

Originally Posted by Amor Rays 

Prefolds are good for pp pads, just fold them over a couple more times.  They will be really bunchy but will work.

Thanks! I don't plan on moving around too much, so I'm happy to give them a try.

[buko]

Argh!  Good news and bad news.

Good news: DH got his temporary papers yesterday, about a week earlier than promised, so he's going to the DMV today when it opens and should have his license.  Only 5-6 days driving on an expired one.  Phew!

Bad news: His Green Card hearing (totally just a formality, NBD) is scheduled for February 28 at 3 pm.  I'm "due" ~March 1.  So, okay, I PROBABLY won't be in labor on Feb 28, but I figure, statistically, there's a good 5-10% chance of it.  My 24-y-o brother (who lives with us), said, totally innocently, "Well, labor lasts hours, doesn't it?"  I gave him The Look.  "Yeah, that's true.  I mean, DH is just going to be pacing the waiting room and cigar-shopping for most of it.  So he can duck out for a couple."  

I mean, really!

We have to have some sort of back-up plan, because I know DH-- he would risk being deported not to leave my side in labor, and you think that wouldn't stress me out?!  I just need to know there's SOME sort of back-up plan. 

I see on the form a place to reschedule the appointment, but putting it off until later isn't exactly better.  I mean, if THEY choose the date, it could be a week later, which would actually probably be worse.  A month later would be fine, but then again, he's walking around with a technically-expired GC that much longer (though if it ever came up-- which I don't think it EVER has in 20+ years-- he has proof he's in the process of renewing it).     

I feel he should have some proxy to run to the appointment if necessary and plead his case.  He could Skype from the birth tub to show, hey, my wife really is in labor!  The best person to go would be his brother, who lives about 30 minutes from here and is A) a US citizen, B) a lawyer and C) a Major in the US Army.  Of course, there are major shame issues in his family, so IDK how DH would take to that suggestion, but hey...