*~*~*~*Spotlight on scruffytoo!!!*~*~*~* « Back to Group Discussions

[jodieanneanton]

Ask away!!!

[babytoes]

Being your first baby, what sort of things are you feeling? Is there anything that's making you nervous, or are you totally prepared and ready to get the show on the road?

[scruffy too]

What sort of things am I feeling....????  A lot!!  I think most of it is an over-awareness of how much my life will change.  I just got my head wrapped around being pregnant (not that it was an accident) and now I'm struggling to wrap my head around a little creature needing me 24/7 for the next few years (and obviously beyond, but to a lesser extent.)  I find that very heavy.  Perhaps I do too much thinking. 

I am most certainly NOT ready to "get this show on the road."  LOL!  I'm fine with going late, I feel great for the most part, and am happy to ride this out as long as the baby wants to hang out inside me.

I'm not really "nervous" about anything.  Just the whole "unknown" thing...  It's been a decade since I've been around babies, and I don't really know what I'll DO with this one... 

[spughy]

Have you always lived in the North, or did you grow up somewhere else?  What do you like about life in the North and do you ever daydream about living somewhere else - and if so, where?

[scruffy too]

I grew up in Northern BC (Dawson Creek).  My dad was born and raised in that area, too.  I went South to Prince George for University and came up here with my English Degree (lots of us around this DDC!!)  I've been in the Yukon for 9.5 years and love it.  My only complaint is the gardening season is so short, but I make the best of it. 

My favorite things are the people that are attracted to Northern living.  I live 45 minutes out of town in an AWESOME community (Marsh Lk) and I couldn't see living anywhere else.  Everyone is so crazy and great to be around.  So much positive energy.  We have huge parties every weekend.  Everyone has an open door policy, I just love it.  If you need anything, you have 10 people fighting with each other trying to help you out. 

If I ever moved, I think I'd like to live on one of the Islands off Vancouver Island.  Or in Jamaica.  I don't really like it too hot, though...  And I don't like lots of people around - hence moving to the Yukon and not even living in the capitol.  But I love water (I currently live on the water) so if I ever moved, I'd imagine it would have to be on the water, too.

[jodieanneanton]

What prep are you doing for your labor/birth?  

How is DH handling the coming changes?

[scruffy too]

Birth prep - I'm constantly telling myself that I was made for this.  I've read tons of books.  I was hoping to get into Hypnobabies, and it's ok, but any time I try to slow down my breathing that much, I get panicked.  I can self-hypnotize without breathing so slowly, so hopefully I'll be able to tap into some of that when it's time to birth. 

As for the birth, I go between "I've studied for this, I'm made for this, bring it on" to "Oh my gosh, why do I think I can do this at home??"  Just depends on my mood.

DP is excited.  Much less supportive than I would have thought.  (I was dreaming of nightly back rubs, when I finally get a quick one, he says, "wow, dry skin, you should think about some moisturizer..."  Um, really, it's my BACK!!!  I can't reach!!!)  He also thinks I'm leaving him out of things, which is frustrating, because I certainly don't feel that I am.  He didn't read his books which really made me mad.  He thinks because he's done this before, he's all set (it was 8 years ago, hospital setting and ended in a c-section...)  He also gets hurt when he hears me say that I'll probably feel like locking myself in the bathroom and not coming out until I've had the baby.  So that's frustrating for me, because when I finally do express my concerns/fears, he gets frustrated.  So, yeah, lots of frustrating in the house - LOL.

[cocoanib]

Hi Scruffy too!

Do you and DH have a number of kids in mind or are you just waiting and seeing until after this one?

[scruffy too]

I've said quite a few times that I'll see how I like being a mom, first.  DP then points out that I'm already a great mom.  Ideally, I think I'd like this LO to have a sibling to play with.  My brother and I were really close growing up and I couldn't imagine not having him around (we're 22 months apart). 

[Chapsie]

How did you get into your career?  How are things going at work?  Do you plan on going back full time/ part time/ not at all after baby is here?  Are you still able to use and enjoy your English degree?  

[jodieanneanton]

Scruffy!  Your body was made for it!  I am sure you will do great!

What do you like to grow in your garden?  Do you ever do any winter crops?  :D

[Chapsie]

Originally Posted by scruffy too 

I've said quite a few times that I'll see how I like being a mom, first.  DP then points out that I'm already a great mom.  Ideally, I think I'd like this LO to have a sibling to play with.  My brother and I were really close growing up and I couldn't imagine not having him around (we're 22 months apart). 

My first two kiddos are 22 months apart (boy and girl).  It is so encouraging to hear how close you and your brother were growing up!  Are you still pretty close?  

[sunshinelove]

What do you wish for in regards to your child's life? Besides the basics of being happy and healthy of course

[GranolaMama09]

Even though this is my second DP and I still have those moments! Honestly, because his son is 8 and my daughter is only 3 he'll always have been there first. *eye roll* You are not alone in the mini freak outs! You can do this mama and I'm sure you will positively rock it!
Have you and DH decided the last name issue? You and your Dad seem really close, are you hoping if you have a girl she has the same with DP? (OK that came out a little wonky so I hope you underst.)

[scruffy too]

Originally Posted by jodieanneanton 

What do you like to grow in your garden?  Do you ever do any winter crops?  :D

I don't do winter crops.  I have, in the past, grown beans in the house over winter, and some herbs, and I usually bring some tomatoes in (the ones in pots) so I have fresh tomatoes until Christmas.  I grow lots of lettuce, spinach, kale, cauliflower, peas, carrots, potatoes, zucchinis, spaghetti squashes, radishes, parsnips, rhubarb (weed) and raspberries.  In the greenhouse I grow tomatoes and cucumbers.  I try to grow a bit of everything, but our "frost free" days are quite minimal (around 82 days) so that puts limits on what works well.

[scruffy too]

Chapsie - my brother and I were really close up until a few years ago.  When I moved here, he came up for his university summers (4 months) and lived with me, 3 summers in a row, before moving here for good.  He's still in the territory, although we haven't lived together for 4 years, but we don't see each other as much any more.  I'm hoping that will change with the baby.  His best friend wrote him a long email last week, describing her experiences with being a new Aunt, and how unexpectedly life changing it was for her.  So I'm hoping the seed has been planted for how he'll feel being an Uncle.  It's not that we had a falling out or anything, he is very busy with work and his social life and spends any remaining time on long hikes.  I really couldn't even imagine the last 30 years without him (he just turned 30 last month!)

[scruffy too]

Originally Posted by sunshinelove 

What do you wish for in regards to your child's life? Besides the basics of being happy and healthy of course

Happy and healthy for sure. 

After that, probably the confidence to chase whatever wild dream they come up with. 

The belief that they can go try anything. 

A respect for nature and a love for water. 

I haven't thought too much about that.  I'm sure once the LO is here, I'll be filled with hopes and dreams, but right now I'm focusing on a safe entry into this world and that they're sleepy at night...

[scruffy too]

Originally Posted by GranolaMama09 

Even though this is my second DP and I still have those moments! Honestly, because his son is 8 and my daughter is only 3 he'll always have been there first. *eye roll* You are not alone in the mini freak outs! You can do this mama and I'm sure you will positively rock it!
Have you and DH decided the last name issue? You and your Dad seem really close, are you hoping if you have a girl she has the same with DP? (OK that came out a little wonky so I hope you underst.)

Thanks Granola!! 

We have not discussed names in months.  It's my goal for the week.  I don't know on whether to discuss the last name issue, or focus on the first name.  I think we'll tackle the first names first.  I just remembered that he's working security for the strippers coming to town all this week (in the evenings) and we will not get a change to discuss names, so I guess this will wait until next week. <sigh>

My dad and I are very close.  I hadn't even considered that if LO is a girl (fingers crossed - lol) that she may have as close of relationship with DP.  I think he would need to work on his patience and a couple other parenting techniques before that would even be possible...  The reason I'm close with my dad is because I completely trust him, he's steady as a rock, and I always know what to expect.  It might help that we're both introverts.  DP is an extreme extrovert, so I guess if LO is, too, they could forge quite a bond, but I would imagine it might be difficult if she is an introvert...  I'll certainly support all bonding with DP, regardless of the sex of the baby.

[chocolatechip]

Originally Posted by Chapsie 

How did you get into your career?  How are things going at work?  Do you plan on going back full time/ part time/ not at all after baby is here?  Are you still able to use and enjoy your English degree?  

I think these questions of Chapsie's got lost in the shuffle, and I'm curious about them too. 

I love how much you obviously love where you live. It sounds like it fits you perfectly! I've been to the Yukon once. My mom and brothers and I took the ferry up the Inside Passage, and then drove over to Whitehorse before driving back to California. Unfortunately, I immediately broke out in the chicken pox in Whitehorse (at 18 years old, UGH), so we ended up not spending much time there. It was pretty from the car windows, though, and the folks we were staying with when I broke out in chicken pox were super nice. 

[scruffy too]

Sorry Chapsie - C.Chip is right, I didn't see those questions.

I guess I got into Corrections via the RCMP.  My dad was RCMP for 27 years as a civilian member (911 dispatcher WAY before our area ever got 911 coverage.)  My second year of university, I applied for an office job with the RCMP (front desk, switch board operator, and stenographer).  They had wanted an Admin diploma and 5 years experience but I BS'd my way through the interview, saying I was my own secretary for school and kept myself on track, did volunteer note taking, etc...  They bought it and I was in.  The next year I trained to work in the RCMP cells (aka "drunk tank") and really enjoyed it.  I finished school and moved here.  Had a horrible retail job for 6 months, saw that the jail was hiring and the rest is history.  I'll have worked there for 9 years in May. 

I've worked in most positions, my substantive being Corrections Officer.  I've done Case Management, Programs, Manager for a year, Policy Review, and taught lots of internal classes to staff.  There's been a million ups and downs.  It's quite "clique-y" and LOTS of politics involved, lots of undermining, etc...  I don't think I'll go back.  I mean, on paper I'm planning on it, but I'll go back to work long enough to complete my end of the Mat Leave agreement (6 months, most of which I'll take vacation that I've saved for such a purpose.)  

The way I left this fall (with NO support after being assaulted) didn't really leave a great taste in my mouth.  It wasn't surprising, but kinda the straw that broke the camel's back.  There are parts that I'll miss - I'm not an adrenaline junkie by any means, but that level of excitement is pretty hard to find else where!  But I don't think I suit the job anymore.  I've changed and I know motherhood will change me even more.  It was hard enough leaving my little hippy home to go to work before, but now thinking of leaving a baby to go to a jail, I really can't see doing it.

In conclusion, I hope to be able to afford to stay at home for a few years.  We'll see.  The money is stupid money there, part of me thinks I'd be crazy to walk away from it, but we'll see where my priorities are in a year. 

Oh that English Degree...!!  Much to my mother's disappointment, I'm really not using it unless I'm reviewing Policy or something like that.  I remind her that "technically" I used it to get my foot in the door with the RCMP, which got me the experience I needed to land my current job...  Slightly convoluted, but it's how I justify it.  I focused on Canadian lit and First Nations lit, so my knowledge of the "greats" is horrible!  My brother (also has an English Degree, after listening to me say how awesome my classes were) uses his (he teaches at the College here) and he focused more on the grammar side / sentence structure, and the classics.  So despite having similar educations, our degrees are VERY different!!

C.Chip - sorry about your chicken pox while visiting the North, but you're right, the views are great from the window - LOL!  I would LOVE to take the Inside Passage trip!!!  I've had friends who've done it and they loved it.  Even taking the ferry to Juneau would be cool, and it's on my list.