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Mothering › Groups › October 2013 Due Date Club › Discussions › Telling the boss

Telling the boss

post #1 of 9
Thread Starter 

So I've held off on telling the boss because I was scared of having a loss and not wanting him to know... but now its getting to the point I pretty much have to tell him... I've had several people outside of work ask me if I'm expecting so I guess I must be showing enough for people to tell. Plus even if we lost baby at this point it wouldn't be a quick D&C where I could get away with only missing 1 day of work like last time. So anyway, how exactly does one tell their boss? We don't really talk much and I'm thinking of emailing him. Is email inappropriate? I'm 19 weeks now. Does that seem like a good time to tell him? Or should I hold off a few weeks longer?

post #2 of 9

I'd probably tell now or when you hit 20 weeks exactly. I told my managers at 12 weeks I think. I just went to each of their offices (my immediate manager and then the one above him) and said something along the lines of "So, I wanted to let you know, since it will soon become pretty obvious, I'm pregnant. I'm due in mid-October. I plan on taking the usual FMLA 12 weeks, but I do plan to come back full-time after that." They're both nice enough guys and said congrats and all that. I asked the higher manager what I needed to do to get ready for maternity leave and he said to contact HR. I assume he's begun considering how to get coverage while I'm gone, but we haven't really had any further discussions about it. I wasn't apologetic about it or wishy-washy about taking maternity leave. I'm entitled to have a baby, and I'm entitled to that leave! smile.gif

post #3 of 9

With my first pregnancy, once I told my boss, they cut all my hours, though they didn't officially fire me for the pregnancy. I got a different job, and I didn't tell them until they asked.

post #4 of 9
With my 3, I told work at 14-18 weeks. Simple, just "We're expecting a baby, so I'm anticipating being out of the office for a period of x time around x time of year. To prepare, I have been writing up instructions for my back-up, documenting xyz, etc."

I get really nervous telling each time, but I've never had a problem. smile.gif
post #5 of 9
Originally Posted by revolting View Post

With my first pregnancy, once I told my boss, they cut all my hours, though they didn't officially fire me for the pregnancy. I got a different job, and I didn't tell them until they asked.

Wow. Just...wow. That is so not right.

post #6 of 9
Thread Starter 

Oh my gosh Revolting that is terrible!!!


I am going to try and tell him today! I am so nervous. I am pretty sure he knows though. He has done two double takes of my belly today.

post #7 of 9
Same thing happened to me too revolting.
I told my employers around 12 weeks. 2 weeks later I was told that my part time position was being eliminated, but they were going to keep me on as a prn employee (pretty slick of them). Of course they never called me to work any hours after that.
post #8 of 9

After my sister told about her pregnancy the whole office was basically resentful of her.  After her maternity leave they stopped giving her any meaningful projects...  It was a pretty bad experience in general.  I had a slightly different experience in that I started a seasonal job working for a local non-profit last last year. They gave me nothing but praise and told me how excited they were for me to come back this year.  Well, they made the seasonal job a year-round job and then made me re-apply for it in April.  Seeing as the boss's daughter now has my old job I'm not sure if it was my pregnancy, which I told them about immediately, or nepotism, or that they were full of cr$% last year with all their praise.  Whatever the reason, I ended up feeling like I had been fired which blew. 


I've also known plenty of women who had no issues with telling their bosses and were able to continue their jobs no problem.

post #9 of 9
Thread Starter 

Wow! I can't believe how poorly some employers react! Although my boss sometimes drives me nuts he's a really really nice guy. I was so scared to tell him!! I finally told him Tuesday. At first he seemed a little surprised, but congratulated me. And I thought that was it. Then later in the day he came to my office just to again congratulate me and tell me not to worry at all and that we would get it all worked out. Because I work at a small company he doesn't technically have to give me any maternity leave. But he is really is a nice guy and probably will give me 6 weeks paid anyway as thats what he did for my coworker last year (though I know he doesn't have to pay me and I won't be upset if he doesn't... it will probably depend on how business is going at the time). Then after that I am hoping I can take a few more than 6 weeks off and just not be paid for them which is what my coworker did. I would LOVE to take 3 months... but I know thats kind of a lot around here and will depend on if business is slow or busy. I just feel so relieved now that everyone knows! I can stop wearing baggy sweaters and start wearing cute maternity dresses!

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