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April 2013 Chit Chat - Page 33

post #641 of 734
Quote:
Originally Posted by TalkToMeNow View Post

 

I cannot be neutral here. J is my friend. J has always been super sweet and supportive of me. I <3 her. I can't just sit by and watch everyone bash her unfairly. She has been a member of this group since the beginning and has been helpful and kind to a lot of us. I agree with her on almost everything. She is an awesome mama and person. 

 

I don't have another forum or group to go to. I don't post anywhere else, and I want to cry about the idea of not having this group. I have spent a lot of time and energy here. I am a long time member and prolific poster, and I have always been respectful towards everyone. I think that should say something. But I have to stand up for my friend, as crappy of a job as I may be doing. If I am no longer welcome here because of that, so be it.

I totally agree with the above.  I don't post anywhere else on the internet.  And even when I felt a little nervous about joining in on the conversation on this DDC, it was J who encouraged me to be more open.  So, J, thank you for that!  Don't think about dropping out.  You, too, Amanda!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I check this board everyday.  It's the only board on the entire internet I check.  It is part of my routine, and I'd really, really hate for a difference in opinions or whatever else has occurred disrupt what is special for a lot of us.  I learn from all of you and have so enjoyed the discussion about our kids, our lives, our triumphs, and our problems.  We can disagree with each other.  It's okay.

 

Maybe we can agree to some ground rules?  If you have a concern that might be embarrassing or controversial, let's just PM.  Let's agree to disagree at times.  Let's not let group think creep in (i.e., debate still welcome).  Abra?  Stay, okay?


Edited by ZippyGirl - 4/29/13 at 8:08am
post #642 of 734
Quote:
Originally Posted by TalkToMeNow View Post

Quote:
Originally Posted by CDsMom1031 View Post

[URL=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F16kZd9ql9o

Very cute. Love it. Love his curly hair. Feel proud- little dude has three more words than Jasper now. Lol. 
[/quote

I didn't even know he could say that until tonight. He dropped a toy and started saying it over and over again. I was cracking up!

I also don't post anywhere else. I like you girls. I'm content. Kind of like me being faithful in my marriage. You've given me no reason to stray. wink1.gif
post #643 of 734
Quote:
Originally Posted by ZippyGirl View Post

Maybe we can agree to some ground rules?  If you have a concern that might be embarrassing or controversial, let's just PM.  Let's agree to disagree at times.  Let's not let group think creep in (i.e., debate still welcome).  And let's not accept someone wanting to drop out.  Abra?  Stay, okay?

 

I could agree to pretty much all of these (I was already having the discussion about PMs with another, wiser poster - should've listened to her!) 

 

But I don't know how I feel about "not accepting someone dropping out" - it seems like, if someone needs to take some space for whatever reason, "not accepting" that could feel a little cultlike to me. :/ 

 

I've also been on a lot of forums with "habitual flouncers" - you know the type: they threaten to leave anytime someone disagrees with them, and then the whole forum is supposed to rush around and beg them to stay. (Not referring to anyone in this DDC, as far as I know.) 

 

So, at this point, my automatic response to "I'm leaving" is more like, "Sorry to hear it, we'll still be here when you come back."  Which is probably true. 

post #644 of 734
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaimee View Post

I ran my first 5K fun run on Friday night since having kids.  Seriously, the last fun run I did was 7.5 years ago when I still lived in Tucson.  It was really fun to get out there and be part of that running crowd again.  I wasn't particularly well trained as I kept having to take time off of running every couple of weeks due to illness and freezing weather and I spent the entire day of the race working in the yard with my dad hauling landscaping rocks and mulch around.  But I pushed myself and ended up with a time I'm quite proud of- faster than some of my high school times!  Of course, I paid for it the next day with some stomach soreness/pain.  I swear my diastasis recti makes it feel like my stomach is falling out of my body when I vigorously exercise.

So cool, Jaimee! Way to go!!!

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by jbk21 View Post
Jaimee, people have given you a very skewed view of what that site is.  Kali, that is not why you left that board.
 

Erm, yes it was. The whole reason I went to that board in the first place was an online friend told me people were talking about me and my son in a negative light. I saw, not only on my thread but many others on TWWS, that the members OFTEN wanted to pick on MDC members stories, especially anyone with UC, gifted kids, etc. I think internet gossip is really awful and slander is worse, so I tied to set the record straight. I only visited the board fot maybe a week, and during that time made a few other comments that I was jumped all over for. Yes, one of them was that I occasionally spanked my kids. It was not my first method of discipline but I found it to be necessary on occasion. But I did not thin it warranted my being called a child abuser. Anyway, after I saw all the snarkiness going on other there I realized it was a huge waste of time. :)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaimee View Post

Kali, I realized my previous comment may have been a bit ambiguous... I meant to say, that it's crazy to me that anyone would pick on your comment about your child winning a chess tournament.  How strange. 

It was really strange. They seemed to pick on those of us in the MDC Gifted Kids forum, weird.

post #645 of 734
Quote:
Originally Posted by glassesgirlnj View Post

So, at this point, my automatic response to "I'm leaving" is more like, "Sorry to hear it, we'll still be here when you come back."  Which is probably true. 


Okay, I didn't phrase this perfectly. Obviously we can't stop people from leaving. You said it better. I would just be sad to lose members. I'm off to bed! Looking forward to tomorrow!
post #646 of 734
Ca
Quote:
Originally Posted by seraf View Post

Sorry, I don't feel like I have space in my life for drama. I'm not choosing sides. I like everyone here to some degree. I try to share news but avoid gossip. Words have a lot of power behind them.

Nicole, his oh no is so cute.

Soren seems like such a baby to me still. We are just having dinner with family and probably cake.

Cannot believe Soren is 1! Happy birthday!
post #647 of 734
Whoa wai.t So what board is this on?
Quote:
Originally Posted by glassesgirlnj View Post

Sorry to freak a few of you guys out!  There's another board (where I mostly lurk but occasionally post), and they do talk about some MDC posters, including Becky, on the regular.  

I'm not fond of the tone of some of those threads, especially when they're "snarking" a person living with a mental illness.  (Anyone remember the folks who used to go to Bedlam Hospital to poke the inmates with sticks? ISTR they brought picnic baskets and everything...) 

On the same board, I've also heard discussions of sleuthing out an MDC poster's location and calling CPS on her, based on her posts here.  I don't know if this has ever actually happened, or what became of it, but it's a good reminder that anything we post to this DDC is completely public. 

...I am probably just cranky today because Annamaria has decided she wants to drop naps COMPLETELY, and she's not even 17 months old yet.  Anyone else in this situation?
post #648 of 734
Thread Starter 
Oh Becky, don't indulge anybody by even giving it a thought. Please.
post #649 of 734

And I seriously don't know what to say about all of this, other than that I'm sorry that what I had so say brought all of it to the surface. *I* feel responsible. I just felt like I was receiving unsolicited advice about something RELATED to what I was asking about. And I'm sorry I was a jerk about it. I went out on a limb, against my better judgement, asking about my fertility(something I normally wouldn't talk about) and what might be going on. No, I might not have gone about charting or following my cycles accurately. But I came for support. 

 

No, a vasectomy is not covered by his insurance and his insurance was recently switched as well, so maybe one will be covered. But all that isn't covered will have to be paid up front. Yes, I could put CRAP in my body. I hated it. It made me gain weight and I ate like a cow.

 

And yes, my real name is on here. I don't care. I had another account on here, with which it got hacked by my ex and I also had it closed because I took a step back from the internet and then I got this one. It's connected to my Facebook, so it has my name on it.

 

As far as anyone else and the rest of the sad bullshit I've seen on here, I'm really sorry and it's really disappointing. greensad.gif

post #650 of 734
Quote:
Originally Posted by dashley111 View Post

Oh Becky, don't indulge anybody by even giving it a thought. Please.

yeahthat.gif

 

Just ignore it.

post #651 of 734
Quote:
Originally Posted by TalkToMeNow View Post

yeahthat.gif

 

Just ignore it.

Seriously, I don't want to feed into it, I just want to see. I think I'd deserve to know. Know what I mean?

post #652 of 734
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Becky Wheeler View Post

Seriously, I don't want to feed into it, I just want to see. I think I'd deserve to know. Know what I mean?

 

 

It is hard sometimes, though, not to take things personal.  Even if you know certain things are non-truths, or if you feel justified in how/what/whatever your doing, when people say things...it could hurt.  That is all.  We all care about you, ALL of us, I honestly believe there is not a single person on this board that doesnt care about you and your childrens wellbeing-  and we do NOT want your feelings to be hurt if people are saying hurtful things about you.  If you just leave it alone, there will be nothing to talk about...

post #653 of 734
Quote:
Originally Posted by dashley111 View Post

 

 

It is hard sometimes, though, not to take things personal.  Even if you know certain things are non-truths, or if you feel justified in how/what/whatever your doing, when people say things...it could hurt.  That is all.  We all care about you, ALL of us, I honestly believe there is not a single person on this board that doesnt care about you and your childrens wellbeing-  and we do NOT want your feelings to be hurt if people are saying hurtful things about you.  If you just leave it alone, there will be nothing to talk about...

Obviously, the highlighted part is not true because I never knew about them talking about me until today and they've been talking about me for over a year. I've been the butt of their sick, sad jokes and tangents for that long.

post #654 of 734
One thought on this situation, do you encourage/tolerate gossip from your children? Do you encourage their friends to gossip about them? Where do you draw the line between gossip and bullying?
post #655 of 734
Quote:
Originally Posted by seraf View Post

One thought on this situation, do you encourage/tolerate gossip from your children? Do you encourage their friends to gossip about them? Where do you draw the line between gossip and bullying?

No kids, but friends/coworkers/family, no. Zero tolerance. The minute they start, I tell them to STFU because I don't give a hoot.

I'm sure I'll have a similar policy with my kids.
post #656 of 734
Quote:
Originally Posted by Becky Wheeler View Post

Obviously, the highlighted part is not true because I never knew about them talking about me until today and they've been talking about me for over a year. I've been the butt of their sick, sad jokes and tangents for that long.

 

Becky there has been a lot of support and offers for help.  If you choose to ignore that, that's on you.

 

Would you accept help from our DDC?  Because we want to help, too.  Based on information from YOUR post elsewhere, your son's carseat is two years expired and it is also improperly used.  There are resources in your area that can assist you with getting a proper seat and showing you the right way to use it.  Call the FD and/or Child Care Connections.

Casey is 3.  She should not be in a booster seat.  Even if she were in a booster seat, she would need a shoulder strap.  However, that is still the wrong thing to do- she needs a 5 point harness.

 

Using a vehicle that doesn't accommodate your seats is not an option, no matter where you are going or what you need to do.   Van is broken down and you have a Clutch concert to go to with your two young children?  Truck doesn't fit the carseats?  You do not go.  Sorry, but going anyway without your children properly restrained is irresponsible.  There are other photos have you have posted HERE on MDC of Levi improperly restrained in his seat.  Please, for the safety of your children, listen to this advice.  Get them proper seats (there are free options in your area) and use them correctly every single time.

post #657 of 734
Quote:
Originally Posted by jbk21 View Post

 

Would you accept help from our DDC?  Because we want to help, too. 

yeahthat.gif  How can we help, Becky?  grouphug.gif

post #658 of 734
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ZippyGirl View Post

yeahthat.gif  How can we help, Becky?  grouphug.gif

 

 

I sent Becky a message on Facebook asking the same thing. 

post #659 of 734
A year of public shaming for improper carseat use?
post #660 of 734

One thought on this situation, do you encourage/tolerate gossip from your children? Do you encourage their friends to gossip about them? Where do you draw the line between gossip and bullying?

 

My daughter will need to acquire some more words before she starts gossiping. ;)

But I do plan to teach her not to put anything in writing (email, social media, text, whatever) that you wouldn't want printed out, with your real name on it, and posted next to the coffee machine at your job. Doesn't matter how "confidential", "friendslocked", etc etc, it is. (You'd be amazed how many grown adults in the corporate world haven't figured that one out yet...)

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