Our beautiful DD was born a week ago and so far tandem nursing with my 2 yo DS has been a better experience than I thought it would be, except that I'm not sure I can keep up with both of them. It seems like whenever DS nurses he takes a lot of milk and I feel soft and empty for hours afterward. Lately when I nurse DD within an hour or two of nursing DS, it takes a long time for my milk to let down and sometimes it actually doesn't. She also has a bit of trouble latching sometimes because I'm so soft. Sometimes she doesn't seem to swallow much and after she finishes both sides she still roots and seems hungry. So far her weight gain and stool output has been good, but it just doesn't seem like she is getting very much at a feeding and I'm worried that will change. She's been very sleepy today (I'm going to have to wake her for her next feed, which was more than three hours ago) and I'm wondering if it's because she's not getting enough?
The problem is, I'm not sure how to cut back. It's one of the only ways we can get him to sleep, so that means nursing at naptime and bedtime. And when he wakes during the night (which usually only happens once, thank goodness) or wakes up groggy in the morning or after his nap and I don't nurse him for as long as he needs it, he loses it, as in screaming non-stop at the very top of his lungs and hitting everything in sight (today he hit the baby before we could stop him ) which is hard enough to deal with on its own but we have neighbors upstairs who have made it very clear that they hate noisy children. So I have no idea how to go about setting limits with him.
Does it sound like I need to cut back on how often and how long I nurse DS, and if so, has anyone had success setting limits with or weaning a high-spirited toddler?