I'll go with Barney. I'm able to drown him out pretty well, but yikes, those 2 are not very appealing options.
4 hours of sleep a night or 8 hours broken into 2 hour chunks, for the first year?
Hmmm, I'd love a happy toddler, but I don't know if I could handle hot and humid right now. I think I would go with that option though.
Swaddle baby or loosely cover?
Loosely cover most of the time. We only swaddled DS when nothing else worked.
Chocolate sheet cake or pound cake (I am making both right now for a friend's birthday tomorrow!)?
Milk or milk alternative (hemp, soy, almond).
Milk alternative (we do coconut, almond, or hemp - I'm allergic to dairy and soy).
Tablet or laptop?
Tablet, although we have both in the house.
Techno-phobe or technology geek?
Techno-phobe... I don't even have a smart phone.
Big deal holidays or easy, with few gifts and decorations?
Definitely more hippy than mainstream... I dunno about hardcore anything though (at least not right now).
Would you rather wake up at 5am every morning to milk goats/cows or start an 1 1/2 hour commute to work?
Definitely milk goats/cows at 5am over a long commute...yuck.
Would you rather use prefolds/covers or pockets/aios?
Would you rather do diaper laundry or toddler laundry?
Minivan. Cause that's what I had. Now that I will have 4 kids and CAN'T fit in a car, I'm feeling "stuck". :)
Purchase or make birthday cakes?
Make for sure (I love making cakes, though nothing super fancy I just have fun!)
Chicken salad, tuna salad, or egg salad sandwich?