Chat Thread March 13-20 « Back to Group Discussions

[rachieface]

How is everyone this week? Typebug, we're thinking of you. Jenny, are you feeling any better? Teles, are the diet changes helping baby yet?

I've been lurking daily, but haven't had much time to post. Violet is doing great and such a joy. At 3.5 weeks (her one month appointment), she weighed in at 10 pounds 4 ounces. That means she's been gaining close to a pound a week. Loves her milk!

We've been getting a good 4ish hour stretch in her crib before she wakes in the evening and then DH brings her to bed with us, so I feel like I'm getting decent sleep. I could get better sleep though if I would go to bed at the same time as her!

Update us on your babe!

[Chloe'sMama]

Hi rach- nice to have you back!
we are doing pretty good here. Liam is 4.5 weeks old and I don't know his weight... have our next well baby visit at 6 weeks... doc said we didn't need to come in at a month sincenwe don't do the shots. He is sleeping pretty good most nights, or i :joyam sleeping through feedings, cant tell. He had a super bad diaper rash, yeast and all.... I have been using nystatin and chlortimazole for almost 3 weeks and still there are little pock marks.... the rash is so much better though, almost gone.

My girl are being handfulls, I am thinking dd1 is getting sick, she was really whiney. Dd2 is acting just as a 2.5 year old..... pushing boundaries and doing the exact opposite of what we ask.

Since my mom is gone the girls are back in our room.... dd1 moved to a twin across the room axmonth before ds was born and dd2 in in our bed. I love our family bed, I just wish dd1 could it too.

That is all with me.

[Brambleberry]

I've been checking in here and reading the posts regularly, but rarely have time or hands to type.  I'm having a rough time with the twins.  They're a month old now and still nurse every 2 hours and it takes at least 45 min to nurse and change both, so I get an hour and a quarter stretches in between - including at night.  DD1 is being a PITA.  Luckily she LOVES her sisters - but this is also problematic sometimes when she wants to hold them all the time - especially when I need to nurse.  Life is not fun right now, and I'm not seeing a light at the end of this tunnel any time soon.  On the upside, we've had LOTS of help.  Our church community is bringing us meals still - at least three times a week, and picking DD1 up for play dates twice a week.  DH is able to help out when necessary - he usually doesn't get outside to work until an hour after his regular start time, and is taking longer lunch breaks.  Which is all great for me, but not for the finances of course.  And my parents are next door and help a lot on weekends - mostly taking DD1.  

[Jenny01]

I just wanted to thank everyone who shared their experiences in the last thread. It helps to know I'm not alone and I think I am just too focused in being "perfect" and I know that is unrealistic with a newborn. It's still hard for me when she is upset and I just don't know what to do. We are also still working on sleeping and I'm not getting a ton but hopefully she gets used to her bassinet soon. I have it beside my bed and she is just very noisy and not a sound sleeper unless she is being held.

I'm still questioning my supply sometimes and am upping my fenugreek and blessed thistle again for my own peace of mind. She is slowly gaining weight just not as fast as "normal".

I have been feeling better the past few days after making more of an effort to get out with the help of my friend who is visiting. So I hope I will continue to feel better and get out of the funk I was in.

[MaybeJ]

Rach - great to hear from you!

Chloe's Mama - I'm glad to hear the rash is clearing up.  No fun!

Brambleberry - that sounds so hard.  We're having the same struggles with DD1 acting out and wanting to hold the baby all the time etc. so I can only imagine what that would be like with two babies.  Your hands are so full.  I'm glad you are getting a lot of help.

Jenny - so glad to hear you are getting out and feeling a little better.  DD1 and Isla were both very noisy sleepers in the first few weeks.  I'm happy to report that at 6 weeks, Isla is much less grunty in the night.  Here's hoping it will be the same for you and Clarissa!  Either way, it won't last forever, I promise!  My understanding is that if there doesn't seem to be any signs of discomfort (crying, screaming etc.) than the grunting is normal and just something the little ones will do for a little while.  I have a terrible time sleeping through the grunting noises as well.  Maybe some white noise for you and baby?

AFM, I also read fairly regularly on my phone but have so few minutes to actually get on my laptop to respond (I hate phone typing).  Things are going pretty well for us!!  We have some adjustment issues with our 2.5 year old but I feel those issues are just as much mine as hers!  I feel tired and lazy and therefore don't do as much with DD1 as I should.  She does well when I actually make the effort to take her to the park or the library but with it being so cold and wet and me being tired, we just don't do those things enough.  And then DD1 gets bored and acts out.  Hitting, not listening, actively resisting.  She's fairly gentle with the baby but does seem to want to poke her a lot while she's sleeping. :)  As for the little one - Isla sleeps great at night!  I don't mean to rub it in or anything but she is the polar opposite of DD1 when it comes to night time sleep so I'm pretty excited about this.  I'm still really tired because I've always required a lot of sleep and lack of sleep really effects my mood - but it could be so much worse! 

[Madeleine Bazar]

Hello everyone! I have been lurking as well,and so appreciate reading what everyone is going through. I had a beautiful baby boy (we didn't know the gender) on Feb 28th. He is two weeks old today. He was 6 lb 6 oz when he was born and weighed in at 7 lb 7 oz on Tuesday this week, so I am feeling very grateful breastfeeding is going so well. He was tongue tied and we damaged one of my nipples. We got the tongue tie clipped and things have improved but the nipple is still healing and hurts a lot when he first latches on. I have been relating a bit to jenny and her sleep issues. I got a cold the day I went into labor and it is still lingering probably because I have gotten only a few stretches of 3 hrs of sleep and mostly 1.5 hr stretches of sleep. My little guy wakes up every 1.5 to 3 hrsto feed all night and all day. I have tried pumping and having dh do a feed so I can sleep but I wake up when I hear lo cry so I don't really get anymore sleep.lo sleeps in my arms at my side at night and we have not mastered laying down while nursing, which might help.
When do you all change diapers at night? My guy poos every feed. We have been changing him in the middle of the feed so he wills fall back asleep nursing, but maybe I should just change it before the feed so there is less interruption?
I am going to try sleeping with him on my chest to see if that helps things.
So far I feel exhausted and like I don't know what to do with my newborn. He sleeps almost all day unless he is feeding. Should I try to keep him awake in the day time?
Thanks for any insight you may have!

[typebug]

Hi everyone, i was just discharged from the hospital today. I'm home, not able to walk or stand without help so everyone (my husband and parents) else is picking up my baby boy for me and rocking him when he wakes and doing diapers. It's pretty sweet to see my folks so engaged. Who knew they'd remeber so many baby soothing tricks.

I'm sore and feel like a deflated balloon. Actually i look like that too. I have managed to get a nipple into this little guy's mouth but he doesn't want to suck and isn't showing signs of being hungry yet. I tried to hand express a little to try to interest him in eating but i realized there was NOTHING there. I've been able to express colestrum for weeks. I think it must be the trauma my body has been through. My hemogloban when they discharged me was 7.5. I figure i have to build up my iron really fast or my body might not be able to feed this guy.

[cileag]

Little Willa is six weeks old today and we are doing very well.  I had a seizure after her birth and injured my shoulder,  so that part of the recovery has been challenging since it was in a sling for three weeks.  I struggled a lot with deciding whether or not to go on anti seizure medication and finally did two weeks ago.  Luckily, we've both been tolerating it well.  On the plus side, Willa is an extraordinarily easy baby and we've all been getting lots of sleep.  I really think they just come out one way or the other folks...my first was addicted to boob, nursed every 1–2 hours, this one sleeps in that bassinet for 3-6 hours at a time.  

 Type bug, you are pumping, right? With a hemoglobin of 7.5, you'll need extra fluids and I'd strongly recommend pumping after almost every daytime feeding if you can to get your milk supply up.  If you don't have access to a lactation consultant there, maybe a phone call to one to get a plan too?  Good luck!  

[Chloe'sMama]

Originally Posted by typebug 

Hi everyone, i was just discharged from the hospital today. I'm home, not able to walk or stand without help so everyone (my husband and parents) else is picking up my baby boy for me and rocking him when he wakes and doing diapers. It's pretty sweet to see my folks so engaged. Who knew they'd remeber so many baby soothing tricks.

I'm sore and feel like a deflated balloon. Actually i look like that too. I have managed to get a nipple into this little guy's mouth but he doesn't want to suck and isn't showing signs of being hungry yet. I tried to hand express a little to try to interest him in eating but i realized there was NOTHING there. I've been able to express colestrum for weeks. I think it must be the trauma my body has been through. My hemogloban when they discharged me was 7.5. I figure i have to build up my iron really fast or my body might not be able to feed this guy.

glad you are home typebug.  I am proud of you for taking it easy and hope you are resting as much as possible.  If you do it now, you will recover so so much faster.  I have heard RRL tea has lots of iron and will help with the bleeding too.  

We are doing well here.  I think the thrush is back, but can't tell and don't want to do gentian violet again till I know for sure.  My mom paid for someone to come clean the house 4 times and today is going to be the first day!  We also had a friend deliver food last night, so I am feeling so pampered.  

I went running on Wednesday and it felt so good!  I am a little sore, but my bleeding didn't pick up at all and I am thinking I am at the tail end of it.  Going to try and go again tonight.  I think I may be ready for DTD too.  Anyone try yet?  I am 5 weeks out tomorrow.

My birthday is Sunday and I am excited about just having a great weekend with my family.  I have made my requests known to DH and the weekend is all set!

How are all you mamas doing that this was your final baby?  I am trying to convince DH to at least keep the door open (no V yet...) he doesn't seem interested in talking about it.  Makes me SO sad to think about and I just want to sit and cry, but dont know if it is PP hormones or if it is that I actually want another baby super bad.  I don't feel sad except when I think about it, so I don't think I have PPD.  I did with DD2, I was so disconnected from baby and just felt so guilty for DD1.  Anyways, I am just rambling now.  

[loveandgarbage]

typebug I hope you feel better soon. Are you on a good iron supplement? I was in pretty rough shape postpartum and couldn't move around much (due to tearing) and it was both hard and nice to have other people taking care of Lou for me. It will get better.

Chloe'sMama this is our last baby and we're both okay with that. DH is going to go through with the V soonish. Although it is somewhat sad. I'm just soaking in all of these baby moments. It makes it all the more special knowing this is the last time we'll experience them.

We're still having some nursing issues over here, but are working with a great OT/LC to gently correct tongue-tie issues. I think we can avoid clipping. My nipples were doing better last week, but his latch got worse, and now I'm in a lot of pain again. He's definitely getting enough milk (is now 2+ pounds over birth weight at a month old) so at least he's not suffering. My crotch is still sore and Lou is waking up more at night, but those are my only complaints. My older kids have been mostly amazing since gaining a new brother. My 4 yr old (a former high needs and very attached baby/toddler) has had no jealousy issues and I'm amazed. But my 6 yr old has become more emotional and has acted out a little. He just doesn't deal well with change. But he's very sweet with Lou so that's wonderful.  

[odinsmama]

typebug - I second the recommendation to be pumping if you're not already.  If baby isn't latching and sending the signals to your body that you need to make milk, send the signals with the pump every couple of hours.  Even if you don't get anything out, keep sending the signals.  If you do start producing, you can give it to him in a syringe or dropper.  Keep resting, keep hydrated and keep eating.  Hang in there!

This is our last baby and I'm totally fine with that.  But when I'm in the newborn stages I never think about wanting another baby, so maybe I'll feel differently in a couple years.  It was a hard labor this time and pregnancy, while not terrible, was painful and not easy.  I'm not getting any younger.  We both feel good about being done with babies after this one.  DH will get a V at some point.

After 2 days of no dairy we had a slightly better night last night.  It's amazing what an extra hour of sleep can do.  We were in bed by 10:30 and her crying time was much less intense.  She woke a few minutes later and just nursed back to sleep, so I'm sure I was asleep by 11.  

She's still spitting up plenty (but gaining just fine) so I'm making an effort to wear her more instead of setting her down for naps and see if that helps.  I'm wearing the stretchy wrap for the first time today and will attempt to nurse with her in it.  

My older kids are doing okay.  They have always had good and bad days together where they'll fight more or bug each other more.  But baby and I are back in the family bed room now so I know they're waking earlier if she's fussing at 5:00 and they don't really go back to sleep after that.  DS2 is an early bird anyway and he wakes up talking non-stop and will wake DS1 who will be grouchy if he hasn't gotten enough sleep.  So we've had to do some earlier bed times with them to make up for it.  

I'm finally done with the seemingly endless spotting, so DH will be thrilled that we'll be able to make time to dtd this weekend.  I was feeling a little nervous about it and keep reminding him that he'll need to go slow.  But then I remembered that I only had pain with sex after my hospital birth, in which I was not allowed to be upright for pushing.  After DS2 I had no pain with sex so that very well may be the case this time, even though it was a much different labor.  We shall see.  

[typebug]

Thanks everyone! I had a milk donation from another mamma and we finger fed him a few drops which seems to have helped him get into gear. We had him latching at 9:30 today!

I'm doing major iron supplements and am eating beef for the first time in over 21 years. Feeling a little less light headed.

[kellybeth]

hey mamas, i have a question. naomi is almost a month old ( so unreal!) and i still feel very weird down below. the most alarming thing for me is that my anus is still numb. is that normal? i mean, i have absolutely zero feeling there, although it kills to have a BM, it's like the pushing stage of labor all over again. i hate it. 

tears are healing, though it all feels like a different vag now and makes me so sad. 

i've lost about 30 pounds doing nothing which is nice but still coping with my body. i drink about a gallon of water a day, it's crazy! i am always so thirsty, she's always eating.

i found a video on how to nurse a newborn in a ring sling so we're going to try the maya wrap again. i just hate how much fabric there is, i can't feel anything. it's not stretchy, it's thick hemp or something. blech

had a nervous breakdown over my clothing situation and stormed off to the store, leaving hubby alone with a sleeping baby. had a few more breakdowns on the way there/there/on way back thinking of her crying and how heartbreaking it is. failed mission and was gone for almost an hour b/c of terrible drivers. got back and baby girl was so happy to see mommy. she looked so distraught. daddy had used the milk in the freezer as well as in the fridge for her and she was still hungry. i felt like such a crappy mom. 

we have our 1 month appointment but we're selective/delayed vax so we won't be doing those, just weight and check up. she's losing all of her gorgeous auburn hair and it's coming in blonde like her daddy's. 

[Chloe'sMama]

Sorry Kellybeth, sounds like a rough day.  I can't say what is normal or not, but my tailbone still aches, my vagina feels pretty good, but I didn't tear this time.  I had stitches with both girls and it took a LONG time to feel back to normal.  DTD didn't happen till after 6 weeks with both of them because of how sore I still was down there.  I had a friend who had a 3rd degree tear and she felt super sore for at least 6 months and had a real problem DTD for a long time.  She is pregnant with her 2nd, so she must have worked it out eventually.  

I know what you mean about body image, it was really bad with #1, less with #2 and more again this time (as I think it most likely is our last and I want my body back).  Maybe if you start some type of physical activity, even walking or stretching.... I know it always helps with feeling good, even if my body isn't changing back.  I lost all of the weight and a little extra, but my belly is still so squishy and folds over my pants.  YUCK, feels awful.

Anyways, I can totally relate.  Hope you can find some way to feel better.

[rachieface]

Oh Kelly Beth, you are SO not a bad mom. In fact, you sound like a great mom....one who loves her baby and wants only the best for her. Please know that you are the perfect mother for Naomi. Choosing to leave her in the loving care of your DH for a very short time is not a bad mom thing to do. For next time, if you need to shop, maybe you could have both of them come so he could hold her while you shop and try things on? Not ideal, but it might make you feel less anxious because you'll be right there if she needs you.

[HouseofPeace]

kellybeth- that's so familiar except my babies never take bottles so hubby just texts 'are you on your way yet?  baby losing it' or something charming like that.  it's totally normal and not bad or unhealthy to feel like this, and you're an AMAZING mama.  sometimes even amazing mamas can have a meltdown or two.  don't know about the numbness at all, but it sounds horrible!

and i've got 4 boxes of clothes scattered around my room.  i put away my maternity clothes (they made me feel fatter and frumpier), no bras fit well, i'm still in giganto panties, and my middle is super squishy.  so no pants fit, all shirts look horrible over my deformed boobs, my butt has extra padding that makes it look weird to me, and if i wear skirts my thighs feel huge.  but i'm really not doing badly for only 5 weeks pp!!!  but i keep ALL my clothes in all sizes b/c of these stages.  i have really cute wrap dresses that are so helpful when i'm this shape, even though i feel frumpy, they don't look bad in pics when i look back.  two are black and white w/ patterns, and one is a solid black i wear over pants an other shirts.  i hate hate hate trying things on in dressing rooms when i already feel bad.  so i have pants in sizes 4-14, panties in sizes 5-9, bras in sizes 32DD-34H, and dresses from 6-14.  shirts all kinda range, so i don't even know those sizes.  but it saves me from shopping- even though sometimes i try on 7 different things before something fits.  then i try and nurse in it and it doesn't work and i'm back in there grumping about what to wear... hubby doesn't say too much on it- he knows it's thin ice!!!

started exercising last week- some glutes and core.  probably b/c of the above feeling!  off to do more now.  even if it's not making a visible change, i know it's not hurting.  my sister is pregnant and is so excited about her boobs, and i'm wishing i enjoyed having monster boobs, but they always make me feel fat and frumpy and all my clothes look bad until i get a good bra on.  and the two good bras i have are horrible to nurse in.  so i wear them out to look better, but then have a hard time nursing out.... so it's pretty annoying!!!

[kellybeth]

oy. baby girl decided 3 days ago that she doesn't want to nap during the day. it's awful. 

all aboard the fuss bus. 

she sleeps through the night except for a quick adjustment on the nipple no more than twice, and maybe a wet diaper change while she's sleepy and doesn't care.

i was wondering if any mamas have advice on maintaining baby finger nails? i feel awful that i have to keep little cuffed onesies on her or socks (haha!) since she constantly scratches herself or pokes her eyes out and then cries. she really hates having her hands covered but she hates having her nails trimmed even more. 

[buko]

My MWs suggested biting the fingernails off-- and it really works! I do it while she's nursing.

[Chloe'sMama]

Originally Posted by buko 

My MWs suggested biting the fingernails off-- and it really works! I do it while she's nursing.

This is what I do ans have done with all the kids.  works for us too!!!

[Jenny01]

We are on the fuss bus this week too. She sleeps slightly better at night but not by much. Seems extra gassy too. It's been a rough week I hope it's just a phase - growth spurt maybe since she's gained a lot this week.