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Where will your small children go while you're in labor?

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 

What do you plan to do with your little kiddos when you're giving birth?  Even for homebirth mamas?

What have you done in the past, especially if you don't have any family living in the area?


My mom will hopefully be here when I go into labor but she lives 12 hours away so if I deliver early there is a decent chance that it will take her at least a day to get up here.  I plan to ask a couple different neighbors and a good friends of ours if they will be our DS contingency plan but I'll be giving birth at a hospital 40 min away and I'm starting to worry what I'll do if I go into labor in the middle of the night before my mom arrives to help.  I'm crossing my fingers that labor becomes obvious during the day again this time so we'll be able to get our back-up babysitters here or DS to their houses at a reasonable hour.


I know it's still early but this has been on my mind since we decided not to have a homebirth

post #2 of 13
We plan a homebirth, and we also have family in the area, so we are lucky. Unless I birth at night while kidlets are sleeping, they will probably go with my parents.
post #3 of 13
We'll probably ask my BIL & SIL to be "on call" for us, as they live nearby. Our kids go to full-time daycare during the week as well, so if labor starts on a weekday during business hours we'll be covered for a little while. smile.gif
post #4 of 13

We're lucky to have both sets of grandparents in town. Since it'll probably mean a 2-night hospital stay for me, my kids will go together to DH's parents for the first night (because my mom will to the hospital with me and attend me in birth) and then to my parents' for the second night. It should all be grand, but my anxiety is that DS has never spent a night away from me.  He still wakes in the middle of the night and needs to come in to my bed and snuggle. I'm thinking we'll do a trial night at each grandparents' later in the summer, with both kids since DS is probably going to deal with it much better with his sister there with him, and then at least the baby's birth won't be the first time he's been away overnight. My DD was much more independent at this age and was already having sleepovers just for fun, but DS is just more of a mama's boy. I guess it'll work out fine--their doting grandparents will do what it takes.

post #5 of 13
With my last home birth my son just stayed with us, i am a happy labourer hehe. And until pushing able to focus elsewhere. This time round we will have one if not both boys present depending on how quickly things go, I will send dh to collect ds1 from school I think it's important they are present for the births of their siblings I personally think it helps with the transition of a new babe entering the world and relieves any confusion on very young children's parts.
We do of course have a back up. My mil lives a block away and can be here within minutes if need be. At my last two births I have only had my husband and midwives this time I am considering someone to help with the boys and a friend to take photo's.
post #6 of 13
Thread Starter 

I'm so jealous of all you ladies with family nearby. I feel like that would just make this so much less worrisome.  A couple years ago we bought a house ~2hrs from a very tight knit community that felt like family where we'd lived for years (we couldn't afford to buy anything there). Though we have made some friends here it's not quite the same. Were we still there I'd have any number of perfect options for him.  DH's family is the closest at 6 hrs away with my parents at 12hr.  With young kids I wonder all the time why we decided to be so far away from our support networks.


Though I like the idea of DS being present for his siblings birth, I am unfortunately not a very happy laborer. At least, not last time. I had 20+ hours of back labor.  If it is anything like that this time I feel that I would scare DS more than anything.

post #7 of 13
I've always had my kids there along with my husband and two midwives. It has worked fine for us. Usually the kids do their own thing. One birth they slept through (the midwives didn't make that one either). During my second my 3yr old daughter rubbed my feet. They usually are there for the birth. For my last there were four kids in the tub, the midwives, my husband and I all in our small bathroom. It was fine, and when the baby came out bluish and not breathing we all put our hands on him and called to him and he took a breath. Our family is close and I'm used to not having help.
post #8 of 13

I haven't decided yet but I think I want her there with us.  But I have a friend who can come get her as backup if needed as well.

post #9 of 13

We had a homebirth with our 3rd and have no family nearby. Our girls were 5 & 2 and did totally fine playing/coming and going to and from the room during labor as they pleased. They attended the birth and that was left up to them. This time we're using a birth center that is very family friendly and welcomes siblings to attend, so it will be up to them again if they wish to attend. They were very excited when we toured the center and are looking forward to attending. We're also a close family and tend to do things together and they are very comfortable with the birthing process.

post #10 of 13
All f my kids have been born at home and I've been lucky enough that all the other children have always slept through the birth of their siblings. I sure hope that's the case once again!
post #11 of 13
All of my kids are older (no toddlers I mean) and they all want to be present for the birth. I'm looking forward to them meeting the new baby!
post #12 of 13

Ciga, I'm right there with you. We live in Austria and all our family is in the US. We're hoping my MIL or aunt can come over around the due date, but it's not easy scheduling international flights around a birth. I've got a close friend and a couple neighbors that might be able to help, but it's not the same as family.

post #13 of 13

As the pregnancy progresses, I consider more and more keeping the kids home unless one of them specifically decides he or she wants to go to my parents'. We've decided to hire a student doula, and between her and my partner, we should have enough hands to have someone assist with the kids and someone to support me emotionally through my birthing time. My eldest (6) wants to work on the baby's "birth day" party: baking a cake and decorating the living room (I plan to birth in our bedroom) while she waits and maybe coming at the end to see the baby birthed, so likely we will plan for that.

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