I'm totally new to parenting - my 2.5 year old has me over a barrel, so am not good on useful advice - but we did knock the spitting one on the head by just telling her there was no spitting INSIDE, except whilst doing teeth in the bath.
Now, if she starts spitting....I give her a warning...then take her gently by the hand, and we go outside. Whereupon I just say: Go for it. You can spit out here. But not inside. Then I go back inside. Basically, with no audience (?) and being forced to do it somewhere not fun...it became, well, not fun anymore.
She went through a real spitting phase - but the above seems to have cured her. (Though occasionally I see her spitting over the side of her cot during nap time - on the monitor - but not much I can do about that one...she gets a free pass...since in theory, she's alone and having private time.)
We haven't done the toilet thing - but can you feasibly put a toilet lock on it, until he gets over the novelty?
Mantras: I have none, will be keen to read other people's. On a really bad day, the only thing that gets me through are two thoughts: It won't be like this forever. And, soon there will be sleep in toddlerville, and I can finally....finally...have some peace and go to bed myself!
Edit to add: Oh, and I hear you on the no nap day thing. Mine has just started to drop a nap, maybe once a week or 9 days? And, well, I am NOT ready for this - it is totally freaking me out! (I exaggerate, but only a little...!)
Edit AGAIN: Do you mean spitting out food? I was just talking to run-of-the-mill spitting. Though last night, we had our first real spit-out of food. Hmm.
Edited by Grover - 4/11/13 at 7:04pm