kids these days and manners

[corrie43]

Being the nature of this group I assume everyone here tries to teach their kids good manners and to be respectful of people. What I find amazing is the look of amazement on people's faces, and the nice comments we get when my 3 year old actually uses good manners. Like, "It's so refreshing to hear a kid say thank you"

He almost always says please and thank you, when someone holds a door for us he always says "THanks" with a big smile, and the way people smilie back makes you think they've never heard a kid say thanks.
One time he tried to open a door and said "after you please Mom" People turned around and stared, shocked that a child would do that.

I'm proud of him, but also a little sad that this is not the norm, my nephews are horrible, they demand things and don't say thanks. I listen to kids at other tables when we go out to eat and it's just sad. gotta go kids waking up

[Cranberry]

I think children model themselves after their parents. We say please and thank you to ds and he learned to say it, too. Now sometimes he says to me, "Mommy, you forgot to say please."

[menudo]

My kids sometimes have awesome manners...sadly they both love BARNEY and the yget most of it from him!!! (NO LIE!!)

Anyway, it depends on where you lived. When I lived in the South Bronx, I came acrossed the MOST mannerly teens inthe world. The boys were polite and many people apologized when they slipped a curse word in front of my kids.

Now in suburban hell (NJ) these kids of all ages are often so awful. The other day 10 teen boys were in front of my friends house, the ycouldsee us inside. The ykept waving (sarcastically) andsuch. I got annoyed (and immaturaly) gave them the 2 finger salute-yep a double middle finger) . Wrong of me but they apparently took it as an offer and refused to leave. I finally wwent out.with friends dog and spoke to them-they finally left!!!!!!! They have vandalized much property, etc. IT is so pitful and their parents turn a blind eye.

But it all depends in the end on family and geogrqphic location...

[Shantimama]

I am reading an interesting book called "Hold On To Your Kids - Why Parents Matter" that talks about how we now have more of a peer driveculture for our children than a parent centred one and how this is one of the things that gets lost.

[Mom4tot]

Just a funny story to share. The other day my 7 y/o nephew was over and we were all eating lunch. Dd said, "May I please have another glass of juice mom?". My nephew said, "You don't have to ask like that. You can just say, I want more juice." Dd just looked at him a little befuddled.

We use manners simply because it makes things more pleasant. The kids do it naturally, with few gentle reminders. People comment on how polite they are. I think it's great and helps them socially.

I don't think it's old fashioned or expecting too much. They seem to enjoy it and we try to make it fun. I agree that children model it too.

[brookely ash]

Unfotunately, i don't think it is just kidhs that don't have much manners. People in general don't say thank you, or smile, or say excuse me. Its like everyone is living in their own little bubble completly unaware of what is going on around them. Its quite sad.

[ajsmom]

we teach it all day, everyday and...

Ds, 3 1/2 sometimes uses please and thank you on his own. We're still training. He doesn't get out a lot so he doesn't always remember his manners. He is just one of those kids who loves to walk/run everywhere. He is coached a lot before, during and after. And sometimes it works. He talks like a 6 year old but wears diapers.

I hope his behavior catches up with his vocabulary and diction one of these days...

[LunaMom]

Yep, it is terrible that people are so shocked by kids with good manners. I don't think my child is so special because she is polite and thoughtful of others - as far as I'm concerned, that's expected behavior. She learned it from watching her two polite, thoughtful parents!

I'm glad that most of the people I associate with are raising their children to have manners, too, so we rarely come across rude kids. If we do, it's more out in public, with strangers.

A child at the children's museum (maybe he was about 10 or so) actually put his hands on my back to squeeze past me rather than say, "Pardon me."

I know even the greatest kids slip up and forget from time to time, but a kid who never shows any manners? Totally the parents' fault. Really. Unless there is some underlying issue, of course.