My 6 yo son (we have 3 other boys) is really fixated on the routine of dessert. I mean, who can blame him, right? But it's to the point that he gets very concerned/repeatedly inquires about/gets upset over it. For example, say he falls asleep on a late car ride home, or while watching a movie- as we transition him to bed, if he wakes up a little he will start asking for, then crying about not "getting dessert". If he he gets a lot of treats in a day- say a holiday or birthday party day- he still gets upset even if he had a giant cupcake before coming home. My thoughts are it is a pleasant routine for him, but growing up we didn't have "desert" every night, I didn't set that routine, and his siblings aren't very fixated on it. He threw a fit at the last birthday we went to because they had cupcakes earlier, but had a bbq later, and after the bbq he freaked out in front of everyone because there was "no dessert left" I talk to him logically about it, but he gets very distraught. I try to give him healthier "dessert" options but I still sort of wish he could get used to not having to have that all the time! On the other hand, Routine is ok and maybe you mamas think it's harmless as long as it isn't overboard? Anything I could try, or should I just let him hold onto this routine?
On to part 2- My DSS is 6.5, and we've been on a roll with the kids eating well in general these days- they finally got over their late pre-k years of uber picky eating. :) So the past few weeks DSS has been a little weird about food. Randomly one day, as I was cooking homemade veg pizza and making salad (I do almost all the cooking in out household) He says to us: "I think the reason why I don't feel good all the time is that you don't feed me healthy enough foods" (WHAT). First of all, where did that come from, and second- If I were cooking any healthier he'd probably cry lol. He will take a few bites of food then say he's "full", the few times we let him be done he was complaining of hunger within the hour but wanted a snack. We are on the fresh-fruit-only snack policy now with that, but he eats fruit and still complains. it's only happening at dinnert when his dad is there, and when his dad tells him he needs to try a little more (this is after being at the table for onlt 2 minutes!) he gets sad, and puts his head down on the table, and often pouts/cries for the rest of dinner. I have to admit, it's getting a little under my skin. It's distracting to the family meal time and it's fairly extreme- It's food he loves, and he's super hungry ALL THE TIME. Recently he's done it at my In-law's at a big family meal and another get together. I've noticed these common threads: it's always dinner (the meal his dad is at), it always only takes him a moment, it's not halfway through the meal or anything, he KNOWS what his snack options are put always wants a different option later, and then often gets upset when he can't have dessert. I just wonder if it's a normal developmental stage where he's trying to have control, and he see's his dad as the one he wants to have this boundary pushing with, and maybe I should approach it like that? Find better options of control over dinner for him (like meal planning etc)... I don't just want to lose my nerve in the heat of the moment because he's saying rude things about his food or pouting/crying on the table for the tenth time in a row. Help! Lol