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How did you decide where to have your baby?

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 
My second birth was high risk, so I had to have her in a hospital.

The first I also had in a hospital, but if I had to do it over again, I would have had her at home. I was worried about safety of hospital vs. homebirth, but I'm better educated now, and that pregnancy was low risk and the birth was easy so it would have been fine. The birth went well and was fairly natural, but you do give up some of that no matter what in a hospital, and the atmosphere is a bit chaotic and loud. I would have been more comfortable at home.

Where did you give birth and how did you choose?
post #2 of 14

First: Hospital. I didn't know there was any other way. Quick birth. No problems!

Second: Hospital. I thought about a midwife, but there wasn't one in my community and my first hospital birth was great, so another didn't bother me. I ended up 6 weeks early with a very, very sick baby who spent almost 4 weeks in the NICU at a hospital 1.5 hrs from where I delivered.

Third: Hospital (first surro-babe). We talked about a HB and IPs were very much wanting one also, but I was pregnant with twins which cannot legally be a hb in my state. I ended up losing one between 15-18 weeks, and needed follow-up until mid around 30w to be sure that things were going okay as I hadn't passed the lost baby. By then, we decided hospital was our best bet.

Fourth: Hospital (twins again!). Carried to term, huge babies, naturally delivered in the regular room not the OR.

Fifth: Hospital. Singleton. I now lived extremely rural. Closest medical care of any kind was basic ER 30 miles away and closest midwife or OB was 60-90 miles in the other direction.


All of the births were natural, drug-free, and at the hospital. I had great experiences each time. My fifth never left my sight, we coslept at the hospital, and they did delayed cord clamping, didn't bathe/weigh him until hours later when we were ready. Very respectful--especially considering that my doctor couldn't make it, and I met my delivering OB for the first time less than an hour before pushing him out.  


If I had it to choose again, I don't know if I would choose differently...I would defnitely love a homebirth I think! But, I don't know if that will be possible and transport of an hour or more (or a helicopter ride for an extreme emergency) just doesn't seem 'fun' in labor!

post #3 of 14

We've always lived pretty far out in the country so I have not felt that homebirth would be a comfortable option for me, where I live. I have had two natural hospital births that I have been very happy with and am currently planning a third hospital birth.

post #4 of 14

We found the most likely-seeming homebirth practice in our area to be intellectually disingenious and medically misinformed, and both of us found that very disturbing, so we chose a hospital. Since having my daughter I have read more on the safety of homebirth from a variety of sources and am glad I did not have one. I will plan hospital births in future as well. I think it is important to look at a variety of information and evaluate the trustworthiness of the sources when making a decision, not just look at that which supports the conclusion you want to be true.

post #5 of 14

I had my first in the hospital, didn't really know there were other options. It was a pretty routine hospital birth..Pitocin, epidural, etc.

2nd was at a freestanding birth center, I don't like hospitals and had learned more of my options to birth. 

I'm planning a homebirth for my 3rd due in April, I hated that car ride to the birth center while in labor, and think it would be easier to just stay home, plus I'm just not a person who likes to leave the house if I can help it haha. Seems like a good plan to just pop the baby out here and go to sleep after. In the case of a transfer I'm under 10 minutes away from two hospitals.

post #6 of 14

When I was in college a home birth midwife came to an early childhood education class and talked to us about home birth.  That same semester another professor told us about her home births.  A few years later when my friends started having babies, many of them were birthing at home.  I live in a super-crunchy place where it's really embraced.  When I got pregnant I met with a team of midwives that had been practicing for decades and just fell in love with them and felt very comfortable.  So mine were born at home. 

post #7 of 14
My first was in a hospital because it's what our insurance covered. It was a horrible experience that taught me that the money I spend on birthing is worth it. My other 2 babies were born at home, and I plan to have this babe at home as well.

If I could go back in time, i would absolutely have paid for the homebirth the first time!
post #8 of 14

Here's how I made my decision, and I think it's a great way to make your birthing plans.


1.  Write down everything you can think of that you want to happen as a result of the birth--everything that is important to you for both yourself and baby.  This includes things as extreme as "I am still alive" and "My baby doesn't have brain damage" and things of a lesser severity such as "Delivering the baby in the water" and "Having my own sheets."  Make a big long list of every possible birth-related thing you can think of that is important to you.


2.  Then, next to each item give it a score between 0-100.  0 meaning "this really is of no importance to me--why did I even write it" and 100 meaning "this absolutely positively must happen or the world will come to an end."


3.  Then, go back through the list and next to each item write where you feel that item is most likely to be successfully accomplished.  So, next to some you might write a home birth, next to some write a hospital, by some write unassisted childbirth, etc.  Use whatever the birthing options are for you and your situation.  Make sure each item has a location written next to it.


Then, look at your big 'ol list of important items, their numerical importance, and the locations where they are most likely to be accomplished.  For me--it made the decision pretty clear.


Everyone's list of items is different, everyone assigns different values to those items, and everyone has different opinions on where each item is most likely to happen.  The important think is to make it your own and have it based on your own experiences and judgment.


Good luck!

post #9 of 14

My first was hospital, I wanted to UC but labor was long and it was our first and we needed reassurance, I'd seen an OB prenatally so just went in.

Second at home, as we found the hospital a big hassle with very few positives when medical care wasn't really needed, so we hired a midwife.

Third at the midwife's house because no midwives here come to homebirths but this one was available with a space set aside at her house for births, would have stayed home without a mw but DH's comfort level was better with someone experienced present in case of trouble.

post #10 of 14

Before I got pregnant or even started trying to be pregnant, I did a lot of research about pregnancy and birth and heard about the chain of intervention. When I saw pictures of hospital births they looked somehow cold, impersonal and intimidating to me, whereas images of home births seemed much warmer and more humane. Add to that my not very pleasant past experiences with medical care and my success with lifestyle/home treatment of various medical woes, and before I got pregnant I was pretty sure I'd aim for a homebirth. My husband was open to it, but after watching the Business of Being Born and after I relayed to him some of the challenges we could face with a hospital birth (or even at the birth center we visited), we were both convinced this was our best option.


We had a wonderful homebirth that, despite a hemorrhage, turned out just fine. I'm happy with our choice and am planning another homebirth soon! 

post #11 of 14



First was a natural hospital birth but I wanted to have her at home so bad I was willing to UC. Dh wasn't.


Second. Homebirth.


Third Homebirth.


For us it's been a decision we felt was right but we do feel that there are conditions that warrant a hospital and while I might be disappointed, we'd be at the hospital should any complications arise.

post #12 of 14

I am scared of hospitals and their final authority over my body- but that is just me, and I am phobic about it. I knew a woman, a friend of my mother, who was paralyzed from the waist down by her epidural- which scared me into never getting one. Even though most nurses/doctors administer epidurals just fine, I still trust myself and my body more than trusting a stranger with a possibly shaky hand putting a huge needle in my spine. Just thinking about it makes my heart beat fast. For me, the hospital will be there for an emergency only.

I had my first son at a Birthing Center and my following sons were born at home. I, personally, would not have been able to have my first at home without *knowing* how I handle birth in general, and the Birthing Center allowed me to have that liberty of experiencing a natural birth without fear, bright lights and intervention even though they did have some odd rules. After birthing my first son naturally I knew my pain tolerance and confidence level. My home births went smoothly and I was very comfortable, I listened to Hypnobabies to aid in relaxation techniques. Every woman is different and not all can give birth at home, and just the same, not all can give birth in a hospital comfortably. To each their own.

post #13 of 14

I have 2 little ones and both were born at home. I knew before I was even pregnant with the first that I didn't want to have my babies in a hospital. Hospitals are for sick people, and a totally appropriate place for women with complicated pregnancies. (not that women with preg complications are sick) I have a good friend who is having a difficult pregnancy right now, and I'm very glad that she has doctors to take care of her and her baby. But I didn't want the type of care that hospitals and OBs provide. I don't think a hospital is necessarily safer since interventions, ones that can be very dangerous, are so frequent. Of course things happen during labor that one could not have predicted, but I believe a good midwife knows when to take you to the hospital. 


I disagree with the post about making a list and prioritizing the things that are important to you on a scale. Of course having a baby that is alive and doesn't have brain damage is more important to a woman than having a water birth. That is not a real comparison. Trusting and listening to your body can make birth safer for you and your baby. What you may be subjected to in a hospital could make birth less safe for you and your baby. Homebirth is not just about your experience, and I think people falsely present it this way as a argument against it.


But in the end you should birth your baby in the place that you feel most comfortable. I would not have been comfortable in a hospital. In fact I had quite a bit of anxiety about it when making a plan in case I had to transfer. And many women would not want to birth at home. Don't what feels right to you. 

post #14 of 14

oops replied to wrong thread.

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