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No one is listening, doctors and dh making me depressed

post #1 of 4
Thread Starter 

OK so I have been hovering for the last couple of months, BTW you ladies are awesome, got lots of great info from here. Anyways this will be our first planned up/uc. Ds1 was a birth center water birth w/midwife and Ds2 was supposed to be the same but end up an unplanned unassisted on my moms sofa (my mom freaked,lol). So I started getting some bad vibes about two weeks ago and I have been doing  home urine tests for a week now. I  tested positive for protein and leukocytes. I assumed (correctly) that it was a UTI so I started d-mannose and garlic. My levels were decreasing but then I got really sick (fever, fatigue, back pain, etc.) and tested positive for billirubin. So the next day not wanting to take any chances (and needing peace) I told DH that I would go get checked out at the ER and he would need to watch the kiddos. Sounded like a good planthumb.gif


Here is where the trouble comes. DH seemed like he thought I was over reacting. I felt like I had no support and I had to defend myself. After being in the waiting room for an hour he calls saying the kids were crying. I was pretty emotional about about the whole ordeal so I told him to just come and pick me up. In the car he just kept saying things like "don't get mad at me" and "You said this was important" Again being in and emotional state needing love and support ( which I had already informed him) I felt like he was not listening to me. So after getting the kids to bed I went back to the ER. Again no one was listening to me except it was the opposite of dh's reaction.It seemed like they were trying to scare me  by telling me I could be in labor. They asked me if I had any bleeding and after telling them NO several times they kept saying they had to check me, like I was lying. They did not even really look up there they just opened my legs (like I was to stupid to tell)  I completely understand why they where nervous but I also got a bad vibe off of them like they just wanted to show me how stupid I was for ucing. They also kept telling me I was 26 weeks when I'm only 23. I told them several times that my period was irregular and I did not ovulate until later, and that I did not get a positive test until 12 dpo. The nurse looked at me and said no you are 26 weeks! To top that off she tried to find the top of my uterus and reached to high ( where 26 weeks would be) and had to lower her hand (I have been measuring on point for 23 weeks) I got negative vibes and comments all night.


Anyways I guess I just needed a place to be heard, sorry for the long rant. All my test came back great which gave me much needed peace of mind. I just feel like I spent a whole night being told I was stupid by both the uc and medical side when all I wanted was to get checked out! I trust my body deeply,take notice of any bad vibes/signs and try to make good decisions based on the info I have, so why is everyone acting like I'm a lunatic?

post #2 of 4
I have no uc experience, but with my food issues I have had to deal with medical personnel and family not being supportive. That's why your title caught my attention.

What a lousy night!!! On the upside, as you said, you got the peace of mind you were seeking. Too bad it couldn't have been given without all that stress! I'm glad you took care of yourself!

Congratulations on the pregnancy, and I hope everything is smooth sailing from here on out! You will be in my thoughts, and I'll send positive thoughts your way (to counter those giving you negative vibes). Take care!
post #3 of 4
Thread Starter 

Thanks, I could use it :) Had a chance to calm down, and like you said I got what I wanted so I think I will just focus on the positive of that!om.gif.

post #4 of 4

Sorry to hear you had such a rough time of it. I so often wish men could just offer the assistance we want (in your case, taking care of the little ones while you have your concerns checked out), without a full, in-depth explanation! So glad it all worked out OK for you.

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