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When do we use the crib??? - Page 2

post #21 of 52
My son slept in a pack n play next to my bed or in my bed for the first year of his life. Moving him into his own room at a year was no biggie and I think we all slept better after that. He's 2.5 and just got his toddler bed! Tell daddy your baby needs you and will be better off close.
post #22 of 52
Hi! I Have 3 girls. My baby is now 3 months old and I just put her in her crib. She didn't like it at first so, my husband and I bought a really cute crib mobile and she loves it , it plays music for 40 minutes and we put a monitor/camera - these new monitors are all visual now, so, we can hear her and see her. We put her in her crib as much as possible everytime she falls asleep and now she learned how to soothe herself and put herself to sleep. Your baby's colic/ gas should resolve close to 3 months. I did chamomile tea with my baby but not too much- gave her diarrhea :/ I used the bassinet until she reached wt limit 15 lbs that was at 2 1/2 months. I recommend you use bassinet until baby reaches wt limit and then start using crib. Try the crib mobile ( they have great ones at "buy buy baby" and you will love those new monitors , you can hear and see everything , even night vision ;D
post #23 of 52
. This is a pic of crib mobile
post #24 of 52

Hi, Having recently attended a seminar on brain development, I thought I ought to reply to your question.  Personally, we co-slept with our two girls from the time they were born and loved it.  As I breastfed both of them, having them in bed with us meant that I didn't have to get up and could easily get back to sleep myself.  Our youngest had terrible gas and projectile vomiting for the first 9 months of life and screamed every night for about 4 hours straight mecry.gif.  This was not an easy time for us, and I eliminated a lot from my diet, but we got through it by taking it in turns to rock and soothe her.  Our girls moved into their own room at the ages of 6 and 8, respectively, though they still have very fond memories of snuggling together and both intend to have a family bed when they have their own children.  No matter what you choose to do, co-sleeping, keeping the baby in the bassinet or in a crib, I highly recommend that you have the baby in the same room as you and that when he wakes, you attend to his needs.  This is not only best for SIDS prevention, but also for brain development.  The whole idea of putting babies on a schedule and letting them cry it out was developed during the Industrial Revolution as mothers began working outside the home.  However, it was not done in the best interest of the baby. 

Thanks to MRI scanning, we can now see the effects of different forms of parenting and how they impact on brain development.  What researchers have been learning is that the bottom of the brain, the brain stem (the survival part of the brain) develops first and plays centre stage for the first 6 months of a baby's life.  Babies that are left to cry it out and young ones up to the age of 3 years whose needs are not being met will have an aroused brain stem and it will grow larger than necessary, as the message it gets is that it can't rely on others and must fend for itself.  This then has an affect on other parts of the brain, especially the cortex, the learning/thinking part of the brain that plays centre stage from the age of 3 to 25 years.  If parents have their babies self-soothe at sleep time, but then meet all of the other needs of their little ones, the effects of the slightly enlarged brain stem will not really be noticed.  However, those babies and young ones who are severely abused or neglected in the early stages of their lives develop quite a large brain stem in relation to other parts of the brain and are actually incapable of developing much of the front cortex.  This is due to an excessive level of the stress hormone, cortisol, having been released, which damages the cortex and affects the ability of the brain to set up neural pathways.  Excessive cortisol and an enlarged brain stem not only affect learning/thinking, but also to the ability to reason, control emotions and empathize.  It can also lead to alcohol and drug abuse, as well as violence later in life. 

On the other hand, babies and young ones under the age of 3 years who are not left to self-soothe, and who have all of their needs met by loving parents/caregivers, develop a smaller brain stem, are calmer, have higher levels of endorphins (the positive, learning hormones) and are therefore able to better develop the other parts of their brains - the cerebellum (the movement brain), the limbic system (the emotional brain) and finally the cortex.  What those studying the brain have been learning is that the environment one experiences during the first 3 years of life is crucial to brain development and hence everything else in one's life, and that one cannot spoil a child under the age of 3 years. 

I'm very pleased to read that you will be changing doctors!  I've never heard of giving a baby juice of any kind for gas.  What the other mothers have said is true, babies should only have breastmilk or formula, to get the essential nutrients they need to stay healthy and grow.  As an aside, you'll be pleased to learn that if you are breastfeeding already, breastmilk is the best thing for producing myelin, also known as white matter, the insulator on neural pathways.  Once a pathway in the brain is fully myelinated, one can never forget how to do something.  Also, when myelin and endorphins are combined, the myelin is laid thicker and faster on the pathways, so learning takes place faster and more efficiently. 

I know I've given you a long reply with lots of extra added, but I hope it helps with your decision.  I figure that the more informed we are, the better decisions we can make.  All the best shy.gif

post #25 of 52

Just another vote to say that a two month old is a TINY, tiny person who is not capable of working through things like tummy aches by themselves.  They might fall asleep from pure exhaustion, but that doesn't sound like a very pleasant time to me.  Is there any way to fit the crib into your bedroom, maybe?  I've always had my kids in our bedroom until they were about a year, and then they moved to their own rooms because they were such light sleepers that they slept better in the quiet of their own space.  But I think two months is very, very tiny to move into a separate room.  I'm not judging those who make that work for them, I'm sure some baby-parent dyads/triads need that configuration, but all things considered, I wouldn't be a fan of that arrangement at all.

post #26 of 52

Gas/vomitting/GI issues are a symptom of a larger problem.  PErhaps due to western medicine's tendency to see things in isolation, we no longer realize this.  ONly one post above discussed food eliminations during breastfeeding.   I'd have absolutely no idea what to suggest in a FF'ing infant in terms of eliminations. An intolerance of a food or foods in a bf'ing mother or an ingredient or ingredients in artificial milk is one cause of GI issues (as well as other things like eczema, cradle cap, other skin issues, behavioral issues, sleep issues, etc.); tongue tie is another. 

 

Only in western society is where baby sleeps even a question.  In most of the rest of the world, they do not have the luxury of multiple rooms for people to sleep separately.  

 

My situation was very similar when I was a new mom.  My instincts & my body were saying to keep my baby close but everything/everyone else was telling me that I shouldn't be (except the moms at LLL meetings - I credit them for keeping me sane during it all & had we not gone to an LLL conference when dd was 15 months old, I'd either be divorced or the mom of one - I'm still married & have three children).  Western society is hell bent on separating moms & babies.  The whole society is set up that way & when you do it differently, you or your child are called names ("mama's boy!).  Well, look at how sick, mentally & physically, we are.  Is separation really in the best interest of any of us?  I think not.

 

Navigating the world of new motherhood isn't easy.  While I would love to do it over to not make the same mistakes, I also wouldn't want to go through it all again.  If the OP hasn't been to an LLL meeting yet, it can be a place to find like-minded mamas in real life.  It can be very helpful to be among their company.

 

Best wishes,

Sus

post #27 of 52
You should definately cuddle with him as much as possible while he's little. Someday he'll grow up and find a new girl to cuddle with. :)
post #28 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by KSLaura View Post

You should definately cuddle with him as much as possible while he's little. Someday he'll grow up and find a new girl to cuddle with. :)

 

Or boy. 

post #29 of 52
We cosleep with our twins. But sometimes it's nice to have private time in bed. I think some Dads are nervous that cosleeping will put an end to intimacy. If we need that time together and the babes are already asleep, we lay them down in their crib with the baby monitor on. Then when they wake up I can hear them before they start to cry and bring them to bed with us. Just an idea. But baby's needs do come first. Snuggle that LO every chance you have. <3
post #30 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by Homeschool Mum View Post

Thanks to MRI scanning, we can now see the effects of different forms of parenting and how they impact on brain development. 

 

Wow, this sounds like a fascinating study - where can I see the link?

 

My father was lecturing me yesterday about the fact that I'm *still* (safely, I add) co-sleeping with my daughter (she's not even 2 months old yet). He said, "You not supposed to do that" ... I would love to show him some scientific studies about why I am raising his granddaughter like I am. A shame we need studies in our modern society that say it's okay for a mother to cuddle her tiny baby at night eyesroll.gif ... but glad these reports are coming out about  the benefits of instinctual parenting.

 

For the OP, maybe sharing with her husband that six-month roomsharing stat/recommendation about avoiding SIDS would be a good way to broach the subject. It is nice to have intuition and science aligned.

post #31 of 52
I can't answer about that particular study but there is also info out of Harvard and University Notre Dame.

http://www.news.harvard.edu/gazette/1998/04.09/ChildrenNeedTou.html

http://cosleeping.nd.edu/
post #32 of 52
There's a great book on the whole topic. The Science of Parenting by Margot Sunderland. It has all the links to the studies in the book.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Science-Parenting-Margot-Sunderland/dp/075663993X
post #33 of 52

Thanks for the responses! I will look into these studies.

post #34 of 52

we do too.

 

no harm at all.

 

just a happy baby.

post #35 of 52
Co-sleeping simply isn't safe and anyone who claims otherwise clearly hasn't researched it enough.

I di agree with keeping baby in the same room with you when you sleep, someone mentioned SIDS and having the baby in your room with you will help give you peace of mind. I suggest keeping the crib in your room.
post #36 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by FlintDoula View Post

Co-sleeping simply isn't safe and anyone who claims otherwise clearly hasn't researched it enough.

Um, welcome to MDC.

 

Co-sleeping isn't safe?  How do you explain the fact that most of the rest of the world does it?  What about it isn't safe? How do you explain the lives & well being of my three children if co-sleeping isn't safe?  Have you read, "Sleeping with Your Baby," by Dr. James McKenna?  Have you heard of Dr. James McKenna?  What research are you expecting people to find to prove co-sleeping isn't safe?  Do you have children?

 

Okay, that's all that's come to me in the first two minutes of pondering this post. winky.gif  I look forward to hearing more from you about this topic. 

 

Best wishes,

Sus

post #37 of 52
Don't get me wrong I'm very much a "crunchy" "hippie" kinda person but I just trust the AAP and the CPSC more than I do SLIGHTLY biased studies. I don't think its an epidemic or anything but its not far to call something safe when it is the reason for the dealth of infants.

To answer more personal questions I am doing relative care for my two little cousins (aged 4 & 5) and have been for the past two years and will most likely adopt them this year. No I don't not have my own kids yet but we are TTC.

Why do you ask?
post #38 of 52
Sorry smartphone won't let me edit far to fair.
post #39 of 52
Safe Co-sleeping Guidelines for anyone who may be considering co-sleeping. Since we live in a culture where co-sleeping, nor breastfeeding, is not the norm, many parents may not realize all of these safety factors.

http://cosleeping.nd.edu/safe-co-sleeping-guidelines/
post #40 of 52
Quote:
Originally Posted by FlintDoula View Post

Don't get me wrong I'm very much a "crunchy" "hippie" kinda person but I just trust the AAP and the CPSC more than I do SLIGHTLY biased studies. I don't think its an epidemic or anything but its not far to call something safe when it is the reason for the dealth of infants.

To answer more personal questions I am doing relative care for my two little cousins (aged 4 & 5) and have been for the past two years and will most likely adopt them this year. No I don't not have my own kids yet but we are TTC.

Why do you ask?

By that logic, no infants should be sleeping in cribs either since so many have died in them.  SIDS even used to be called crib-death. 

 

eta: The reason for the recommendation to keep the baby in the parents' room isn't parental "peace of mind", it's to lower the risk of SIDS. 


Edited by rachelsmama - 6/25/13 at 5:20am
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