OP, I too have not read the entire thread, but I read your story and it resonated with me. I have heard alot of similar comments from parents who use the cio method. I think that, its possible, CIO vs AP vs whathaveyou, is not the point here. Other people's advice, and possibly a desire for more sleep, seem to be at issue.
Adults have a way of making pronouncements, "well, why don't you do xyz? or "we do it this way", with full intent of just expressing thier own opinion and enjoying the opportunity to talk about themselves. They don't necessarily mean to give advice. They don't even necessarily mean that what they do/suggest works. They just want to have something to say. So when you say "I have a lack of abc", most people usually offer solutions, whether abc is sleep or cheap enough laundry soap.
I would add, we had one daughter who, whether in our arms or in bed alone, would need to fuss for about 12 minutes before falling asleep. I mean 12 minutes to the very second, every time, for three months. Many CIO fans said, oh, see, cio works! It happens anyway! Haha. We have another daughter now, and she has never done the whiney/fuss/crying thing before bed. She is awake when she goes down, but its never a crying out thing, its a oh, I'm in bed, zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Every baby is different. Adults, unfortunately, are pretty much the same in the advice department.
PS we have found co-sleeping counter productive after about 2 months of age. DH gets better sleep, and is more productive at work, when he gets to sleep w/o all the extra moving persons in bed. Maybe its time to move on. Or maybe not, I am, after all, one of those adults now :)