I've read through some of the other threads, but I'm just so tired I can't process well right now, so forgive if this post is repetitive...
Our 8 month old DD has never once slept through the night. She's never slept longer than a 4 hour stretch, but typically she's up about every hour or 2. We started to try sleep training when she was about 6 months and we were on vacation so DH could get up with her, but as soon as we got back home everything went back to normal, and worse. Here's what we're facing:
-we basically live in a 1 BR house, so there's no separate room to put her in, or for one of us to sleep in - She's sidecarred next to our bed. DS (almost 3) sleeps in a crib in the living room. The only room with doors is our bedroom, so we're constantly worried about her crying waking DS up, so I defaulted to nursing her practically immediately whenever she woke. This is now what she expects - if I try to comfort her in any other way, her little cries become tortured, purple-faced screams. Same if DH tries to comfort her. This can go on for over an hour if we let it, but usually after about 10-15 mins, I give in and nurse her. Or I nurse her immediately because I'm too tired to try and break the habit. The result? Sometimes she's up every 45 mins, and often she's clearly comfort nursing - she'll just keep nursing every 45 mins, and then spit up massively. I have an oversupply as well, so on bad nights where she's up that often, she boosts my production, so then the next night, if perchance she goes 2 hours without waking, I'm hugely full and she gets too much foremilk and has an upset tummy, and then she's up every 45 mins again after that first or second waking...
-To make everything even more difficult, she's started pulling herself to standing, and she's always been hugely active - so when she wakes up at night, she immediately flips onto her belly and starts crawling around. If I don't wake up right away when she does this, she'll go to the edge of the crib and start pulling herself up - since she's sidecarred, the mattress is high, which means she could easily pitch herself over the edge. So I sleep on eggshells if she's in her crib, and can't just let her sort of crawl around and wear herself out...so usually she ends up in bed with me after the first waking at midnight, which means she's screaming because she'd rather play, and if she's sleeping she's tucked in right next to the boob, which means she wants to nurse every 45 minutes. Lather, rinse, repeat.
-DH usually has to be up for work at 3:30 am, so he can't take the night wakings (and sleeps through them anyway unless she gets to the purple-faced stage). I don't get home from work until 10 pm. The only time he and I get together is our dinner at 10 pm, so we're loathe to send him to bed before I get home since that means we won't see each other at all. DH often naps when he gets home, but I can't nap during the days - I have multiple jobs, and even if I had the time, naps give me migraines...so I'm running on 3-5 hours of sleep a night, and DH on 5-6. We're just absolutely spent.
We cloth diaper and EC, so we've tried no diaper, doubles, triples, and tried disposables a few times this week since she hates being wet and maybe that's contributing. We've tried swaddling, warm pajamas, no pajamas...If we give her the pacifier or a lovey, she just plays with it and that seems to wake her up further. She has no teeth yet, but doesn't seem about to pop one, and this has been going on since birth, so it's not a regression, just what it is. We have a white noise machine that seems to make no difference at all, and we don't want to CIO, but couldn't anyway because of DS. She can go a 6 hour stretch during the day with no food without problems (not something we try to do, but it's happened once or twice with communication failures/long naps) and naps great during the day - a minute or two of crying or fussing and then right to sleep - and she even falls asleep okay at 8 pm, but then it's screaming, wanting to nurse, wanting to play...all. night. long. She's such a lovely, easy baby during the days, and at night I'm at the point where I could potentially leave her outside for the wolves.
Any thoughts? Miracle solutions? Hungry wolves you know of?