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The great hormone upheaval

post #1 of 20
Thread Starter 
Anyone else?
I am normally luckily not a person that tends toward depression (I'm more of an anxiety kinda gal) but holy cow this week has been hard. I rarely cry out of self pity, but today... Today I am a whiny grumpy mess.

My DH reminded me that wisdom is knowing what part of the journey you're on, or in this case remembering what part you're on. Apparently I have been here before smile.gif
It must be the six month slump.
post #2 of 20
I'm super weepy too. Yesterday my toddler's diaper leaked on the new couch and I broke down crying. This morning she's been super whiny/unreasonable (as in wants water and doesn't want water at the same time) and despite my best efforts, I just curled up into a ball and cried. Luckily she asked to nurse and that calmed us both down eventually. The whole household has been sick on and off for a month, so we've been pretty cooped up in the house which is never good. I think this is part February/March blahs, part frustration and part pregnancy. All I know is I need warmth, sunshine and health! I'm not one with much of a green thumb but this year I hope to get some pots/planters and grow some herbs and maybe some strawberries and tomatoes or something (I welcome suggestions for what grows well in pots instead of in the ground). I just have this big pull to be outside since we've been stuck between four walls so much lately.
I don't remember feeling this isolated and sad when pregnant with DD but I was working at the time, could visit friends, walk the malls, etc. Also I was a lot further into the pregnancy and could see the light at the end of the tunnel. Big hugs, Wrenmoon. I know I can use some! We'll get through this somehow hug.gif
post #3 of 20
Skycheat: I wouldn't do strawberries because they don't produce much their first year. Stick with annuals. Determinant (Bush type) tomatoes grow well in a 5 gallon bucket size when the weather warms up. You could also do radishes, bok choi, lettuce, tom thumb carrots, Bush peas, bunching/green onions (good with carrots) and that is just for spring. I have had success with all of these in the window sil size containers (except tomatoes). For summer you would need larger 3 gallon rounds but you can grow Bush zucchini and cucumbers and Bush beans in the window containers. I guess it also depends on how much space you have/sun. I love container gardening smile.gif.

I feel the 6 month blahs coupled with the late/long winter blahs as well. I am so ready to get out and plant my spring veggies but the unseasonably cold weather and especially the wind have kept me out of my garden. I feel very grumpy.
post #4 of 20
Thanks talldarkeyes! I may have to try a little strawberry just because but I won't expect a big crop wink1.gif. Space is not an issue and we get a ton of sun, I just don't want to take away what little lawn space we have from DD. Plus in a pinch I can ask DH to put the pot on the picnic table on the deck instead of crouching/kneeling/bending to weed. Trying to be practical about that baby belly wink1.gif I do a few bulbs in the front and have a few lillies in the back for colour. I keep checking to see if the crocus' are coming up yet - that's my first real sign of spring smile.gif
post #5 of 20

I'm feeling it, too. I've been crying a lot this week, big cries over silly things that then evaporate pretty easily. We also got another 16" of snow at the beginning of the week, so my garden is still covered in waist-deep snow and it doesn't seem like it will *ever* melt.

 

I thought I was feeling bummed because winter does not seem to be ending, but I have never felt this way about it before -- reassuring to know that some of it might be pregnancy! My partner caught me sighing/frowning at the snowy yard this morning and said, "I thought you *liked* snow!" I usually do, but this winter seems especially tough. There's so much snow I can't even walk in the woods, which is what I often do when I'm feeling out of sorts. 

 

The lingering winter also makes the baby seem so far away/not part of reality, while I'm simultaneously finding it harder to do things/get up/bend over/reach into the washing machine, so I'm kind of freaking out that this semi-handicapped phase of pregnancy is going to go on forever.

 

Luckily I'm taking a trip down south to see my parents in a week, which should help. They have real spring and blooming things already :) 

post #6 of 20

skycheattraffic, I highly recommend Alpine strawberries if you can find them! They don't make many fruits per plant, and the berries are tiny, but the FLAVOR is incredible and it's something you can't get in stores. They also bear the first year and last longer as plants than regular strawberries do!

post #7 of 20
Thank you, Zeeohee! I'll look for them. I LOVE going to nurseries to see the seedlings/perennials/whatever even when I'm not planning on gardening. It will be very interesting with my two year old in tow, I'm sure the excursion will be narrated with lots of "pretty flower" and "BIG tree, tiny tree!" wink1.gif
post #8 of 20
I've been a total mess too. Not as much crying as before, oddly enough, but a lot more feelings flowing around inside me. It's depressing.
post #9 of 20

I am surprised how much I change throughout the day. I can go from super happy to depressed in less than 5 minutes. I started crying at work, because a customer asked if I was pregnant. I was so happy to say yes, that I just started bawling.... I hope this doesn't last! 

post #10 of 20

Up and down here too. Although I do have actual upheaval still going on in my life which make me sad, or lonely and depressed, I have been feeling like the emotionally even keel I had been enjoying since week 14 or so has abandoned me. It takes little or nothing to set me off, I am tired constantly and half the time I feel like an abject failure of a mother! 

Nesting helps, it keeps me feeling focused on the baby, and reminds me how connected DP and I are. <3

post #11 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by InLove2009 View Post

I am surprised how much I change throughout the day. I can go from super happy to depressed in less than 5 minutes. I started crying at work, because a customer asked if I was pregnant. I was so happy to say yes, that I just started bawling.... I hope this doesn't last! 

oh my goodness, I hate the breaking out bawling suddenly thing.  I have done that a couple of times and it is startling to say the least.  And I totally know it's just hormones amplifying things but other people don't understand what is happening.

 

I'm doing pretty good emotionally this time around.  I find that I am way more stressed than usual when my husband's not home (he travels for work) and I break down in tears when our childcare isn't working out (a lot lately. Our nanny left and it's so messy).  Reacting to stress way more than usual, I guess. I find the hormones amplify what I'm already feeling.

post #12 of 20
Thread Starter 
Grrrr. I have to rant.

Right now I am so. mad. My back has been out for weeks, I can hardly walk, I'm sleeping poorly because of it, my dh is gone until tomorrow and my children do nothing but bicker and yell at eachother all day long. And they both have colds. And I have heartburn. I spent three hours decluttering my children's room last night and this morning they completely destroyed it in 45 minutes. I don't mean just played with stuff but can't see the floor destroyed. And I tried to purge their toys and everyone fought it, including dh, but we are drowning, and I mean drowning in toys. And only half of it ever gets played with.
I made them tea this morning in a big pot and they took the teabags out and broke them open and spread the wet contents all over the table and floor. WTH??? They are seven and five! I had turned away for three minutes to do laundry and they turned into toddlers again. It's as if I get something under control in my house and those turkeys see it and think 'yay! Mom made a place for is to play!' Our bathhouse was cleaned top to bottom and organized last week and no kidding there is now mud on the ceiling and walls and rug, all the camping stuff and winter jackets are spread over the floor and clean laundry is scattered everywhere sprinkled with mud and sand. Last night I changed the sheets washed all the bedding and today my seven year old was playing IN HIS BED with mud caked all over the legs of his pants. I give up.
I'm going to make them live outside as soon as their colds go away.

And I've had a stupid yeast infection for six months. Six fricking months.

It all is just pissing me off.

End rant. Thank you for listening.
post #13 of 20
hug.gif hugs, Wrenmoon! That's rough!!! I have some similar sort of complaints but if mine are a 3, yours are a 30! My big thing is that last night I slept from 11:30-1:30 and then 4:30-5:30 - not for lack of trying! The worst part by far though, 2 year old DD has been awake since 5:30 too.... Is it tomorrow yet? eyesroll.gif
post #14 of 20

oh my goodness, wrenmoon, I hope you feel better soon. Re: the yeast infections for 6 months..Ive had them my since I was 14 (im 33 now) at least 6 times a year or more. Not sure what you are doing for it but if you need any advice or anything...well, I have alot of experience with dealing with them. I can really relate..it can really make you crazy, on top of any other craziness that might be going down. 

post #15 of 20

@wrenmoon. I think your kids' behavior would make a saint cry. Like even St. Francis, who dealt with animals and all those lovely things.  Good luck.

 

I've mainly been weepy, but I think I'd be weepy even when not pregnant, because we need to find a place to move into by the middle/end of May and stuff isn't going so great on the home-buying front.

post #16 of 20

Wow. I hear you! 

 

Being on bedrest, I am feeling a roller coaster of emotions - I had a run of miserable days, and yesterday was probably the worst day so far. :( 

Generally weepy, feeling sorry for myself, fluctuating between thinking this bed rest is simply unnecessary and considering what it would be like if I actually did go into labor early. Due to being on, then off, progesterone, I'm having some issues with anxiety, too...that aren't helped by being confined and feeling stuck. 

 

Oh! I have a yeast infection, too! First one my whole life. Blech. 

post #17 of 20
Thread Starter 
What is bed rest like? Do you literally have to stay in bed, all the time? I've just realized that I don't know what that means!
post #18 of 20

Bedrest is awful.

 

I am on strict bed rest, due to a shortened cervix, which means laying flat to keep weight off my cervix - I'm not convinced that even makes sense, since the cervix isn't separate from the uterus and its constantly feeling the pull of the uterus anyway. Many people on bedrest wind up making it to term, get off and are induced! And many on bedrest still continue to dilate and deliver early.  

 

I'm allowed to go to the bathroom, take a shower and go to my doctors appointments. I flip from side to side all day. From not doing anything, I have a hard time sleeping at night. Which makes me miserable and tired during the day. I don't generally like tv (although I do like a few shows on the Food Network) and its uncomfortable to type on my laptop laying down. I've tried to crochet, but that's also difficult in this position. It takes me longer to find movies on netflix than it does to watch them, and I usually lose interest before its even over. I'm so grateful for the help I have, but I'd love my own food. 

 

My sense is that its unnecessary. I could see restricting activity. But this feels like total overkill. I think if I felt like it was actually helpful, I wouldn't be as grumpy about it, but at this point, I feel like a wrongly accused prisoner. 

 

All the doctors in my practice and the peri have said it very well could just be my body, but they can't be sure since my cervix wasn't measured this way in any of my previous pregnancies, and there are no studies at all on womens cervixes through pregnancy to suggest things one way or another. 

 

My history would suggest (at least to me) that this could be within my normal - I tend to have weeks of prodromal labor (so maybe weeks before that I was effacing), and I am very well dilated once I go into active labor (my third baby I was 6-7 when I went in to be induced!). I have never labored more than 3 hours with any of my kids and my last was all of 20 minutes or so. 

 

My hope is once I get past 28 weeks, or even 30, they will lift the strict and go to modified - getting my own food, sitting on the couch, maybe going out for a change of scenery once in a while...

post #19 of 20
Thread Starter 
Oh you poor thing. Do you take five showers a day just for something to do ? I am so sorry that's happening, probably not really what you anticipated when you decided to carry these babies. And the interface with the medical model of care can sometimes be overwhelming in its enthusiasm for safest no matter what the individual says.

My back has made it so hard to stand walk or sit so I spend a fair amount of time flipping from side to side too, I have to be up to do school and feed my kids etc, but I don't know what I would do if I HAD do do that for a long period of time. I keep thinking my back will get better and then life will be normal- the lack of exercise is really a mood dampener. I lay here with my phone cradled in my hands tapping away with my thumbs. Like a teenager. My kids are begging me to stop "lazing around" and go for a walk- which I can't do because it hurts too much. I just cradle my little friend the iPhone.

What do we all have left, around 100 days?
Shoot, it will fly by, right? I'll be thinking of you flipping like a trout on a riverbank all day, and hoping that it does get better.
post #20 of 20
For yeast infections my midwife gave me a miracle cure. I used to get them all the time but they basically went away when I started to drink kombucha (which I am not recommending anyone start drinking while pregnant). She puts pharmaceutical grade boric acid (not BORAX) into capsules and instructs the sufferer to insert into the vagina at night and voila! Yeast infection gone! I have only had one yeast infection this pregnancy and that cleared it up immediately.

I must say, as grateful as I am to be pregnant and to have made it this far the reflux is really getting to me. Waking up with a throatful of stomach acid is terrible and I finally had to resort to tums. Papaya enzyme does nothing for me. Plus this week my ankles started to swell, and I am having upper right quadrant pain and I developed a cold in the last few days. It gets pretty depressing coupled with this constant fear of Preterm labor...
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