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April Chat Thread! - Page 7

post #121 of 362
Quote:
Originally Posted by IronMam View Post

Jessmn...sorry to say it will probably never go back to pre-baby "normal" without surgery. I know that's not what anybody wants to hear. Some moms "snap back" depending on genetics and such...but I imagine evn with excellent skin care and good genes that with a twin pregnancy that's really rare.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by alaskanmomma View Post

Jessmn, even after I had DD and got BELOW my pre pregnancy weight, I had a pooch I didn't have before her. I never got it to go away greensad.gif probably not the thing someone wants to hear, but it's the truth. I know some women get that 6 pack Victoria Secret body after baby, but pretty sure it's the minority.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by cagnew View Post

 

I love you both for telling the truth! I've had the same experience. You know what I hate? All those pins on pinterest that advertise post partum "get your pre-baby body" work-out routines... and then show a picture of a woman who has almost certainly NOT had a baby. It's makes me angry for two reasons- #1, most young mothers do not realize that their bodies are most likely not going to look like that no matter what they do (there are exceptions, of course) and it makes them feel bad about themselves and #2. most of the advertised routines are actually very bad for moms to do.

 

It's hard to get used to what I call my "mom body", but I wouldn't trade it for the world. It comes with becoming a mother, and my children (and husband) are the best thing that has ever happened to me. So if I have to have some "ugly" skin, so be it :) 

 

Jess- I can't help with the skin, but if you have a major pooch after the babies are born, it could be something called a diastasis recti. It's when the ab muscles are split down the middle and don't hold your insides back as tightly as before. Most women experience this during pregnancy and heal in time on their own, but some do not. I highly recommend checking out Julie Tupler's book/dvd "Lose your mummy tummy". She explains the whole thing, tells you what to do to avoid making it worse (NO CRUNCHES or SIT-UPS!), and has simple transverse exercises you can do to bring the muscles back together. You can google her name and find her website. 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Greenlea View Post

Jess I think you should definitely get a belly binder for after baby. They do help with saggy skin. You seem young though...not sure your age. It does seem younger moms bounce back better IMO.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by BaileyB View Post


My friend had twins and you would have never guessed she even had a baby. I didn't know her until about 2 years after she had them so I don't know how long it took for her to get that way.  would guess it mostly would have to do with genetics. Her sister is DH's cousin's wife and we saw them at Christmas 2 weeks after she had their daughter and she was back in her prepregnancy clothes so maybe it's just them. shrug.gif

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by 1babysmom View Post

My cousin didn't even get a single stretchmark on her belly with her twin boys...she did get them on her thighs though (only the tiny white ones). She bounced back pretty fast, although I have never seen her bare belly...but she looks great clothes. wink1.gif. She has always been tiny though. My other cousin who had twins about 2 years ago has more of a pooch but started out more "average" sized. She still looks AWESOME though.

However, it definitely seems more dfficult to deal with the skin aspect rather than the muscle/fat pooch. That has been my experience as well. I completely agree with the belly binder rec...wonderful tool for helping your body return to a comfortable state and helps with diastasis too. There is only so much you can do about the skin (I describe mine as a ground beef belly when I squish it) but you can certainly impact the muscles and even the fat layer!

Buuuuuut, don't be discouraged if it doesn't go back quickly, or at all, or the way you imagined. IMO my mummy tummy helped mature me...I know that sounds weird but it did. (Among other things....I got married at 18, had my first living baby at 20...but obviously few of my peers were in the same place in life as I was). It is so worth every change you go through. Our bodies were designed to do this, and while society makes it more difficult to accept the changes as beautiful (meaning it takes all that much more effort on our part to change our mindset), it helps me to remember that society also doesn't place much value on the family, but for me that is a priority....so it becomes easier to see it all as part of a gorgoeus big picture. smile.gif

 

Thanks, all! I know it won't be the same, but I was hoping for some sense of "this is me" that I recognize. Right now I feel so taken over. I'm going to be 28 at the end of this month so I don't know if that qualifies as young anymore! I was thin before babies so I don't know if that will make a difference, I'm thinking that makes it worse because a smaller amount of skin had to stretch soooo much. I look at my belly and I don't even know HOW it got so big.

 

I will definitely have to look into the belly binder and the proper exercises for post-baby. I didn't even realize the abs could be splitting down the middle...I mean, I definitely wondered where my abs went, but I didn't really think about THAT!


My husband's cousin said she didn't get any stretch marks with hers and I have seen lots of pictures of her in bikinis and she got her figure back, but we'll see. Unfortunately I'm not related to her, darn! :)

 

Everyone has all these great pictures of their bellies while pregnant, and no one ever has pictures post-baby. Not that you want to see bellies when you could be looking at BABIES, but it seems like a forgotten about topic. I hope I am not setting myself up for disappointment. :/

post #122 of 362
Quote:
Originally Posted by jessmn View Post

 

Everyone has all these great pictures of their bellies while pregnant, and no one ever has pictures post-baby. Not that you want to see bellies when you could be looking at BABIES, but it seems like a forgotten about topic. I hope I am not setting myself up for disappointment. :/

 

http://theshapeofamother.com/   <---- post baby belly pictures can be found here :)

post #123 of 362
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by jessmn View Post

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thanks, all! I know it won't be the same, but I was hoping for some sense of "this is me" that I recognize. Right now I feel so taken over. I'm going to be 28 at the end of this month so I don't know if that qualifies as young anymore! I was thin before babies so I don't know if that will make a difference, I'm thinking that makes it worse because a smaller amount of skin had to stretch soooo much. I look at my belly and I don't even know HOW it got so big.

 

I will definitely have to look into the belly binder and the proper exercises for post-baby. I didn't even realize the abs could be splitting down the middle...I mean, I definitely wondered where my abs went, but I didn't really think about THAT!


My husband's cousin said she didn't get any stretch marks with hers and I have seen lots of pictures of her in bikinis and she got her figure back, but we'll see. Unfortunately I'm not related to her, darn! :)

 

Everyone has all these great pictures of their bellies while pregnant, and no one ever has pictures post-baby. Not that you want to see bellies when you could be looking at BABIES, but it seems like a forgotten about topic. I hope I am not setting myself up for disappointment. :/

 

The Feb DDC group here has a post about belly binding where at least one or two of the moms posted progress shots. You might check that out. I would just prepare yourself mentally that it might be poochy so you can be pleasantly surprised if you get your pre-baby figure back!

 

I gained twice as much weight with DD1 than I have with this one (though I'm ending up within 10lbs of where I was with her irked.gif.) With her I got a BUNCH of stretch marks and this time I've gotten no new ones. My old ones are visible but they are still white. After a year or two I knew they were there but they really didn't stand out a lot so I was okay with them. And they are my mommy badge. =) I never worked with the post baby figure with DD1 so this time I'm hoping to bind and see if I can get a reduction in size earlier on. I know my skin won't be perfect and I'm okay with that. 

post #124 of 362

We were going to give my BIL a Steam gift card (Steam is a video game thing), as a thank-you for agreeing to be on DD-duty during the birth. But today I went to buy it and they don't sell just straight up credits. You can only gift actual games. We don't know what all he already has, plus I don't want to try to pick something only to have him end up not liking it. So now I need to come up with a different idea. I'm thinking maybe a Think Geek gift card, but if anybody else has other ideas..

post #125 of 362
Quote:
Originally Posted by jessmn View Post

 

Thanks, all! I know it won't be the same, but I was hoping for some sense of "this is me" that I recognize. Right now I feel so taken over. I'm going to be 28 at the end of this month so I don't know if that qualifies as young anymore! I was thin before babies so I don't know if that will make a difference, I'm thinking that makes it worse because a smaller amount of skin had to stretch soooo much. I look at my belly and I don't even know HOW it got so big.

 

I will definitely have to look into the belly binder and the proper exercises for post-baby. I didn't even realize the abs could be splitting down the middle...I mean, I definitely wondered where my abs went, but I didn't really think about THAT!


My husband's cousin said she didn't get any stretch marks with hers and I have seen lots of pictures of her in bikinis and she got her figure back, but we'll see. Unfortunately I'm not related to her, darn! :)

 

Everyone has all these great pictures of their bellies while pregnant, and no one ever has pictures post-baby. Not that you want to see bellies when you could be looking at BABIES, but it seems like a forgotten about topic. I hope I am not setting myself up for disappointment. :/


"I was hoping for some sense of "this is me" that I recognize" <--- I didn't have twins, but I definitely got that sense back, even if my body wasn't *exactly* the same. It took a while, but over time I did feel like me again! My skin never did pop back to what it was (but my belly is seriously like one giant stretch mark, lol...my skin did not stretch well!), but everything else eventually does return to a much more "normal" state. Mostly I found it just feels SO GOOD to be able to MOVE AROUND again that I don't care so much what I look like, LOL!

 

I will admit, it's taken me a few years to get used to the stretch marks. Mine are really pretty startling, and it's been a long road to get to where I don't feel self-conscious about them!

 

Oh, and I definitely have diastasis recti, and I'm definitely going to be working on that this time around. I only just found out that there IS something you can do about it, so I'm excited about potentially having abs again! haha!

post #126 of 362

I don't mind the stretch marks so much anymore (I started using vit E oil on them as soon as I get pregnant and it really did help fade them! should have used the oil years ago). But I have that mother's apron thing and I HATE it. I'm hoping that belly binding THIS time will help make up for not doing it last time (we couldn't afford to spend even $50 bucks on a binder and I didn't realize I could have just done a make-shift one with fabric).   I'm also going to do the diastasis recti exercises this time, so maybe that will help some as well. *shrug*  Past that, not much I can do until I win the lottery and get a tummy tuck! ROTFLMAO.gif

 

Actually, part of my own sorrows stem from hiding my body so much when I was young and thin because at the time I was part of a religion that taught that wearing a two-piece bathing suit, for example, makes you a bad person. There was a lot of body shame ingrained in me until after DD was born...but then I was ashamed of my body for different reasons. So I definitely have some extra issues that need to be worked through emotionally vs. physically. It gets better with age/maturity though. I was just barely 23 when DD was born. I'm 27 now. A person changes a lot in four years.

post #127 of 362
Quote:
Originally Posted by IronMam View Post

We were going to give my BIL a Steam gift card (Steam is a video game thing), as a thank-you for agreeing to be on DD-duty during the birth. But today I went to buy it and they don't sell just straight up credits. You can only gift actual games. We don't know what all he already has, plus I don't want to try to pick something only to have him end up not liking it. So now I need to come up with a different idea. I'm thinking maybe a Think Geek gift card, but if anybody else has other ideas..

ETA: just found this:
http://www.gamestop.com/collection/steam-cards


IronMam, my DS loves Steam andi am certain he and his dad exchanged Steam gift cards at Christmas. My son is at scouting right ow, but I can ask him for advice about this in about five hours.
post #128 of 362
Quote:
Originally Posted by IronMam View Post

 

http://theshapeofamother.com/   <---- post baby belly pictures can be found here :)

 

Oh that website is good, I just started browsing the twins section. Everyone is so different! I do kind of want to cry, though. I'm sure it's normal.... I have been so focused on the babies this whole time, I've never given a thought to post-baby body. I'm okay with stretch marks, I think they are kind of cool, battle scars you know, but I'm scared of the rest.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TIFF4NY View Post

 

The Feb DDC group here has a post about belly binding where at least one or two of the moms posted progress shots. You might check that out. I would just prepare yourself mentally that it might be poochy so you can be pleasantly surprised if you get your pre-baby figure back!

 

I gained twice as much weight with DD1 than I have with this one (though I'm ending up within 10lbs of where I was with her irked.gif.) With her I got a BUNCH of stretch marks and this time I've gotten no new ones. My old ones are visible but they are still white. After a year or two I knew they were there but they really didn't stand out a lot so I was okay with them. And they are my mommy badge. =) I never worked with the post baby figure with DD1 so this time I'm hoping to bind and see if I can get a reduction in size earlier on. I know my skin won't be perfect and I'm okay with that. 

 

I will check it out, thanks!

 

yeah I like the mommy badge idea! My entire belly is a giant web of stretch marks.

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by omphaloskepsis View Post


"I was hoping for some sense of "this is me" that I recognize" <--- I didn't have twins, but I definitely got that sense back, even if my body wasn't *exactly* the same. It took a while, but over time I did feel like me again! My skin never did pop back to what it was (but my belly is seriously like one giant stretch mark, lol...my skin did not stretch well!), but everything else eventually does return to a much more "normal" state. Mostly I found it just feels SO GOOD to be able to MOVE AROUND again that I don't care so much what I look like, LOL!

 

I will admit, it's taken me a few years to get used to the stretch marks. Mine are really pretty startling, and it's been a long road to get to where I don't feel self-conscious about them!

 

Oh, and I definitely have diastasis recti, and I'm definitely going to be working on that this time around. I only just found out that there IS something you can do about it, so I'm excited about potentially having abs again! haha!

 

That's good news. I figure with time, things will become more normal, although I'm so curious as to what the "new normal" will eventually be....

 

Does anyone know if this diastasis recti something you should see a doctor about? Or just do the binding to help close the gap?

post #129 of 362

Excellent! And we have GameStop in Canada. So hopefully they carry them here! Thanks!

Quote:
Originally Posted by MountainMama15 View Post


ETA: just found this:
http://www.gamestop.com/collection/steam-cards


IronMam, my DS loves Steam andi am certain he and his dad exchanged Steam gift cards at Christmas. My son is at scouting right ow, but I can ask him for advice about this in about five hours.
post #130 of 362

I had my baby shower today. Most of the people didn't show up, but one of my two best friends did, and her daughter (and brought her baby! love.gif ) and one of my not as close but I still consider her a good friend came, too, then my sister and my mom. It wasn't huge, or extravagant, but it was fun. smile.gif I don't know if I mentioned it here, but I know I told DF I was pretty worried about not having enough clothes, but my friend and her daughter gave me *so* many clothes, I don't think that will be an issue anymore, except I still want to get some more gowns. My other friend got me some baby washes, and lotions, and some toys and stuff. It was really fun. The only (not to me, to DD and DS) problem was there wasn't a cake. But I was okay with that, because my mom made these little tartlet things, with cream cheese and blackberries on graham cracker-type crusts, and I might have eaten a few too many, and still have some in the fridge I'm thinking about eating tonight while DF and I watch a movie. shy.gif After the shower, DF and I rewarded the kids by taking them to the park, and then ordering pizza. I'm a bit upset that my other best friend wasn't there, but I understand things come up, I just really would have liked to see her again, before it's even harder to see each other after the baby is born.

post #131 of 362

MmmMMmmmmm...tartlets...drool.gif

 

Those sound awesome.

post #132 of 362
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by TIFF4NY View Post

 

And also a Lisa that requested to join? Please let me know if either of those are you.

 

And a Julie? Did you request the FB group?

post #133 of 362

Hey Tiffany, I don't think I ever saw the link to the fb group. Can you post the group info (or PM it to me?)

post #134 of 362

I have a huge thing with hand sanitizing/washing before holding baby, I've been like this for all the babies. MIL asked DH if I was still going to be "overboard" with Calliope and you'd "think she'd lighten up".. if anything, I'm going to be more diligent with that because if anyone gets sick, I'm the one stuck with 3 kids. Idk why it's so hard to take 30 seconds out of your day to do a quick wash? You probably should wash your hands more often, anyhow.

She also overheard my friend tell me if I still needed her to come over to watch the kids while in labor to give her a call, she went to DH and asked why my friend(who I've been friends with since 3rd grade...) is invited to the birth, but I haven't invited her yet. Oye. All this happened at my sons birthday party, so while I didn't know of what was said until after, I still dislike that drama was brought up at all on his special day(especially since it's really no one's business who I invite/don't invite to -my- birth)

post #135 of 362
Quote:
Originally Posted by bmcneal View Post

I had my baby shower today. Most of the people didn't show up, but one of my two best friends did, and her daughter (and brought her baby! love.gif ) and one of my not as close but I still consider her a good friend came, too, then my sister and my mom. It wasn't huge, or extravagant, but it was fun. smile.gif I don't know if I mentioned it here, but I know I told DF I was pretty worried about not having enough clothes, but my friend and her daughter gave me *so* many clothes, I don't think that will be an issue anymore, except I still want to get some more gowns. My other friend got me some baby washes, and lotions, and some toys and stuff. It was really fun. The only (not to me, to DD and DS) problem was there wasn't a cake. But I was okay with that, because my mom made these little tartlet things, with cream cheese and blackberries on graham cracker-type crusts, and I might have eaten a few too many, and still have some in the fridge I'm thinking about eating tonight while DF and I watch a movie. shy.gif After the shower, DF and I rewarded the kids by taking them to the park, and then ordering pizza. I'm a bit upset that my other best friend wasn't there, but I understand things come up, I just really would have liked to see her again, before it's even harder to see each other after the baby is born.

Glad your baby shower went well! I'm on the kids side, I'd want cake hahaha

post #136 of 362
Quote:
Originally Posted by TIFF4NY View Post

And a Julie? Did you request the FB group?
Yes I'm Julie.

Lots of strong period like cramps this morning and radiating pain in inner thighs after DTD last night with DH. Gonna go walking soon to maybe try to pick them up but being only 37 weeks I'm not expecting full blown labor right now.
post #137 of 362
Alaskanmomma, your story has reminded me to be very grateful my MIL lives on the other side of Canada. I hope I never act that entitled and snotty when my kids start having babies of their own. Geesh.
post #138 of 362

I'm a big hand sanitizing/ washing hands person too when it comes to babies. I have already stocked up on hand sanitizer, knowing that I will require everyone to use a squirt before holding baby. I'm sorry your MIL is the way that she is. 

 

I have a feeling that baby is coming soon. I have been having loose stool for the last three or four days. That's VERY abnormal for me. Like so abnormal that I have been taking two stool softeners a day and eat enough fiber to keep an elephant going for days. Last night I was having some pain in my back, but today I'm VERY crampy and having an out-of-normal back pain that I haven't experienced up until now... I guess we will see. Both my mom and MIL had their children almost three weeks early... and even though I know that doesn't mean a whole lot, I guess it's possible! 

post #139 of 362
Quote:
Originally Posted by bambihelton View Post

I'm a big hand sanitizing/ washing hands person too when it comes to babies. I have already stocked up on hand sanitizer, knowing that I will require everyone to use a squirt before holding baby. I'm sorry your MIL is the way that she is. 

 

I have a feeling that baby is coming soon. I have been having loose stool for the last three or four days. That's VERY abnormal for me. Like so abnormal that I have been taking two stool softeners a day and eat enough fiber to keep an elephant going for days. Last night I was having some pain in my back, but today I'm VERY crampy and having an out-of-normal back pain that I haven't experienced up until now... I guess we will see. Both my mom and MIL had their children almost three weeks early... and even though I know that doesn't mean a whole lot, I guess it's possible! 


oh good idea, I hadn't thought of getting a bottle of hand sanitizer.

 

Is the way your mother gave birth an indicator of how you will?

 

 

 

As for me, I have gotten a little less depressed about the prospect of what my body will be like post-babies. I think for now, I can be more at peace knowing I can't predict what will happen since everyone's bodies vary so much. But I am thankful for all the links everyone gave me and the stories I heard in the multiples forum because it's given me options and a good reality check. Now I know to ask the hospital for a belly binder for c-sections if they don't offer it to me. My husband is super supportive of me, too, which made me cry. So far I haven't been TOO overly emotional about anything, but this was definitely a tipping point for me. I haven't felt ready for the babies, but now I just want the babies to be here so we can move on to something new.

post #140 of 362
Anyone ever heard of the dark red/purple line a woman in labor gets in her butt crack? The higher up the line in your butt crack the more dilated you are. I read an article on it and well, I have that line right now. Its not high at all but the CTX I've been having are still coming, although sporatic. Maybe this baby will be here sooner rather than later smile.gif
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