My LO is past 2 yrs old and I'm finally admitting "out loud" (except under a different username, please forgive me) that I don't love him the way I'm supposed to. Here is why I say so. I read blog posts or birth stories where new moms say stuff like:
(from a blog post here)
These sentiments are so wonderful and so beautiful and what I expected to happen. But it didn't. In more than 2 years it hasn't happened. Do I love my child? Yes, of course. But I've never FELT IT. Not deep down, life altering. I feel ... like my life is just chores and responsibilities. I'd rather be at work. I don't look forward to seeing my family at the end of the day. Being at home is a 2nd job, and not the one I like. And it's not because my child is in a "terrible toddler" stage. I've always felt this way. I kept waiting for it to change, for us to "bond", but it's not happening.
So I ask. Is this PPD or is there something else wrong with me? What mama doesn't want to be with her baby?