Hello ladies, I'm new to the site but I have lurked for awhile :) I love this site because I can come here and hear people who actually agree with my beliefs instead of insulting them :P
Anyway, I am not pregnant right now so I hope you don't mind me posting here. I do want children in the near future though, and I already know (and have known for years) that I want a homebirth. I am a healthy 24 year old so as long as I can stay healthy, (which I plan to) I think homebirth is the best option for me. The problem? I am so afraid of being criticized or even bullied about it when the time comes. The closer we get to trying for a baby, the more nervous I get about what everyone will say to me when I tell them I want a homebirth.
First of all my mother IS incredibly supportive because a., she went through a traumatic birth with my older brother that caused her to choose a natural birth with my other brother and myself, and b., she used to work as a nurse on the OB ward and saw all kinds of terrible things the doctors would do to women just to make money :( Basically every birth horror story I have read on here, my mother has seen with her own eyes.
My s.o. is pretty supportive of the plan but I get the distinct impression from him that as soon as there's a baby actually on the way, he'll change his tune. Especially if his family works on him about it. He comes from what I consider to be a very over-medicalized family (wonderful people, just very, very different from me in that regard.) He is the least so of all of them, but to give you an idea his mother had epidurals with all of her children and allowed doctors to induce her with him. I actually wonder if she even knows homebirth is a thing, because she so blindly followed her doctor's advice throughout all of her pregnancies. So although I have not yet shared with his parents my plan, I know them well enough that I can imagine the nagging I'll get when they do find out.
Also, my father, (who is a wonderful man, don't get me wrong) is one of those who thinks just because I have a small frame I'll need to "get permission" from a doctor before I try to get pregnant in case my oh-so delicate little hips can't handle it. So you see what I'm up against there. Sigh.
I honestly don't have many friends who I know share my feelings on this either. So I am a little intimidated about what I'll be up against when I do get pregnant and inevitably share my birth plans. I have thought about just keeping quiet about it, but I know his family and mine will ask questions and I really don't want to lie to any of it.
So lovelies, when the time comes, if the people close to me have a problem with my birth plans, how do I politely ask them to mind their own business?