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mama chat thread-early may

post #1 of 47
Thread Starter 

hey mamas!

 

 

how is your mental and physical well-being? 

 

how is breastfeeding/bottlefeeding going? baby's weight gain?

 

any significant outings with the little one? 

 

 

naomi and i went to the grocery store today. got her in the carseat and to the store, did all my shopping with her in the boba wrap. she fell asleep and plucked her out and back into the carseat and home all without any fussing or tears. it was amazing. daddy has gone all the shopping for me so far, except for when i walk to the little local market for odds and ends with her. i;m so glad she's getting more comfortable just chillin'. 

 

i ordered the baby bjorn babysitter balance, much to my husband's dismay. he can't believe how expensive it is. me neither, but i can't find any on CL or in thrift, so it had to be done.. she keeps trying to stand and needs a bouncy seat so i can do stuff in the kitchen when she doesn't want to be worn. i think she'll love it. god i hope so. 

post #2 of 47

how is your mental and physical well-being? Physically, just fine - aside from the whole BM thing we were talking about the other day. Mentally...honestly, I'm struggling with some PPD. I've had depression on and off since I was a teen, so I know what it looks like. On the bright side, I can still see the bright side most days ;) It's gotten worse with DH away, though, and I'm not sure how to ask for help here. I'm getting out a bit more, heck with LO's nap schedule, she needs a healthy mama. Hopefully that'll help.

 

how is breastfeeding/bottlefeeding going? baby's weight gain? Very much better. I still catch myself worrying about her erratic appetite, but it only hurts when I'm engorged for whatever reason now, and she's well over 13 lbs at 10 weeks!

 

any significant outings with the little one? We got her birth certificate this morning ^_^ I am very proud of nursing at the Vital Records office WITHOUT the huge cover, and while walking from one office to another!

post #3 of 47

Oh, and Kelly - YAAAAAY groceries!!! That's like our biggest struggle; I've started just putting her car seat into the shopping cart so we can avoid her Ergo-induced screaming fits (and how on earth do women load groceries onto the conveyor belt while BW?!? mine won't stay on properly with all the bending up and down). Of course, today some woman came up and told me I was putting my child in danger and someone was going to knock the car seat off the cart. Argh. I didn't tell her I'd checked it, didn't tell her how careful I was being, didn't cry or holler that I'm doing my best as a geographically single mom right now and as a fellow mil wife she should understand....just smiled and said thank you.

 

Anyway, I'm so proud of you!! I know that's a weight off your mind, and your partner is going to be thrilled.

post #4 of 47

how is your mental and physical well-being? 

 

good- all my stress comes from outside the home.  now to minimize that!  my body is soft, but strong and i'm pretty happy w/ it, which is good!  if only my boobs didn't get quite so huge and swollen and i had a bra that really fit....

 

how is breastfeeding/bottlefeeding going? baby's weight gain?

 

he's a champ.  about 14lbs, over 24 inches long, bald, smiley, happy, chatty, he's the best thing ever.

 

any significant outings with the little one? 

 

well, creighton follow-up (1 hour fertility session for charting which is 1 hour away from my home, so 3 hours round trip), lots of shopping w/ all 5 kids (Trader Joe's, a small farm shop, Stop and Shop), farm, bi-weekly homeschool meetings, and Dr's appts followed by shopping.  and yes, it is always intense.  today i parked at the local free-cycle type place where i can get clothes (daughter needed slip-on shoes) and food and household items, walked about 1/2 mile to park, nursed baby, made local mama friends, met friend there and walked back to check out clothes/shoes (found a pair! sterilized them...) and drove home in time for naps!!!  it's always crazy.  he fell asleep in the mei tei today, and nursed under it at the park.  and fell asleep again. he wanted NOTHING to do w/ it when we got home.  looking forward to a light day tomorrow- 1/2 mile walk to homeschool outing, then home across a biodynamic farm.  that's it.  i hope.  

post #5 of 47
Hey all smile.gif

how is your mental and physical well-being?
My mental wellbeing has been iffy, some serious relationship issues with husband. Ended up packing me and DD off to a friend's for a week just to get a break of sorts. Seriously I thought this was the end, I can't see the light at the end if the tunnel sometimes... Physically I'm good, think I put on a few pounds in the past week or so with some stress eating though.. Also going away caused horrible constipation for a couple of days (bowel gets shy away from home) but I think I'm past the worst of it.

how is breastfeeding/bottlefeeding going? baby's weight gain?
Bfing is still going great. Baby's great gma tried her with a bottle since DD was having none of it when I tried, and she still is having nothing to do with either nipples (tried Tommie Tippee Closer to Nature and Phillips Avent). I was looking forward to sometimes being able toi take a day for me and acceot some of the babysitting offers I've had but maye thats just not going to happen for me, at least while she's still nursing... Not sure what she weighs right now but I know she is chunking up nicely.

We had a great day out with a friend a couple of weeks bak (went to a local Goodwill and mall). At the mall we went to a kiddies play area where I NIP sans the receiving blankie I normally use to maintain modesty - it was a vest under a regular shirt day so I was still sufficiently modest but I was proud of myself cuz I did have to latch her on without any covering.

We have done the usual grocery runs (try to put the carseat in the cart but she always ends up screaming and instantly quiets once she's back in her wrap next to momma...

Cat77 (formerly ChocoMom)
post #6 of 47

how is your mental and physical well-being?  So far so good. 

 

how is breastfeeding/bottlefeeding going? baby's weight gain?  Bb is doing really well.  Growing fast... too fast. 

 

any significant outings with the little one?  Every outing is significant.  I forgot how hard it is just to get out of the house.  I can't believe I did it with two little so close in age yrs ago. 

post #7 of 47
Quote:
Originally Posted by kellybeth View Post

hey mamas!


how is your mental and physical well-being? 

how is breastfeeding/bottlefeeding going? baby's weight gain?

any significant outings with the little one? 


naomi and i went to the grocery store today. got her in the carseat and to the store, did all my shopping with her in the boba wrap. she fell asleep and plucked her out and back into the carseat and home all without any fussing or tears. it was amazing. daddy has gone all the shopping for me so far, except for when i walk to the little local market for odds and ends with her. i;m so glad she's getting more comfortable just chillin'. 

i ordered the baby bjorn babysitter balance, much to my husband's dismay. he can't believe how expensive it is. me neither, but i can't find any on CL or in thrift, so it had to be done.. she keeps trying to stand and needs a bouncy seat so i can do stuff in the kitchen when she doesn't want to be worn. i think she'll love it. god i hope so. 

I have that bouncy chair and it's AMAZEBALLS. It's so comfy he's happy to be in it for hours just kicking his legs around. In the most reclined setting they can quite comfortably sleep in it. This was a great option for fussy times with gas or reflux for our LO.
post #8 of 47
I'm feeling pretty good most of the time. Only a few rough days here and there. Which is a lot better than it was in the beginning. Physically I'm good but need to find time to exercise. We do get out for walks more now and I'm hoping she will tolerate them better as we continue. I still have 25lbs to lose to get back to Pre preg weight.

Breastfeeding seems to be going well. She seems happy and healthy. Not chunky by any means but slowly growing. We tried a bottle for the second time yesterday with my mom and she took it for a few minutes. And then finished it off a little later. There was only one ounce in there but it's progress!

No significant outings. We go out occasionally to shop ( not by ourselves yet) and to a mom and baby group and walks. That's about it!
post #9 of 47

how is your mental and physical well-being? 

 

For someone who just had a baby and then moved to the other side of the world I think I can say I'm doing well. I got a little stressed in the last few days before the move and my milk supply dropped a bit which was frustrating for both parties but that went back to normal quickly. I always thought the beer remedy was bullshit but I'm a firm believer now.

 

how is breastfeeding/bottlefeeding going? baby's weight gain?

 

Breast feeding continues to go well and he continues to be happy to take the pacifier when he's grumpy. He's also still doing well with the bottle and will take cold milk even. He's never met a nipple he didn't like. Not surprising that he's a little butterball. He has chubbed out so much in the last few weeks we turfed the 1 month clothes at 3 - 4 weeks and then were turfing the 3 month clothes at 7 weeks! So here we are at 8 weeks old and he's wearing stage 2 diapers and 3-6 month onesies. Insane! 

 

any significant outings with the little one? 

 

Well a week after we got home from Cambodia we moved from Singapore to LA. The 30 hour trip went great. Just slept and nursed the whole way. I have become a diaper changing ninja with all the crazy places I've had to change him. 

post #10 of 47

how is your mental and physical well-being? 

 

physical, i'm getting tired and worn out, starting to feel like i really need a break! its not the baby though, well - other than the fact that i wear him ALL the time, its the 2.5 yr old and my just-turned-5 yr old .. the kids are pulling me in 4 different directions and sometimes i feel like i am barely holding it together.. i never felt like this with 1, 2, or 3 kids, but 4 - oh my - i am hoping its a phase and it will get better.. that pretty much covers my mental well being as well..

 

how is breastfeeding/bottlefeeding going? baby's weight gain?

breastfeeding is the easy part of all this - i've gotten pretty good at it after 7 yrs .. my new little man nurses in the sling while we are out  -i can't count the number of times i've nursed him while grocery shopping with 3 other kids.. someone mentioned unloading groceries while baby wearing, how bout while baby wearing and nursing? yup. it makes me feel very frantic and frazzled .. kind of like i'd feel if my baby was screaming, i don't know why..you'd think it would be nice to have a quiet baby.. anyway - the boy is a chunk, probably around 15-16lbs

 

any significant outings with the little one?

 

we are out all the time, we are constantly going to classes and homeschool field trips and little man gets carted all over the place.. we have hardly been home but things should be slowing down a bit in the next few weeks

post #11 of 47
Thread Starter 
happy mother's day, mamas! and for all of us first time moms -happy first mother's day of the rest of your life. <3
post #12 of 47

Happy Mothers' Day!!

post #13 of 47
Happy Mother's Day!
post #14 of 47

Hey ladies-

 

Liam is officially 3 months or 13 weeks.  Things are going pretty well, although, the girls are still driving me batty and fighting non-stop.  

 

how is your mental and physical well-being? 

 

Physically I am doing great.  Wanting to lose my belly fat and work out more, but I am pretty happy with how I feel and look.  Emotionally, I was super sad that DH was shutting the door to future kids and being so mean about it.... we talked and he still is feeling done, but is not going in for the big V yet and will have a civil discussion with me in a year when we may start thinking about expanding.

 

how is breastfeeding/bottlefeeding going? baby's weight gain?

Breastfeeding is great.  He is very efficient and can get filled up in less than 5 minutes.  He does like to nurse for comfort when he is falling asleep, but will unlatch fairly quickly and stay asleep.  He will NOT take a paci and both girls did, so this is new for us.  He is gaining pretty well too.  Up to 14 lbs, 12 oz (25.5 inches long) started at 9 lbs, 6 oz and 20.5 inches.  At 3 months his sister (DD1) weighed 17 lbs, 4 oz, so he seems light to me.  

 

any significant outings with the little one? 

Wow, we started our outings at 1 week by visiting our local, very flat, very small, zoo.... My mom left at 3.5 weeks and after that, I do pretty much all the shopping and outings with all 3 kids.  I do remember it being very scary and hard to get DD1 out of the house by myself the first time, so you FTM should be proud of the things you are getting done.  Now, with the older kids, I have to get out of the house several times a week for dance class, speech and any playdates (as well as any shopping trips we need to make).  It does feel crazy most of the time, but for all of our sanity, we have to do it.

 

We started using our cloth diapers a few weeks ago and it is going really well.  Clothes fit tighter, but, no blow outs!  He is still pretty content in the Moby, doesn't like the ring sling anymore and will put up with the beco butterfly.  His legs are still a bit small for the Ergo.  He has hit a new developmental milestone of liking his little bounce seat and grabbing all of the hanging toys.  He rolls onto his side from his back and seems like he wants to flip onto his belly.  He has rolled from his belly to his back, but out of sheet hatred of belly time.  

 

Anyways, good to hear from everyone and hope this mother's day is relaxing for everyone.

 

post #15 of 47

Just wanted to add that we are loving the mei tai now!  Had been using the Moby, which is nice-- didn't love the ring sling, though it was okay.  But the mei tai is awesomecakes!  And especially nice as it's cooler than the Moby and it's getting hot out.  Although it's less "poppable" than the Moby and takes slightly more coordination to get her in, it's also sort of faster and firmer, and holds her head in a leaning-straight-back position, which she prefers to sleep in (rather than having to cock her head to one side in the fabric of the Moby, if that makes sense). 

post #16 of 47


how is your mental and physical well-being? 

 

how is breastfeeding/bottlefeeding going? baby's weight gain?

 

any significant outings with the little one? 

 

 

** Ramble warning. I guess I needed someone to talk to! Thanks for reading, if you so choose. I just needed to get it out... **

 

Mentally, I'm somewhere in the clouds - neither here nor there. Mostly happy, or pretending to be; I'm way too self-sufficient and codependent to say I need help - so I'm fine, even when I'm not. (Know what I mean? I just kinda suck it up.) How could life be hard at all with such a sweet one? I love her SO much!!

 

The reason for any ambivalence there is my reluctance to go back to work. DH is pressuring me to return, and I'm cobbling together little parts of my former life to bring in something like the cash I used to earn. (I was always the breadwinner; I saved like heck to allow for three months off, and he's been really "heroic" about providing for us while I'm on leave. Ugh. But at the same time, sweet. Kinda.) I collected bags of unsorted papers from my employer and have been slowly working on categorizing and filing them; I'm due back tomorrow to start on her laundry and household organization. I'll bring Olive, but we visited her and her crazy boys the other week for lunch and Olive got sooo overstimulated; I'm worried about spending too much time there. Hence the paperwork at our apartment. Also, I'm helping my mom with her paperwork and providing her meals for her post-op recovery (she had her gallbladder removed and the surgeon recommended a vegan diet, much to my delight) so she's paying me a little... also, I'm making food for the farmers' market, so hopefully I'll bring in some profit there.

 

That, along with the pile of thank-you cards that I can't seem to wade through (30+ people to thank just from the shower, then another 20 from people that just keep sending things. I never ever wanted this! I get it, it's love; it's just material love and it's hard for me to accept it. And I'm SO bad at thank-you cards; it takes me forever to write them and I just feel guilty every single day. I'm SO grateful for all of the support - it's amazing how loved we are/she is!) and the messy house (I can stand it a little messy; DH can't) and my yearning to just be in the springtime with my babe... it's all got me a little --- overwhelmed, I guess.

 

My sister (the doula that trekked out from CA to help me) has been difficult for me lately, too. She's got a really strong personality and I always forget that we clash. Also, she has some really strong opinions on baby care (rules, "shoulds," schedules, etc.) and was kind of offended when I didn't take much of her advice. Whoops. I need to think of a (cheap!) way to genuinely thank her for coming out before she leaves in four days...

 

I'd wanted to start a blog for Olive since I learned I was pregnant, and I finally started it - and wrote half of the first post. That feels good. I've learned to lower my expectations. ;)  I have a paper journal for her, too, and I've tried to be better about writing in it, even if it's just a few totally unprofound words.

 

My body is feeling soft. I'm still -5 lbs prepregnancy, but I feel like my lower belly has filled out and gotten gushier. My midwife said I have a bit of diastasis recti, so I have an excuse to do ab work, but I find myself caring less and less. Also, DH has been hounding me, and I have absolutely no desire to dtd, so maybe it's kind of a deterrent for me (for him to me) - even though it doesn't work. He seems to see something lustworthy in my body, even though I see it as a soft nurturing vehicle right now, not a sexual object, and that's totally fine with me. I just feel a little guilty that I'm so turned off. He's been super needy lately, which is tough too. (Not so attractive for me.)

 

Guilt has always been a theme in my life... no surprise it's hitting hard right now. I'm feeling guilty about not providing financially, about not contributing to my marriage, about not being socially responsive. I don't feel guilty about leaving Olive, because I haven't yet and I don't plan on doing so anytime soon. She's been apart for me for maybe 15 minutes, max - when DH took her on neighborhood walks, twice so far - and I was beside myself the whole time, wondering if she was okay. DH isn't comfortable with her yet (or himself, but that's another issue - we're dealing with that right now, too, ugh) and she can feel it, so she always works herself up with him. I know that more time alone together would help them, ultimately, but until they reach that point (and until DH works on his self-love and confidence) it's gonna be hard-hard-hard for all three of us. We need therapy, man.

 

 

 

Breastfeeding is a dream. Really. It's our favorite thing! We're super comfy with NIP anywhere, thank goodness. I've been pumping sporadically since she was seven weeks old, and offered the bottle a couple of times. I'll get serious about it when I'm serious about possibly leaving her. I'm not worried, though - she takes it well enough that if she needed to have it, she'd be fine. I was really psyched about pumping to donate (or sell - would be great for the income - is there a premium for organic whole-foods vegan bm? I don't even know how to get started) but I felt like my supply dropped from its crazy happy oversupply to just enough for Olive. It's a lot of work to create oversupply, man! Pumping, oatmeal, teas... there's already so much to keep on top of. I don't know how you do it, mamas. (I'm looking at you, HOP, with your amazing pumping sessions!)

 

Speaking of keeping on top of things - EC. I'd really wanted to be on top of it, but I find myself only doing it super casually. Another guilty disappointment!

 

Baby's gaining beautifully. I'm so proud! She's chunky and delicious. She was 12 lbs at seven weeks, and (at 11 weeks now) I feel like she's got to be closer to 14 lbs. Crazy. She's in six-, nine-, and some twelve-month clothes. We're going to have to hit up the consignment & thrift stores soon, before the grandmothers threaten to buy brand-new stuff for her.

 

 

 

Out. We go out all the time. I get restless if it's nice out! Lots of walks, groceries, library visits and coffee shops. DH works at a nature preserve so sometimes we bring him lunch and have a picnic by the creek. We've been exploring all of the local outdoor activities that we never had time (or "touristy " curiosity/shamelessness) to check out before. She's a champ in the car, and mostly we go out by ourselves, though it's nice to have DH on hand occasionally behind the wheel so that I can dive into the backseat to nurse her in her seat if she's upset on long car rides. I've attached Command hooks to my car ceiling and draped one of her light blankets strategically as a sunshade, and used another one to dangle a soft toy in batting reach. (Huge win.)

 

Olive's a chattering, giggling nut. She's super strong and loves to stand up for minutes on end with our hands balancing her. I'll sit on the exercise ball and bounce, singing and holding her on my knees, and she'll pump her legs up and down at the same time, laughing hysterically. She still greets the days with such riotous joy that it's changed my perspective on mornings.

 

She's had two red fits in the past week, though, which makes me think maybe early teething. Out of nowhere: shrieking, fist in her super-drooly mouth, pummeling, writhing. It passes after about ten minutes, but it's sooo unlike her. She also chomped down on me with her gums. So not excited about a real bite! Time to order her amber necklace, anyway...

 

 

 

(So far this has taken me two days to write... I'll just post already!)

 

I'm due back at work today -- my own assignment, not DH's - I wanted to ease into it slowly so that I could try to make money before it became a crisis -- and find myself thinking of excuses not to go in. I honestly don't know how I'll get anything done with her.

 

Yesterday, Olive gave me the best Mothers' Day gift: she slept in her bouncy seat for a full half hour while I took a bath! (We were going to bathe together, but she fell asleep as I was drawing the water. I just turned up the hot spigot, laid her in her seat next to the tub, and fell away into the longest moments of mommy bliss!) I washed my hair, shaved, and even got to put deodorant & body oil on and stuff in my hair before she woke up. DH was amazed, and so was I!

 

Happy (belated) Mothers' Day to all of you amazing mamas! <3

post #17 of 47
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sgsnyder View Post

 

My body is feeling soft. I'm still -5 lbs prepregnancy, but I feel like my lower belly has filled out and gotten gushier. My midwife said I have a bit of diastasis recti, so I have an excuse to do ab work, but I find myself caring less and less. Also, DH has been hounding me, and I have absolutely no desire to dtd, so maybe it's kind of a deterrent for me (for him to me) - even though it doesn't work. He seems to see something lustworthy in my body, even though I see it as a soft nurturing vehicle right now, not a sexual object, and that's totally fine with me. I just feel a little guilty that I'm so turned off. He's been super needy lately, which is tough too. (Not so attractive for me.)

 

Breastfeeding is a dream. Really. It's our favorite thing! We're super comfy with NIP anywhere, thank goodness. I've been pumping sporadically since she was seven weeks old, and offered the bottle a couple of times. I'll get serious about it when I'm serious about possibly leaving her. I'm not worried, though - she takes it well enough that if she needed to have it, she'd be fine. I was really psyched about pumping to donate (or sell - would be great for the income - is there a premium for organic whole-foods vegan bm? I don't even know how to get started) but I felt like my supply dropped from its crazy happy oversupply to just enough for Olive. It's a lot of work to create oversupply, man! Pumping, oatmeal, teas... there's already so much to keep on top of. I don't know how you do it, mamas. (I'm looking at you, HOP, with your amazing pumping sessions!)

 

She also chomped down on me with her gums. So not excited about a real bite! Time to order her amber necklace, anyway...

 

i'm sorry about your relationship trouble right now. things are always harder after a baby and hubby isn't first anymore. just talk. the other mamas in this group are great for advice on that...

 

as far as your hub wanting to dtd and you not wanting to-same boat. i've caved 3 times since birth just to get him to leave me alone but i'm having image issues and generally feel gross/unattractive. and hubby keeps trying to grab my now huge boobs and i'm all offended like, this is our baby's food, you animal! lol guys and boobs, i swear.

 

as far as bm donation, i just found a mom to donate though via my local "human milk 4 human babies" on facebook. there is also "eats on feets" you can check out, too. i don't know what you have to go through to get paid for you milk via a bank, i'm just donating. organic vegan milk here, too.

 

naomi chomped down on me with her gums a few weeks ago. hurt like whoa. ordered a raw unpolished baltic amber teething necklace back in january. it was registered mail that i had to sign for and of course it was attempted to be delivered the day i went into labor... it's STILL at the post office. only been 12 weeks. ehh

 

mama you're doing great! just take it easy. it seems like writing this post really helped unload a little. write more! easier said than done, but just try it.

 

write your sister a nice note. give a little baby footprint on it. cheap and adorable. 

 

love to you!

post #18 of 47

Sorry all you mamas are having relationship troubles.  The transition from 0-1 was REALLY hard for us.  We both loved DD1 so much and each other, but making the puzzle pieces fit together can be challenging.  Try to be gentle to each other and to yourselves.  

 

I just wanted to come on here and say.... Liam rolled over today... as in, back to belly.  He had attempted dozens of times and fully rolled over at least once today.  OMG.  He just turned 3 months old.  DD1 started crawling at just over 5 months...we shall see how this little man does.

post #19 of 47
Thread Starter 

i just saw this today. i really wish i had known about the nuroo earlier! http://nuroobaby.com

post #20 of 47

Kellybeth- that does look awesome!  DS is just about 15 lbs now, so he would be too big.  What a great idea, especially for tiny babies!

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