1) I don't want to give birth again. I've done it twice, I know how it goes, I don't look forward to it.
2) I want this baby out asap so that I can begin the next phase of treating my other health issues...I'm in so much pain.
3) This is my last baby so I want to enjoy it and savor it, I know I'll miss being pregnant.
All these feelings are just conflicting me and making me decide not to feel anything which I hate. :( I'm not excited, I'm not glowing, nothing like that. I'm just tired and in pain and I know after the baby comes I'll still be tired and in pain. Sigh.