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Taking the Scenic Route to a BFP - Sping/Summer 2013 - Page 9post #161 of 5936/22/13 at 1:29pmpost #162 of 5936/22/13 at 2:28pmshell - they are beautiful! you give me hope!
afm - started clomid today. having a very rocky start to this cycle. last cycle was weird and long, this period was just some scant spotting, my hormone levels are all in decent range but my afc is frickin zero (usually 7 or 8) so i have no idea what's up but we're moving forward... expectations low. other than that, dh is getting us set up to start watching big brother next week, live feeds and all. perfect mindless summer television to keep me from cowering in the corner and sucking my thumb. next appt is not until next sat. a whole week of no feedback. oy.post #163 of 5936/22/13 at 4:00pmShe'll they look gorgeous - glad everything went really well... And am so impressed with your happy calm! Stick embabies stick!
Sherry - keep hanging in there! Are you planning any fun holidays for the future or anything to distract from your decision making?
Chrissy - lol how are you holding up? I'm relaxed but focussing on every little symptom - it's easier than finding stuff to distract me...
Indie - hugs you're coping so well... I think hardcore viewing of big brother will make for a great distraction... Then you just need a butler to serve you so you don't have to move lol (maybe get dh to dress up) Ok so I'm a bit crazy... Going to see the out laws today - which is fine but their fav food out is sushi... And we're always there during my tww lol so selection is hard! Can you pretend this week off from monitoring is like a holiday? Do something that will distract you thoroughly... Wish I was there to give you a hug...
TF - how are you going? Hope you are traveling with sanity... Your next check up is next week right?
Afm - nothing exciting, a little twingy, weird dreams (normal for me lol) so just trying to stay zen and google like someone possessed... Trying to find articles you've not already read is hard lol
Something ridiculous to read...
Edited by chuord - 6/22/13 at 4:12pmpost #164 of 5936/22/13 at 7:26pmThread Starter
Chuord - Lol on something to read. I enjoyed that. Also holding in there. Can start testing tomorrow (10dpo) but pretty sure it's a no go this month. Only 2 symptoms is peeing a lot and hunger. Step away from Google!
Shell - Gorgeous embabies! Glad it went well.
Indie - Hugs my friend. Never watched Big Brother.
TF, Sherry, Bebe, Lucille, Adie - Hugs to you guys. Hope all is well.
AFM - Drinking more = peeing more but I don't think I'm putting in as much as what's coming out. lol Get to test tomorrow. So happy with myself for holding out to 10dpo. Usually I'd break and start with 7dpo. lol Not feeling it this cycle.post #165 of 5936/23/13 at 11:56amThread Starterpost #166 of 5936/23/13 at 1:22pmpost #167 of 5936/23/13 at 2:00pmpost #168 of 5936/23/13 at 5:29pmChuord- we are experiencing small gestational sac syndrome for a second time. Basically the baby is growing & the sac is not. They expect as it is even smaller this time than last time that the baby will pass in the next few days. I'll be checked again Wednesday & then schedule d &c to have genetic testing done. After we will begin a panel of RPL testing to try and find a cause.
Chrissy & jpack- there's still oodles of hope that its too early, I'll keep that hope alive for you.
Indie- a week feels like an eternity when we need answers!
AFM- this is such a strange experience. In a way it reduced so much guilt from last time, all the things I wondered if caused our troubles. Thus time I didn't miss a dose of anything, didn't stop anything, took every precaution & same result. In a way I feel like last time we were so hopeful we were jaded to the reality small gestational sac syndrome. This time it's like every day I wonder if baby is still alive & have tried to experience as much happiness & joy to show her how much love we have for life & each other, let her have whatever moments her heart is beating as happy ones. Realistically I know baby is just a 10mm blob of cells, the heart tissue beating bug no senses or whatnot but my hope is that some if our love is making it in. I know the heartbreak is waiting as my hormones crash when this is over. I constantly worry about what else is wrong with me that I my babies want to grow but the sac just doesn't. I'm trying to have faith and control my fears, wait for answers, information. In calming down from the stress that we've experienced a rare miscarriage condition twice & ruling out IVF for eternity. We have decided to revisit our options after the testing is complete & after seeing our naprotechnology doctor at the end of August. It is hard to say I'll never do IVF again and accept that our 'timeline' is endless, I'm an immediate gratification kinda girl so we will see.post #169 of 5936/23/13 at 8:08pmTf - I'm so sorry there's nothing I can say or do to express how much.
I'm so impressed by your calm attitude, truly impressed, I also understand and agree with all the thoughts you are having re the process... Just don't make any 'definite' decisions until after all the testing... Nobody deserves to have that heartache once let alone twice, sending all three of you love and energy through this time... I know it will happen sometime, she's tried twice and I can't see her giving up on you yet... Keep that faith xxpost #170 of 5936/23/13 at 10:24pmpost #171 of 5936/24/13 at 4:56amBiggest hugs Tf.
Very nice Shell. Keep calm and be sticky.
Jpck and Chrissy. Keep on poas. Its early. I know it feels like doom.
Chourd nice links. I am near you...I think 6dpo. Aiming to test Friday. You?
Indie...hang in there. What's big brother?
AFM well back in the woods. 6dpo or so. Readjusting to my surroundings. Trying to be still inside
Hi everyone else.post #172 of 5936/24/13 at 5:39amSherry - I'm 8dpo today, but I have a 14 lp lol so Sunday... Lol who am I kidding, I'll take some tests on holiday and start poas early to join in lol... Fx for you!
Shell - hope you're keeping your zen...
Adie, Lucille, SKJ, sila - anyone got anything to distract us with lol...
Hugs all around you wonderful strong amazing ladies!post #173 of 5936/24/13 at 7:06amI'm 10 dpo today- I'm out though- temps dropped for the last 4 days (nice LP, right?!). I am going to stop the crinone after today- I HATE dragging out the crappy end of a cycle. I had been really optimistic (wtf, how am I still so deluded?) I guess I thought maybe oing so late (cd 23) or all the endorphins or the PNW air (thanks so much, Indie, btw and for the support!). I feel like this city is teeming with pregnant ladies and babies. Oh well. And eff wondfos! I have had a bunch of real, discernible second line appear as they dry. Like, dh was convinced.
Geez- I'm a real Debbie downer today. I'm going in to campus but only to help with students' papers. I need some alone time!
Indie, I'm really looking forward to hearing about this cycle of yours. Your long cycle, was it from the priming? Weird about your afc. I'm sorry it wasn't a more inspiring scan! I'm still excited to follow along- I have everything crossed for you!
Chuord fixed for your tests over the next few days!
TF- love coming your way- hope you're hangin' in there today!
Chrissy -high five!
Sorry about the afm first- but it's indicative of my foul mood. And one really, really weird thing is that it makes me want to go home! I'm obsessed with Portland usually- cant get enough (the coffee, the mountains, the coast, the hikes, the food, the coffee...) but right now, it feel like a hard place to just be grumpy and frustrated. Nothing a good looking bike commute and some espresao can't fix,right?!post #174 of 5936/24/13 at 7:54am
hi my friends.
so sorry for all the bfns... hoping at least one of them turn into a positive!
toothfairy - your post was so sweet. i love the thought of you showing your baby how much you love her and each other and life. that brought tears to my eyes. what a wonderful soul you are.
jpack - i'm sorry the PNW air didn't do its magic this time around. espresso sounds like a perfect pick-me-up.
sherry - hope you are hanging in there back in the woods. 6dpo... i know this is the time where we all start getting antsy. wishing the best for you. big brother - a silly reality show (you can google it... I don't think I could succinctly explain it!) it's something i would have never thought I would interested in but we were bored last summer and started watching it and got totally hooked. hopefully it's as fun to watch this year...
chrissy - any chance that bfn will turn into a bfp?
chuord - love your positive messages. hoping you get a nice surprise in a couple of days!
afm - the cycle drama continues. turns out I started my REAL period yesterday. So I'm actually CD2 today and not CD5. Which means I started clomid earlier than I was supposed to. I don't *think* this will be a bad thing since my scan didn't show any cysts and my blood work came back showing all of my hormones were suppressed as they should be... have a call in to the doctor to find out if/how my date for adding in FSH will change. Oy. Still not sure what contributed to a 33 day cycle but at least I'm feeling better about my non-existent AFC. I think being scanned two days early was the reason why nothing was visible. what a ridiculous roller coaster!post #175 of 5936/24/13 at 2:16pmJpack - I totally get it, Portland is a happy place for you and it makes you grumpy that the bfn downer has to mess with your vibe... Vent all you need to - we love you heaps and share the disappointment... I love how full of energy and revitalized you've been since starting this job... Thanks for watching for the rest of us to test - I totally agree as unstressed as I am at the mo, it's the not knowing that frustrates me...
Sherry - did you leave the woods or have you pitched a tent and moved in - I would so be tempted...
Indie - you are balancing this whole experimenting on your body with dif drugs soo well - I just needed you to know I'm really impressed... Fx they get it just right soon.
So big brother, they make it in the usa? Our australian season is about to start... Ironically it's filmed at the gold coast (where the inlaws are) I've watched it before years ago... But they tend to pick the dregs of society here... Two guys started a media furor when they 'turkey slapped' a sleeping girl (slapped her in the face with their penises) lol so all class here!
Chrissy - how's it going with you? Did you get a date for ds second assessment?
Hugs everyone!! I love waking early and lying in bed reading about your news... Such a great start to the day!
Afm - I haven't tested, I'm not feeling any urge to at all weirdly... Yesterday (8dpo) may have had some implantation spotting - but then I spot before AF, so as usual while I feel hopeful I'm not allowing myself to get enthusiastic as its probably just the normal stuff in disguise.post #176 of 5936/24/13 at 6:08pmThread Starter
TF - I love that you're letting baby girl know how loved she is. My heart goes out to you guys.
JPack - Sorry you're in a foul mood. I hope it got better.
Chuord - FX for you!!
Indie - Hope your drugs get fine tuned!
Sherry - Don't get lost in the woods!
Let's see: Jpack 10dpo, Chuord 8dpo, Sherry 6dpo, Chrissy 11dpo. Wow! So close together. If I get a bfp it won't be until 12 or 14dpo.post #177 of 5936/24/13 at 8:11pm
TF: I am so sorry that this is happening again!! I would just scream until I couldn't scream anymore, I am praying for answers... and for the sac to grow!!
JP: I am sorry your temp dropped... I have been reading that temp really doesn't matter... I hope you enjoyed your bike ride and espresso
Chourd : exciting!!! 8dpo so close to testing :-) saying prayers
Indie: that happened to me before (with the clomid and period) dr. said it was no biggie... other than My eggs did seem to be bigger that cycle ;-) This is just a horrible roller coaster I so agree!!
Sherry: I meditate to a image of your woods... and you sitting in them with beads and babies lol ... I am jealous of those woods!! I need to try and be still inside UGH not working.
Chrissy: Sorry for the ugly BFN :-(
Bebe: Did you finally have the baby?? I can't wait to see pics!!
AFM: welp, I am not in zen LOL stressing over the stupidest things like... is it ok to sleep on my tummy? does it mean I am not pregnant because I am not constipated? is it ok to lay on my left side or right side? it feels like my uterus dropped, is that bad? my temp is only 98.11 is that too low? and sometimes it is in the 97's Does my de caffeinated tea have caffeine in it still? ... YEP that is me one huge stress ball... I literally layed in bed from Friday until this morning only to get up to pee. today I have been up and about, because my dog went in to labor and I rushed her to the vet... 6 puppies 3 boys 3 girls :-) healthy mommy. Symptoms are probably from the progesterone and estrace, sore boobs (somedays worse than others) and I have been real gassy (not pleasant) and today I have been crampy,,, I also have been lashing out at DH everytime he doesn't jump when I say so.. HORRIBLE moody. I cried at him today telling him this is all his fault that I am so stressed out because he is the one who said this is our last shot!! I know I shouldn't have, but I did. So I am trying to just remain calm and focus on the puppies now... they are so tiny and cute... well Daddy is only 4 lbs and mommy is only 6 lbs... Mommy is full blood Shih Tzu and daddy is full blood mini yorkie. So anyone have any good news? anything positive? I feel like AF is coming and I am really stressed UGHpost #178 of 5936/24/13 at 10:47pmShell - what is your all time favourite comedy chic flick? Maybe chill out bear the puppies and watch it? Although small things can affect pgy next, I reckon anytime you get worried think about all those people that drink, smoke, have 12 cups of caffeine a day, move house, fall over, work a physical job, that get pregnant and have a healthy baby... I hope it helps deprogram your panic - in reality you are doing an awesome job at making a home for those babies... Keep telling yourself that too... Btw I did some energy work on all three of you... Hope it helps xxxpost #179 of 5936/25/13 at 4:20amGood morning everyone.
Why is it that on the rare day that you can sleep in...you can't sleep.
Jack. Sorry for your bfn and stress. What's Portland like besides the coffee options haha.
Indie. I'm glad your at least on the roller coaster and not standing in the cue. Even if your cycle doesn't make sense I hope its working. Clomid early is supposed to make more follicles ripe rather than make one big....so.....come on follies!
Chrissy. I'm glad you still have time.
Chourd. Good for naturally occurring patience. So what's your long range plan with everything. Are you heading towards ivf as well? Is it covered there?
Shelley. I had guessed you were lying very still somewhere. Or standing on your head somewhere. I get moody from my naturally occurring hormones. I can't imagine being super charged like that. I hope your but feels better. How exciting about the puppies!! His sweet. I was just looking at some little breeds like that during the night. Its one of my things to Google instead of TTC things...its all part of my rehab.
AFM well. I am in the woods as related to having left Brooklyn and drove back here Sunday. I'm hoping to go for a nice long walk before the baby comes at 11. I am armed with tests. 3 frer. 3 cheapies....I am going to cheaply tomorrow and Thursday just simply to keep myself from frer wasting. I know it makes no sense but sometimes we must just Indulge. Frer Friday sat ...I am usually a 12 day lap so I should know by then what's up. Then....well its time to hang it up. Do just staying busy. Trying a new recipe. Refinishing some estate sale finds. I may feel stupid next week but I just don't want to bang myself around by doing the heavier things. Dd is making her special spot in the woods too with a lean too and rope swing.
Bebe...anyone hear?? I know she had an OB appt Thursday...but no word. Today would be 9 days post dates.post #180 of 5936/25/13 at 11:04am
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