Hi mamas! I am a new mom to a wonderful 4-mo-old boy. Currently I am staying home, which I mostly enjoy (except for being on-call about 5 days a month at a local birth center, where I am a doula/birth assistant). However, due to finances, I cannot keep doing this long term, plus I do desire some time away from FT mothering to recharge and have adult interaction. I am an RN and I have been offered a school nurse job at a local high school (actually it's where I went to high school!). The job is FT, however they have offered to let me job-share with another RN so that I could only work 3 days a week and have more time with DS (I have expressed worry about being away from him 40/hrs a week). I'm just having a really hard time deciding what to do...
If I do the PT option, I think I would find it the perfect balance of time with DS and time at work. I think it would be very fulfilling in that way. (I would also continue to take call at the birth center once a week, so if I got called to a birth, I would be gone for part/all of that 4th day too. This would allow me to still be a part of birth work, which I really love). The drawbacks I see to taking the job as PT are that I think it may be annoying to share the work with another nurse (I can foresee myself wanting to do it all "my way" and being irritated that I can't be THE nurse), and of course the financial drawback. My working 3 days a week and attending a birth or two a month at the birth center would be enough money for us to stay in the black and save for retirement/college, but it would not be much cushion (actually the cushion would money from the births, which would just vary month to month, I could get zero births, I could get 5).
If I do the FT option...the only thing holding me back is 40 hrs/wk away from DS (but that's a big deal to me). Granted, he will be 8 1/2 months old when the job starts in August. And thanks to my husband's very flexible work schedule, he would be at home with DH nearly all the time I was at work, except for about 10 hours/wk he'd be with grandma (my mom). AND, since it's a school job, I'm done every day at 3, which means I'm home by 3:30 and would have a few hours with DS before his bedtime (and then of course, there's Xmas and spring breaks and summers off!). AND, the school is being really cool about the possibility of my DH bringing DS to see me every day at lunchtime to nurse him and visit for a short while. And the job itself would be awesome -- I know the school/people and love them, plus, as far as nursing jobs go, school jobs are the CREAM OF THE CROP! I don't think it's likely I could ever find this sweet of a nursing job again (I was chosen over 129 other applicants for this coveted job!) Obviously I would make more money/we could save more, perhaps to the point that when baby #2 or #3 comes along, I could quit working if I wanted to. As I type out all of those perks, I really feel like I am whining. (So if you were reading this and thinking that -- yes, I agree with you! I know so many, many mamas who have to go back to work at 6 weeks and utilize a DCP, whether they desire to or not). I guess it's just that I always thought I would be a SAHM, and most of my friends (who have kids) are SAHMs, and that's just the culture that I'm used to. And I get teary-eyed (ok, flat out cry) over the thought of missing his first steps, first words, etc. And even thought I know that my working FT wouldn't "screw up" my son, I still worry about that because, well...don't new moms worry about everything? ;) I guess the only other downside to me of the FT nurse job other than less time with DS is no longer attending births (I wouldn't want weeks of working 6 days a week. Now, if they'd let me just work at the center in the summer, that would be clutch!).
I hope this is the right forum to post this in...I'm still figuring out my identity as a new mom and I'm not sure yet if I have the "soul" of a SAHM, a WOHM, a WAHM, a PTWOHM, etc. I just know I'm struggling a lot with this decision and would love some advice! Thank you!!! (I have to let the school know by Monday).