Seraf-- I like having this as a separate thread!
The girls do not have another parent in their lives anymore. It is a bit complicated. Their biological dad was around when the oldest was little, so for a few years, on and off, he was really an active dad for her. Not a good situation, though, he was awful to her mom. He never was around with our youngest--he left before she was born. After that, they saw him maybe one day a year because my wife made it happen, but that didn't always go well and they didn't always want to go. He is an addict and alcoholic and hasn't been able to get clean. He has been using heroin and meth over the past few years, so they haven't been allowed to see him in a few years. Our oldest daughter has expressed being sad that she can't see him, otherwise makes jokes about him (telling her friends he's a "fatty", etc.) I think she just doesn't know how to deal with her feelings around it. Our youngest daughter seemed relieved when they didn't have to visit him anymore, but I think it is confusing to her. She has gone back and forth on whether or not he is her "dad" because he never acted as a dad to her, but her big sister calls him their dad. It's a sad situation. And there were other partners before me--one that our oldest daughter actually called "Mom" for a while. But that was a bad relationship, too, and when she left it affected my wife really intensely, and they didn't keep contact. Other partners were not great relationships, but not so dramatic. So, our oldest daughter has seen a lot of adults walk in and out of her life without seeming to care. I wish she knew how much I do care, and that I am sticking around for good, no matter what. She has told my wife that she thinks if she keeps being so mean to me I will leave. I told my wife she should tell her that if I were going to leave because of how she treats me, I would have left a LONG time ago! Ha.
escher-- how are things with you and your step-dad now? Is there hope for the future?
QOTD-- We have two small dogs (Buddha: brussels griffon/poodle mix, Fancy: brussels griffon/yorkie mix) and a cat (wonderful orange kitty). They all get along swell with each other and with the kids. We'll see how they do with the baby when she comes.........