I've been on a quest for the last year or so to find books with good steamy sex scenes that don't offend my feminist principles. It doesn't have to be about feminism or a polemic or anything, just stuff that isn't, you know, creepy. No rapeyness, no stupidly macho heroes, etc. And also not the pseudo-feminist stuff with supposedly "strong" women characters who then give up whatever their strength is just to be in love. Also not man-hating...I've had some stuff recommended to me that turned into man-hating and my feminism doesn't include that.
I prefer fantasy as a genre but will also read good human-based science fiction. No BDSM (faux or otherwise) please. I find that stuff triggery.
I've actually written and published two novels myself just to satisfy what I'm looking for, but I'd like to kick back and read others!