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~Expecting a Rainbow - July 2013~ - Page 3

post #41 of 61

Doula questions

  • Both have reference, both check out extremely well. 
  • Yes, and have.
  • Both are about 40 live births and both have worked with the hospital I'll be at and have done home birth as well. 
  • Both have a back up, #1 uses #2 as her back up and #2 is open to using #1 as her back up. 
  • If they come down with the flu the back up will be used, I would meet the back up at the 2nd pre-natal visit. 

 

Patti - Congratulations on 10 weeks, we must be fairly close together I'm 10 weeks and 5 days. Good luck with all of the kids and the sickness. I'm definitely planning on doing what genetic testing we can. I don't know a lot about it. What is the Harmony test? At our next ultrasound I know they'll do the Nuchal Translucency. 

post #42 of 61
Thread Starter 

I think I would go with doula #1 and then you still get #2 as back up, it sounds win-win.

 

Here are some links about the Harmony test: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/alexandra-minna-stern/noninvasive-prenatal-test_b_2280696.html

http://www.ariosadx.com/

 

It's a blood test. They can diagnostically test for genetic disorders by just drawing the mother's blood. No amnio or CVS test required anymore thus eliminating accidental miscarriage due to the invasive testing. I am 36 and two of my five children have special needs, my DH's father was adopted and they don't know a lot about that side of things medically and I prefer homebirth but would birth at a hospital if there was going to be a problem with the baby that would need immediate medical. So for me, I need to know what to plan for. I am due on the 20th so you must be due on the 15th?
 

post #43 of 61
Beagle- Sounds like doula #1is the way to go. I love the idea of taking classes from my doula! You could really get to know her.

Patti- I am so glad you found a counselor who really gets your situation. DH and I went to a few sessions to work on some blended family issues, and the lady did not get it at all! I suspect she was a bitter, divorced mom herself. Everything was my issue to her, and I needed to just accept that I had no say in my life anymore. We stopped seeing her pretty fast, and worked it out ourselves. Anyway, my point is, it is really important to find someone who GETS it without having to try to explain. I love that we have the same due date!!

My DSS‘s mom is in the picture, and what a messy picture it is. She has the kids on the opposite coast most of the year, and does NOT support them having a relationship with DH. We have not so much as spoken to my SD(11) since March of 2012. We had to go to court 5 times for emergency hearings just to get my SS for the already court ordered summer time. SD was supposed to come too, but that didn't happen. We didn't speak to SS for a whole year prior to spring break, which was more emergency court. We have another court date coming up, and are trying to get a change in custody due to emotional abuse. Just to give you a really clear picture, SS's mother and sister sent him a card instructing him to kill DH. Soooo, when she finds out about baby, it will not be pretty. SS has been doing great though. He really loves his dad, and has been having an awesome time. We will tell SS before he goes back, but leave it up to him if he wants to share the news with anyone else. We will tell his mom eventually, but I would like to put it off as long as possible.
post #44 of 61

Doula question

 

I think I'd likely go with #1 if it weren't for the distance. Patti I know you're from the South (US I presume), Mattie I'm not sure where you're from. I'm in Toronto Canada.... no not the northern reaches of Canada, but snow if February and winter storms are really common. We're due Feb 16, which is actually our wedding anniversary, and we had to end our reception earlier than expected last year because of a blizzard. Chances of lightening striking twice, not sure? But driving times can definitely double in the winter if not leave the highways pretty much closed. What are your thoughts on choosing a Doula at a distance during the winter with these conditions?

 

Patti - Thanks for the information on the tests, I'm 35 so I'm definitely thinking tests are in order. We also don't have much medical history on DH's family. 

 

Mattie - So sorry you're going through so much drama with your partner's ex. 

post #45 of 61
Beagle I think doula number one too. To me I'd really want a doula who offered specifically technical expertise and knowledge that I don't have (ie hypnobirthing). Although the distance would make me nervous... But then like you said you'd get number two as a back up who also sounds great so win-win.

Doppler still not here yet gahh! I'm hoping it arrives Sunday...

Patti you and I are just 2 days apart I'm due Feb 22!
post #46 of 61
Thread Starter 

Beagle, I am from the south but I have spent a lot of time doing field work in Montana and Wyoming. I got hit by the "worst blizzard they had in 45 years" while in Wyoming in June 2008. June and the passes on the mountains were closed due to snow!  I was camping, in a tent, it was awful! Fcensored.gifing Freezing doesn't even begin to describe it. I was stuck for three days at that damn elevation because of the snow. If the storm was bad enough could doula #1 call doula #2 as back-up? So you don't get left out in the cold winky.gif (sorry, corny joke) At what point during labor is the doula expected to come? Will she come to your house before heading to the hospital or meet you at the hospital? It sucks that there is no way to guess at how long labor will take. I'm bad about not calling my midwife until the very last minute. She hasn't missed one of my births yet but it's been close.

 

mattie, We have the same due date joy.gif About therapists, it really does make a difference to have a good fit. DH and I went to one who was great with helping us through some issues but I made sure to really have a good long phone conversation with him first. I also choose a male for that type of therapy because they tend to bring less of their own baggage to the table than women at least that is my experience with couples therapy. We have a blended family too. The oldest 4 children are mine from previous relationships and DH and I have 1 bio together and are expecting a 2nd bio together. He has no other children. To make it even more complicated there are three different fathers for my 4 children. One lives in Hawaii, another in California and one in Malta (off the coast of Italy). DH has really taken my 4 on as his children. He is a SAHD and part-time paramedic. My exes vary in degrees of crappy. It's great that your DH is willing to take it to court. It shows that he really cares about his kids. I have tried and tried to get my children's fathers involved to no avail. This has included trying to get them to come to  therapy sessions with the kids in an attempt to heal the relationship. I have had the therapist tell me that two of the baby daddies are just lost causes and it's just better for the kids not to have the relationship. In response to the therapist telling my ex that he needed to be more considerate of his 6 year old daughter's feelings he just said "I'm not going to do that. I don't care how she feels." Therapist said that he should no longer have contact with DD after that session. I hope you guys saved that card with the instructions to kill DH that is serious stuff. Keep me updated on how it goes. I have been through a lot of custody court!
 

post #47 of 61
Thread Starter 

Just asked DH about the doppler we have at home. He said that it probably won't pick up the baby because he doesn't have the OB attachment. He only has the vascular one which is a different frequency. Vascular has shallower wave penetration and thus won't pick up a fetal heart tone which is much deeper within the body. duh.gif

 

Oasis, We are only two days apart energy.gif It sure would be nice if we all lived closer and could do a monthly preggers lunch out together!
 

post #48 of 61
Thread Starter 

I have my next doc appointment on Friday. I'll be 11 weeks, 1 day. I feel like if everything looks good then I will be able to relax a bit. I did look at some newborn cloth diaper covers online yesterday . . . tentatively moving out of pregnancy denial.
 

post #49 of 61
Oasis- I hate waiting!

Patti- I'm so glad you are able to start to come out of denial! I hope your appointment goes really well! I am counting down the days to mine (9). I'm sorry your kids dads are crappy. Kids deserve both parents, and it is sad when they can't have that, whatever the reason.

AFM- I am trying not to freak out about every weird twinge. My district manager came to my store on Friday, and last time the MC started on a Friday when he came in. I totally know it is irrational, but that doesn't stop the freak-out. I saw him, so I keep expecting the TP to come away pink. Still, every day that goes by is another day with no actual evidence that anything is wrong. I am reading Birth Matters and really enjoying it.
post #50 of 61
Good for you Patti! I, on the other hand, have been out of control browsing for strollers and carriers and crib bedding smile.gif

Matti -- it's amazing how every day that passes without incident feels like a small victory, isn't it?!

So fetal Doppler arrived today. I was super excited to use it but (no big surprise) couldn't find the hb. I'm 10w1d so I know it can take awhile but would def appreciate tips if anyone has them! I'm using Angel Sounds which is 3 mhz. For a panicked 10 minutes I thought I had found it and it was super slow -- around 62 bpm -- until I realized I was hearing my own heart beat. Duh! Might give it another go after dinner. For now still having symptoms so I'm not too worried about it.
post #51 of 61
I just heard a heartbeat on Thursday, at 10 weeks. Felt so relieved and finally started to relax. Yesterday, all relief washed away, replaced with panic. I was out to lunch with a friend and bled through my clothes. A trip to the ER and ultrasound revealed baby with a strong heartbeat, measuring a full week ahead. I was so happy to see our little babe moving like crazy. The ultrasound also showed that I have a subchorionic hemorrhage. This is the same complication that I had with my last pregnancy that ended in miscarriage. Fortunately, I am further along this time and the hemorrhage is measuring "small" as compared to measuring "large" like the one in my last pregnancy. The bleeding has already let up - no longer red and heavy, just some pink spotting now. I am feeling optimistic in many ways, as the outlook is better than my last experience with a hemorrhage, but it has definitely put me on edge, just so very nervous. Just when I thought I was at a point that I could relax and really enjoy this pregnancy. Thinking positive thoughts and hoping this hemorrhage clears up quickly.
post #52 of 61
Quote:
Originally Posted by oasis84 View Post

Good for you Patti! I, on the other hand, have been out of control browsing for strollers and carriers and crib bedding smile.gif

Matti -- it's amazing how every day that passes without incident feels like a small victory, isn't it?!

So fetal Doppler arrived today. I was super excited to use it but (no big surprise) couldn't find the hb. I'm 10w1d so I know it can take awhile but would def appreciate tips if anyone has them! I'm using Angel Sounds which is 3 mhz. For a panicked 10 minutes I thought I had found it and it was super slow -- around 62 bpm -- until I realized I was hearing my own heart beat. Duh! Might give it another go after dinner. For now still having symptoms so I'm not too worried about it.

 

Oasis - Sorry you couldn't find the heart beat. It is still very early. I'm using a medical grade doppler which may be the difference. If you have an anterior placenta it may not be possible to find this early.

 

Here is a link to a blog I found very helpful when learning how to use the doppler, it links to several YouTube videos that were great, several of them use the AngleSounds doppler: http://lovebeingpregnant.blogspot.ca/2012/06/how-to-use-fetal-doppler-at-home.html

 

For my own tips here is what I've figured out:

  • It's very low in my abdomen, like just above the hair line. 
  • It's good to angle it towards my pubic bone as the uterus is still tucked under the pubic bone.
  • Tiny tiny movements, like millimeters matter. Go VERY VERY VERY slowly use a circular pressure pattern. 
  • Have DH try, when I was getting really frustrated I just handed it over to DH who has a much better view of what skin he has covered and what he has not. 
  • Find your arteries, I think the arteries might border the uterus (I could be totally wrong on that), but everytime I've found the arteries the heart beat has been somewhere inside those lines, it's given me 'outer limits'
  • Baby moves.... so baby is not in the same place every day. Lately I baby has been sitting inline with my belly button which has made things easier. 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by mama sarah View Post

I just heard a heartbeat on Thursday, at 10 weeks. Felt so relieved and finally started to relax. Yesterday, all relief washed away, replaced with panic. I was out to lunch with a friend and bled through my clothes. A trip to the ER and ultrasound revealed baby with a strong heartbeat, measuring a full week ahead. I was so happy to see our little babe moving like crazy. The ultrasound also showed that I have a subchorionic hemorrhage. This is the same complication that I had with my last pregnancy that ended in miscarriage. Fortunately, I am further along this time and the hemorrhage is measuring "small" as compared to measuring "large" like the one in my last pregnancy. The bleeding has already let up - no longer red and heavy, just some pink spotting now. I am feeling optimistic in many ways, as the outlook is better than my last experience with a hemorrhage, but it has definitely put me on edge, just so very nervous. Just when I thought I was at a point that I could relax and really enjoy this pregnancy. Thinking positive thoughts and hoping this hemorrhage clears up quickly.

 

Sarah - That's so scary. I'm glad the ER was able to give you some good news. Best of luck. 

 

AFM - I ended up deciding on Doula #2, I was just too scared of snow in mid-February and they are both amazing people. I'm still counting down to my 12 wk u/s 7 Days, 23 Hours, 59 Minutes. We've got some baby stuff done, mostly because we got a lot of baby stuff done in our last pregnancy and didn't throw it out. My accomplishment for the week was fixing the stroller we got from Freecycle so that it now has 4 working wheels. Very mechanical for me. Quite proud of myself. I guess this means if I'm willing to do that I'm starting to believe this little one might live. To date we haven't bought anything for the baby, but we've picked up a bunch from Freecycle, I want to do as much on recycled and hand-me-down as possible. They only use it for such a short time, seems like a waste. But that's me. I also have a lot of mama friends who I know will have some hand me downs so we can depend on that a bit. 

post #53 of 61
Thread Starter 

mattie, I know what you mean about the crazy triggers re: your district manager. My last miscarriage started after I cleaned the bathroom. So when I cleaned the bathroom yesterday I kept getting really nervous. I haven't heard of Birth Matters, I think I will check that out.

 

oasis, A few more weeks and you should be picking up that heartbeat with no problem heartbeat.gif
 

Beagle, Doula #2 it is then thumb.gif I'm glad you were able to come to a decision that provides you with the most peace of mind. I think I should check out Freecycle just for the hell of it, since I already have everything I need for a baby! My youngest is 2 and I still have all her stuff. If it's a boy my sister saved everything from her son who will be 2 in October.

 

mama sarah, How absolutely terrifying! I'm so glad to hear that baby is happy as can be and that the subchorionic hemorrhage is small. Does your doc expect it to cause further complications? I thought that I read somewhere that it can heal itself???

 

AFM - The morning sickness while still pretty constantly present isn't as intense as it was. I cannot wait for it to be completely gone but at least I am getting some relief from the intensity. If all goes well at my next doc appointment (Friday) I will be telling my boss that I am expecting next week. I am having a crazy aversion to drinking water. It makes my stomach hurt yet I am very thirsty. If I flavor it with lemon or honey I can get it down, strange.

post #54 of 61
Sarah so sorry to hear that -- I'm sure it must have been scary but good to know things are still looking up for you. Hopefully the rest of the pregnancy is totally uneventful for you.

Beagle -- thanks so much for the tips! I tried again this afternoon and voila I heard it! It was just like I've heard it described -- like a race horse -- so fast there was no mistaking it for my own. I found it on my right side -- I was surprised it wasn't in the center. Don't know why I thought it would be. Anyway I got up to grab my phone to count the bpm but couldn't get it back once I laid down again. Tried finding it later when DH got home from work and nada. But I was just so happy to have heard anything at all. It was all the reassurance I needed that the little bean is still in there. Well worth the $30 smile.gif

Going for doula 2 is definitely the right choice if it puts your mind at ease. When it gets down to it I think the calm and peace of mind you have knowing your doula is just minutes away will go a long way toward giving you the birth experience you want.

Patti so happpy to hear MS is abating somewhat for you. I've been pretty lucky with it honestly but it's still just annoying enough that I can't imagine dealing with worse and still holding down a full time job where btw your boss doesn't know you're prego! We're getting close -- counting down the days to that magical second trimester...
post #55 of 61
patti - though there are no guarantees, the outlook for continuing with a viable pregnancy is good. Since the hemorrhage is small, we are hoping it heals quickly - yes, you are right in thinking that the hemorrhage can heal itself or be reabsorbed - that's what we're hoping for!!! When I had this same complication with my last pregnancy, it did end in miscarriage, but my hemorrhage was large and the bleeding never let up after it started. With this one, after the bleeding on Saturday, I have had no more bleeding or spotting, which is extremely comforting to me. I am on bedrest for a few days, in hope that it will give my body a chance to focus on healing. The benefits of bedrest with a hemorrhage are inconclusive, but it seems to be the right thing for me at this time. I have a midwife appt. on Thursday and we'll go from there! In the meantime, my husband has put me on some herbal tinctures to support my uterus and discourage cramping. (He's a 4th year naturopathic doctor student - and has been oh-so-supportive and helpful!). I am so happy to hear that your MS is letting up!

beagle thanks for the kind thoughts and congrats and coming to a decision on your doula. It must feel so good to have that figured out!

oasis - thank you as we'll for the kind words! Woohooo for finding and hearing the heartbeat - that's so exciting!!!
post #56 of 61

mama sarah - So glad you got good news out of a scary situation!

 

oasis - Hooray for a heartbeat!

 

Beagle - Glad you chose a doula and that you're getting some peace of mind about your pregnancy.

 

Patti - I hear you on the water. I have trouble choking it down without some sort of flavoring unless it is icy cold. And our ice maker is out of commission, so fridge temp is the only option for high volume consumption. How are you otherwise?

 

Mattie - our next appointments are on the same day. I'll try not to make myself crazy between now and then if you will too smile.gif

 

Nothing but good news and smooth sailing from here, okay babies??

post #57 of 61
Thread Starter 

Hi Chelsea! How are you?

 

I am frustrated because my doc's office just called to cancel my appointment for tomorrow because the ultrasound machine is broken greensad.gif I have been having so much anxiety that I was really looking forward to the appointment. I was hoping for some good news to put my mind at ease. They aren't sure how long until the machine is fixed so they have to call me next week once it's up and working to work me in.

 ETA I guess I should make a thread for August. I was thinking about adding our names and due dates to the header.

post #58 of 61
patti: sorry to hear about your rescheduled appt. greensad.gif - I hope the machine is fixed soon.

I had a midwife appointment today. We heard the baby's heartbeat again! That sweet sound is so reassuring. I haven't had any bleeding or spotting since my scare and trip to the ER on Saturday. I have an ultrasound scheduled for next week to check up on the size/status of my hemorrhage. Feeling optimistic and hoping that we see that the hemorrhage is healing. I feel like I won't be able to truly relax until that is all healed up. I've been having quite a bit of nausea yet - blech! There is something reassuring in that as well though. Looking forward to reaching the end of this first trimester - it's coming up soon!!

Hope all of you are doing well!
post #59 of 61

Hi Patti! Sorry they rescheduled you! greensad.gif You can come with me to mine on Tuesday, I'm sure they won't mind.

 

mama sarah - Yay! Sounds like your body is cooperating with you and baby! Hope you're healed up in no time!

 

My belly is getting bigger but I'm still pretty symptom free otherwise. I keep poking my abdomen trying to feel anything that might be movement, but I don't think I'm there yet. Or I don't know what I'm supposed to be feeling. I seem to get more anxious as the appointment gets closer, but I still have a feeling that everything's going to be okay. Trying to just go with it instead of overthinking. And I should be able to stop the progesterone supplements after my next appointment because I'll be 14 weeks and shouldn't need it by then. Hooray. That stuff is not my favorite friend.

 

For the August thread - my due date (by my calculation anyway) is Feb 7. Great idea thumb.gif

post #60 of 61
patti so sorry about the appt -- how frustrating! Any chance they could refer you somewhere else while they wait to have the machine fixed?

mama Sarah glad you have some reassurance smile.gif fingers crossed the drama is over for you...

chelsea definitely having the same issue with the movement. Today I felt some weird twitchy fluttery things in my lower abdomen but like you I don't know what it feels like so who knows if it was anything or not. I'm only 11 weeks so my guess is I can't feel anything yet and it's just wishful thinking!

AFM pick up the hb on the Doppler about every other day so I'm feeling happy, confident and hopeful. Not to mention my belly is seriously popping and it's starting to become obvious. I'm floored I'm showing so early but it's also reassuring.
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