I am finding it hard to find info about parenting young adults who have been raised with the kind of mothering found on this forum. I have fraternal twins (23 years old) and a singleton (turned 25 yesterday), all boys. I was a single mother for 14 years, starting when the boys were 3 and 4 years old. We have a blended family now.
I breastfed my boys until they chose to wean (2-4 years old). I raised my boys in a very nurturing, respectful environment. They were not left with anyone they did not have a trusting relationship with and I respected and nurtured their very individual personalities. Even though, they were all very strong personalities, I have not had one minute of disrespect from them. They did well in school (B students), were involved in extra curricular activities, have very nice girlfriends, have a strong work ethic and are leaders in their peer groups. They have never been in trouble. They are have not been perfect but I would worry if they had been! It's just the things they did were so minor compared to other kids we knew.
The problem I have is that I am very different from the other parents. I am continuing to parent my boys in a way that provides support but encourages them to stretch themselves and go out in the world, knowing that I am always there for them, just like I have done all their lives. As they were growing up, I would encourage them to try new things and test them for their readiness, but if they weren't ready to move forward, I loved and nurtured them until they were ready.
Now they all are in their last years of university (some struggles but all will graduate). They all have long term relationships with wonderful young women who are smart, respectful and a joy to be with. They are a blessing to me, after living my life with all men!
I joined the La Leche League when my first son was born and I eternally grateful to the women who ran that group and showed me a different way of child rearing. I believe that, if I hadn't met them, I would have raised my children the way I was raised (old school).
I would love to hear from Moms who have parented this way and to hear how their children are as young adults. Do you believe that it makes a difference as the children grow up?
Many blessings, Jamie