I am worried about it. I am an experienced mom and he is my fourth of 5 boys (and one on the way too!) These behaviors are not new, but I am just done with them. I have no patience anymore. DH and I are starting to become those really strict parents who yell and spank and time out all day just because NOTHING is working. But even that is not working. Well it curbs it in the moment but the next day or a few hours later we are back at square one. I sometimes just collapse on my bed and cry and think maybe the structure of daycare would be better for him and I should just go to work.
So here are the key behaviors we deal with every. single. day.
Refuses to get dressed or undressed
Refuses to brush teeth
Refuses to wash hands before meals
Refuses to take a bath
Pounces on baby brother/plays too rough
Snatches baby brothers toys just to get a reaction
Throws a tantrum or whines and argues when he doesn't get his way
Tells me flat out, "I am NOT doing __________ ." when I ask him to do something.
Literally digs his heels in, blocks a door way, or lays on the floor so I can't physically move him.
Literally "buzzes" with energy that seems out of control at times
What he doesn't do/or is able to do that is good
He doesn't hit me or DH or his siblings
He does seem know what he did wrong when we ask him after time out/calm down
He can communicate how he feels very well (I am frustrated because________, etc)
He is affectionate and seems truly remorseful when he sees that his behavior is upsetting to us.
Is sometimes calm, can sit for stories, to do a puzzle, color, etc.
Has a great imagination, sings, plays happily
Has appropriate behavior when on play dates (according to the moms he's a joy!)
I feel like no matter what I do these behaviors just won't abate. I can pick my battles and I do but some of these are non-negotiable. I accept he is very high energy and very strong willed and I try to give him what he needs - lots of outside time, calm down time, predictability, etc. In the past we've done sticker charts. I admit I am not a huge fan of the whole punishment/bribe thing - much more a natural consequence gal here - but I am open to anything at this point. I have found myself letting him watch more and more TV because that is the only time I get any peace! I feel so angry with him some days that its hard to be affectionate when he comes to me for loves and hugs which makes me feel terribly guilty. I am just emotionally exhausted and have nothing left to give.