- topicTrying To Conceivetagged by librarygirl, 5/1/13
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Bajingo Juice brings forth May Flowers and BFPs! TTC #1 in our 30s - Page 3post #41 of 665/12/13 at 10:31amThread Starterpost #42 of 665/12/13 at 12:50pmpost #43 of 665/13/13 at 4:53pm
Alright, Faithrainbow! Go you!
Librarygirl, I was thinking about the other thing you wrote, about seeing folks who don't care about their kids. I actually work in the medical records department of a pediatric hospital (don't be surprised if I delete this later because I am terrified of someone finding all the personal stuff I've written on here). The abuse cases! Just terrible. You wouldn't even want to think of the things that can happen. I am dealing with this issue right now where I keep dealing with records for babies who are the same age that my lost baby would have been. Every time I see one of these kids hurt and in the hospital it takes the wind out of my sails. Terrible.
I was a mess on mother's day... I was pregnant last mother's day. AF started today. I am now officially infertile.
post #44 of 665/14/13 at 5:09amThread Starterteamviddy, I am so so so sorry. *Hugs* It's not supposed to be this hard, is it? I can't imagine the things you must see. I just wish all of those people knew how lucky they are to have that child when there are so many people who want them and would be great parents. I only see the bad parenting in public as a librarian so it's rarely even things that CPS would raise an eyebrow at. Just makes me sad.
Mother's Day- I actually took myself shopping (early, before the crowds) and bought a new top and new dress and took myself out for a take-out breakfast that I ate at a park. Then hung out with my puppy and watched tv and made my husband a yummy dinner. I avoided Facebook and all those "my kids are my life" posts. Unfortunately, DH's grandmother passed away on Friday so we had to do the funeral stuff yesterday. DH'S lost his step-mom in February and now grandma so things have been a little rough for him. After the services yesterday, we went to dinner at a buffet and were seated by a large group consisting of an older couple, their 2 daughters, a son-in-law, and 8 children under 11. We decided the split was 2 and 6 kids between the young women. They kept apologizing for noise, kids moving, a toddler talking to us, etc. but we were delighted. They were very nice and the kids were well-behaved. We enjoyed sitting by them. I generally agree that little ones shouldn't disrupt diners at fancy restaurants, but a casual buffet environment was just fine.
So I hope others had an okay Mother's Day. Maybe by this time next year, we'll all be celebrating with our own little ones.post #45 of 665/14/13 at 5:48ampost #46 of 665/14/13 at 5:57amThread Starterpost #47 of 665/14/13 at 4:22pm
Viddy- Big hugs Thinking of you....
Librarygirl- I'm glad you had a wonderful Mother's Day and treated yourself gently.
I think you can officially graduate me. I had a ultrasound today and it showed a nice big healthy yolk sac. I have another one next week to see the heart beat! My estimated due date is January 14th.
Thank you all for the support over the pasf 2 years. Everyone has been awesome and I so deeply appreciate you sharing the journey with me. I will stay subscribed so I can rejoice in your upcoming bfps!!!
Edited by JustJenny - 5/15/13 at 9:58ampost #48 of 665/14/13 at 8:29pmThread StarterSo, interesting things with me. On 11dpo, AF arrived. Light and short and early but with a couple of hours of excruciating cramps. Light, but red bleeding for 3-4 days. Mild cramps. But now, it's been 10 days since AF started and I still have cramps and sore breasts, plus nausea (which is not uncommon with cluster headache sufferers but head isn't bad right now) and wicked heartburn. The cramps aren't really painful, just a bit uncomfortable, but should have gone away a week ago. I got a BFN on a $tree cheapie 5 days ago.
What do you think? Could I be pregnant? I picked up a box of FRER tonight. Should I POAS again? If that wasn't my period and was implantation or I am one of those women who has "periods" through pregnancy, I would be 22dpo tomorrow. That should be a BFP even if I implanted on 11dpo, right? I know I am probably not.... But I can dream, right?
I will email my CNM in a couple of days if I get another negative but symptoms stick around.
Sorry guys, I just needed to share this. DH knows about the sore breasts and nausea but I haven't told him my suspicion because I don't want to get his hopes up (mine are enough).post #49 of 665/15/13 at 8:46pm
Greetings from Pittsburgh (on a work trip)
Librarygirl--Let's see, if you took a test five days ago that was about 16 DPO? I think those usually come up positive by then, but I have heard of exceptions. I really hope you are! And I am glad to hear you treated yourself on Sunday. I'm sorry to hear about the losses you and your DH have been enduring. What kind of a puppy do you have? I love dogs.
JustJenny--I'm so happy for you! It sounds like everything is going great so far! Just think, this time next year you'll be celebrating Mother's Day with a baby in your arms.
Viddy--Aww, hang in there!! It may have been a year, but I don't think you should count any cycles where you didn't get to BD around the right time. I think they only consider you infertile if you have been have well-timed intercourse for a year. I both of our husbands haven't always had the best . . . timing. With that said, I am in the same boat as next month is the one-year anniversary of my miscarriage and I did not expect to still be trying a year later. I do have the Christiane Northrup book you recommended, and I really like it (though it does make me feel like I am just too overextended to get pregnant). Then again, I know lots of pregnant women with more demands and commitments than I have. And the story about your massage therapist is so, so sad. I will pray for her tonight.
Verdahekawi--Hello and welcome! And yes, as hard as it is to go through a loss, it is comforting to know that you can get pregnant; many women cannot. I also did the not trying/not avoiding thing for a year, then got pregnant, miscarried, and through the process realized I really truly did want a family (previously I think I had some ambivalency). That's great that you have been getting healthier--that will make your eventual pregnancy all the better.
Faithrainbow--My goodness, what a blessing! Hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy.
I don't have much news on my end. This is turning out to be a really long cycle. I'm on CD 39 and only 7 DPO. We did end up BDing around the time of O, so I am somewhat hopeful, but I don't feel any different than usual. My breasts are a little tender as they usually get a week or so before my period starts. I got a referral a little while back to see a reproductive endocrinologist a few women have recommended, and when I get back home I think I will be making an appointment. I've been so wanting all the natural efforts to work, but I'm feeling like it's a little hopeless. I've been following the "Making Babies" plan for my type (stuck) since January, trying to reduce stress, done acupuncture, sobadas, tinctures, had a full hormone panel and vaginal ultrasound. I take prenatals, vitex, acidophilus, evening primrose oil, baby aspirin, calcium, omega-3s, B-complex, zinc, maca, sprirulina, flax seed oil (not all at once, but regularly). I've cut all meat other than fish out of my diet (for going on six months now), cut way back on dairy, and eat so many greens. I do yoga every morning and ride my bike everywhere. I've mostly given up coffee and booze. I'm trying to practice mindfulness, doing meditations almost daily and taking an online course on mindfulness. I'm taking a tai chi class, too. I pray for a family. I've tried castor oil packs and do self-womb massage. I don't feel as weepy and tragic right now as I have in the past, but I am aware that none of these efforts seem to be working. Oh, and librarygirl please update my age as I am now 33. BOO!!post #50 of 665/16/13 at 3:55ampost #51 of 665/17/13 at 11:00ampost #52 of 665/17/13 at 12:51pmpost #53 of 665/20/13 at 1:48pmThread Starter
I'm back! Sorry, just been busy and away from regular computer. I have a hard time typing a full message on my phone.
No BFP for me. I think the symptoms must have been from the vitex I started about a month ago just causing my hormones to be all crazy. On a happier note, I O'd yesterday on CD15!!! So the vitex must be working- I've been an almost always CD18 since I started charting over two years ago. So this will be the first cycle with Vitex (started around O last cycle) and using PreSeed (I have to take antihistamines to survive the spring months and often take benedryl throughout the year for allergies, so I have been a bit dry lately). We've read such good things about PreSeed so thought we'd give it a try before going any more drastic (this is our 9th cycle). Whether it works for getting pregnant or not, we may make it a staple in our love-life. Very very nice. We DTD with PreSeed three times in the four days leading up to O so we'll see. So so so much going on so hopefully I can be busy with other things and not worry about TWW. Getting ready for Summer Reading Program at my library, just back from celebrating our 1st wedding anniversary (I O'd on our anniversary! maybe we'll get an anniversary baby!), sister's bachelorette party and wedding are rapidly approaching, another sister is (assuming she says yes) getting engaged this week (boyfriend of 6 years told my mom that he's going to ask her while they are at the beach this week) so we'll have another wedding to plan, etc, etc, etc.
Hope everyone else is good!
For conversation's sake, what supplements/strategies/old wive's tales are you using/trying for TTC?
Me: Alive Women's Max Potency daily vitamin (CNM said they were better than any prenatal she's seen on the market when I asked about using them instead of prenatals), Vitex (1200mg daily), a homemade fertility tea (red clover, nettle, red raspberry leaf, dandelion seed, peppermint) most days. I chart but only CM, not temps. It's Billings Ovulation Method and I took a class last year- haven't temped since. Attempting to get more exercise (I'm a couch potato by nature) and to go grain and dairy free (paleo diet) in an attempt to lose some weight, help with blood sugar, and boost energy levels.
actual DTD stuff- probably TMI- orgasm AFTER DH, laying with hips propped up for a few minutes (I know the experts say you only need about 30 seconds for the sperm to get into the cervix and if they don't get there then, they aren't going to, but I figure it doesn't hurt!)
What are you guys doing?post #54 of 665/21/13 at 5:47pm
Librarygirl, congrats to your family! Sounds like a lot of positive change, and a lot to keep you busy.
I do like Pre-Seed. I like the ingredients much better than most lubes-- less packed with chemicals. And we definitely plan to continue use after TTC.
I made some changes after reading Making Babies. I'm not 100% sure I did things right, because one of the things I gave up was 2 hour cardio sessions, which always made me feel good when I was doing it and then happy and tired afterwards. But other doctors have confirmed that it can supress ovulation. I paid more attention to my temperature. I didn't go to the sauna or hot tub this winter (also one of my favorite things in the winter ). I wore warmer clothing instead-- made me crave the sauna less. I've really flipped back and forth on the moderate drinking (glass of wine most days of the week) and coffee. Right now I am having wine about 2-3 days a week and one cup of coffee each morning. I went on a hypoallergenic diet for 2 months. I felt better in general and figured out that wheat affects my mood and attention for sure-- no quackery there. I got an A in the class I took this spring and that was the first A I have had in forever. But dairy/caffiene/sugar are big time irritants to my guts. It was super interesting. I'm now eating gluten again for the sake of not being a giant pain, but will quit it again when I am studying for an accrediting exam in June.
So, to answer your question: I am taking prenatals, staying warm but not too warm, working out but not too much, and not eating as much stuff that bothers my stomach. No idea whether any of it will actually make a difference. I have also read that propping your hips up and orgasming at the same time or after the man are good techniques, and that you really don't need to prop up your hips for 20 minutes.
Our big thing right now is that we are talking about fostering. I'm kind of terrified that this background discussion might actually be coming to the foreground, and we might have a foster kid by the end of the year... We are talking to some friends who have done it... Have any of you thought about fostering and/or adopting in addition to having your own?post #55 of 665/22/13 at 8:09amThread StarterQuote:Originally Posted by TeamViddy
Our big thing right now is that we are talking about fostering. I'm kind of terrified that this background discussion might actually be coming to the foreground, and we might have a foster kid by the end of the year... We are talking to some friends who have done it... Have any of you thought about fostering and/or adopting in addition to having your own?
Yes, definitely. I think we'll probably add to our family through foster-to-adoption at some point. Right now, our house wouldn't be approved for fostercare or adoption (DH and I sleep in separate rooms so there isn't an individual room for a foster child to sleep in. Our babies will sleep in my room until we move to a bigger house. We also have doors that don't latch and a moldy basement, but we rent so getting "minor" things fixed is next to impossible from our landlord. Oh, I can't wait to buy a house....). I've always wanted a big family and I worked with so many foster kids when I was doing daycare that it just always felt like something I should do, down the road. You'll have to keep us posted on the process!post #56 of 665/22/13 at 6:53pmQuote:
I'm taking prenatals (rainbow light) and some extra zinc and vitamin E per my midwife's advice. DH is taking the rainbow light mens one multi and maca. I'm charting temps and CM and drinking nettle and red raspberry leaf tea. I'm gluten free anyway because I have Celiac but I've given up sugar and caffeine again. Oh, and I'm doing natural progesterone cream once I confirm ovulation (which is the main reason I chart) until AF comes because I'm a little low and have a really short luteal phase without it.post #57 of 665/23/13 at 3:03amVisiting again...
I have recently been reading about lactation amenorrhea in hopes of finding *something* I can do to get fertile back. I discovered that a lot of the cause of amenorrhea...and other hormonal problems that can cause infertility like LH pulsatiliry...is energy balance. Put simply, we have to have sufficient calories available. Calories can come from consumption or fat, it seems.
The short of it is that if you are thin and don't eat a lot, or exercise a lot, you may have LH issues. I actually went so far as to contact the professor who does this research to understand correctly. She helped me calculate that indeed, I was likely under-feeding myself *despite eating 2350 healthy calories a day*! I'm 26% bodyfat (not that thin!), but I was lifting a lot and nursing. So...food for thought?post #58 of 665/23/13 at 6:03am
Hi Rosie! I remember you. I have been reading a lot about undereating recently. Even if you are not thin, you might still be undereating-- we are taught as women to always restrict our calories, and as you said, 2350 calories can be starvation mode if you are very active. Starvation mode can also cause you to pack on weight.
Librarygirl, we are those people in their 30s who already have a 3 br house and station wagon in anticipation of starting a family, got married, etc., and that baby can't find its way to us! I am pretty sure we would get approved-- we do need to finish making some changes to our bedroom situation and buy a twin bed or two. We were going to do this when I got pregnant-- get a sidecar crib and set up two separate bedrooms so that we have options during the first sleep deprived weeks. Baby's bedroom would be more of a spare bedroom with dresser and changing table, and we could move between the two depending on what we need. But it's easy to do in a weekend-- paint, take the carpet up, and buy a bed. I am super grateful that we have our own home.
The desire to have our own children is complex and differs for each person. As we continue down the road of TTC and reached the medical definition of infertility this month, we had some conversations about where the feelings are coming from. I am feeling like a failure. My body has been strong and served me well, but something isn't working quite right (DH's sperm count, mobility, motility, etc was great, btw). It's an identity issue-- I have two sisters and I was the only one with regular cycles and no apparent hormonal/reproductive problems.
Perhaps the biggest struggle is that ALL of my friends have babies at this point. I am feeling isolated and left behind. We've been discussing fostering for a while, and we know a few couples who do it. When we discussed this we decided that fostering might be a good way to bring a child into our home-- a win/win. There's no indication that the amount of time it's taking to conceive is anything more than an unlucky roll of the dice, and once we start parenting other children our baby will eventually find us again. And based on my conversations with my family and inlaws, the idea has a lot of support...post #59 of 665/23/13 at 10:55am
I'm sorry I don't mean to impose on this thread, although I do miss it a lot. I just wanted to add that if you're having trouble conceiving, don't go paleo:
"We are currently conducting our fifth experiment with this protocol. The first experiment revealed that thyroid hormones (which are low in amenorrheic athletes) are suppressed by low energy availability, and not by exercise stress (Loucks & Callister, 1993). The second experiment showed that this suppression of thyroid metabolism occurs abruptly at a particular threshold of energy availability. The third experiment showed that LH pulsatility, like thyroid metabolism, is disrupted by low energy availability, and not by exercise stress (Loucks & Heath, 1994, Loucks, Verdun, & Heath, 1998). This was true, regardless of whether energy availability was reduced by dietary restriction alone, by exercise energy expenditure alone, or by combinations of diet and exercise regimens. This experiment also contributed new knowledge about leptin (Hilton & Loucks, 2000). Others had hypothesized leptin to be the long-sought chemical messenger by which body fat stores regulate reproductive function. We found that disruptions of LH pulsatility by low energy availability were, indeed, associated with 70% declines in leptin levels, but that body weight declined only 3%. Thus, if leptin is involved in the control of LH pulsatility, leptin is more likely driven by changes in daily energy availability than by changes in fat stores. In this experiment, we also saw evidence that LH pulsatility may depend not on the availability of energy in general, but rather on the availability carbohydrates, which is the preferred metabolic fuel of the brain.
The fourth experiment in this series showed that aggressive refeeding is unable to restore normal LH pulsatility in energy deficient women within twenty-four hours, in contrast to observations in other mammalian species from mice to primates (Loucks & Verdun, 1998). This finding is consistent with the hypothesis that LH pulsatility depends on carbohydrate availability. For the carbohydrate requirement of the human brain is uniquely extreme amongst mammals. In adults, the brain consumes 20% of resting energy metabolism (in children it consumes 50%), in contrast to only 8% in lower primates and 2% in other mammals.
The fifth experiment is investigating the incremental effect of energy availability on LH pulsatility in men and women (Loucks et al., 1998; Loucks et al., 1999; Loucks et al., 2000) So far, we have shown that in women LH pulsatility is disrupted at the same threshold of energy availability at which thyroid metabolism is suppressed. Lower energy availabilities also disrupt LH pulsatility in men, but the magnitude of the effect is smaller, suggesting that in humans as in other mammals the dependence of reproductive function on energy availability operates principally in females. In this same experiment, we are investigating whether biochemical markers of bone metabolism are also disrupted at the same threshold of energy availability.
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