Hey all! I'm still lurking out here on occasion and I just wanted to toss some info to those of you having difficulty in your relationships and not understanding each other, and even for those of you who are just peachy it may give you deeper insight to keep your relationship strong & healthy. There's a system that explains the difference between an "emotional" and a "physical" one is typically more focused on money/work and the other is more focused on relationship and it doesn't always follow the traditional man/woman roles. This site has a little quiz that will tell you which one you are http://www.hypnosis.edu/ep/ and also has the link for the book. And it has a long video about it too!
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The Saner TTC-Thunder Moon - Page 14post #261 of 6779/22/13 at 10:26amThread Starterpost #262 of 6779/22/13 at 5:53pmCool!!! Thanks Prescottchels!!
DH is totally the physical. He has so many strengths (physically) but lacks the emotional depth to communicate on the level that I would like. I know I need to focus on his qualities and be grateful that he has all of those strong Alpha male qualities. He is a great leader....and a provider for our family. It is hard though when we are so emotional....especially with the hormonal ups and downs of ttc. That is why I value all of you ladies on this board! Someone who understands and can empathize.
:-)post #263 of 6779/22/13 at 6:17pmThread Starterpost #264 of 6779/22/13 at 6:21pmOur weekend fun- Shrimp and Grits festival on Jekyll Island. (For those that aren't familiar with grits, they are a southern staple when we eat any type of seafood! Fish, shrimp especially. Creamy and rich and soooo good!)
Here is my 11 year old step-son getting a big fat smooch from my 2 year old :-)
Hope all of you ladies had a great weekend! Take care :-)post #265 of 6779/22/13 at 6:24pmpost #266 of 6779/23/13 at 2:54pmpost #267 of 6779/24/13 at 8:28amHello,
Thanks for your advice ladies. Wengrin, you are spot on with daddy's princess and balancing soul integrity with supporting my husband. Mamblue, thanks for your questions. I'm pretty sure she's not got an eating disorder as she was with us for two weeks holiday before all this started. She seemed to be clean if drugs, I know she drinks with her mates. I think the root cause is more mundane- she's being lazy and wants the most pleasure with no hard work.
Wengrin- this photos are soooo cute. It looks like your little DS gets on well with his step brother :-) that's so cute.
Sorry to hear about the relationship stresses (chuord and wengrin). We had a few pressure issues when we first started TTC and in the end I said right, it's up to you! Here's the rough target days, over to you buddy! He felt less manipulated when I was clear the range I days. I still get frustrated that he is tired on the killer day quite often. It's annoying because not only do you know it's the best day for conceiving, Mother Nature also pumps up your libido!! Men are difficult. They are definitely a different race!! My DH is quite sensitive and in touch emotionally, he will still go away to think about it all on his rock though!! I have to keep giving him a prod.
Has anyone else ever had spotting at O time? I don't think it's anything to worry. I've had a tiny bit once before but more this time.
Finally- wengrin- I smiled at your comment about non BD sex!! Glad you enjoyed your recreational BD!! It really is a great connection when we all put aside this rollercoaster and enjoy our marriage. Good for you! :-)post #268 of 6779/24/13 at 2:06pmOxford - yay on the step daughter not having a 'major' issue. It's just a shame she doesn't understand a but more work now means less gross jobs in the future lol... Maybe if they taught you that I career Ed... If you study you can be a lawyer, etc if you don't you can clean the toilets... - it sure would have worked on me!
Re o spotting, I had some this month (maybe) I didn't chart o (just afterwards) but it happened the typical day before o and I thought it was just my cervix getting a little fragile from bd... But maybe... Mine was a couple of wipes with just a hint... How much are you talking?
Mama blue - how long to your hysteriscopy?
Hoping - is dh home? How are you coping?
Wengrin - how's finding the love going?
Afm - my temps have shot up this month around .1 c every day since o (ish) I looked back over my old charts and none of them had this amount of climb over so short a time... Hmmm maybe it's the vitex... Fascinating getting this intimate with your body.
I have one of my best friends here with her two boys (5&7) yesterday I got a surprise bonus migraine lol - I'm not used to that level of energy around me! Thank goodness babies start smallpost #269 of 6779/24/13 at 7:25pmOxford-
Spotting (for me) at O time always meant a really strong ovulation. Meaning the hormones pumped and a good egg was produced. I hope that is a good sign for you!
Sorry for the migraine...I know how bad that stinks. But migraines tend to come on for me when I am pregnant! Hope this is a good sign for you too!
I noticed we had the full moon (Blue moon) on Friday the 20th. I wonder if that's why I woke up Sat incredibly frisky....and I can't tell that I have ovulated yet but I have had the ecwm yesterday and today.
I was reading that whatever phase the moon was at the time of your own birth, will affect your fertility as it relates to the moon phase now.....I looked back and realized I was born on a full moon day. Thought that was pretty interesting!
Thanks ladies- yes the weekend was good. The kids got along great and we got a chance to reconnect. Sometimes breaking the routine a bit helps....it really helped us. DH has been more attentive the last few days.
And yes Chuord- I completely agree about men retreating during stressful times to their provider/protector mode....there really are huge differences in our make up. We are wired so differently.
Well we BD again today....I should be Oing any day here. We shall see.....
I had a baby shower for a mom that is in our playgroup. All of our kids are about the same age, and four of the moms are expecting. The friend today, she is from Brazil and she was telling us about their cultural traditions. Her mom is coming for 3 months! To cook, clean, laundry, iron, look after baby, help mom recover....it sounds so nice. My mom was a lot of help when DD was born in 2005, but she doesn't get around as well now. It was exciting to celebrate the new baby (due in 2 weeks). Her DD will be 2 next month, and now they are expecting a boy. So sweet.
I hope everyone is well...will be interesting how this Blue moon affects each of us.
Take care!post #270 of 6779/25/13 at 6:29am
I've been lurking quietly for a while. It's been a rollercoaster for me with the whole TTC thing. Started TTC last November, had a BFP in February, miscarried in May. Then I felt overwhelmed and decided not to try again for a while, so I had an IUD placed. I experienced a lot of cramping and uneasiness, and I pulled it out (myself; I'm a bit of a medical DYI type; it's a nurse thing). Anyway, DH has never stopped wanting to try again now, and it looks like I'm going to have the option of working from home at least part of the time if I want, so I think we're trying now. Now is probably better timing than last year, as DD is almost two, and will be more independent when we have another. I'm still a little uneasy about having another little one (this will be my fourth, although my first two are quite a bit older), but, when it comes down to it, this really is what we want the most.
So, we're trying.
I'm five-ish DPO; I am not 100% sure about our timing as I didn't get in that double-sure BD I usually try to on my estimated O day (but we did have a BD a day or two before). There is a chance, though, so I'm waiting. I'm really, really trying to be much saner about the process this time, and just keep a half-eye on it. I'm young enough (and, to be honest, nervous enough) that it doesn't need to happen right this minute. I'm trying to just leave it to its own timing, and focus on life outside my uterus.
As far as life goes, DH and I just got new bikes, and I've been having a blast exploring the trails around our house. It's great exercise, which I've really needed. We're also introducing a gluten-free diet for our son, who has some digestive issues, to see if it helps. That's been an adjustment (we like pasta).
What has everyone else been up to?post #271 of 6779/25/13 at 8:38am
Just checking back in. I'm afraid my internet time is limited these days except for when I'm nursing my dd to sleep at night, and then I'm on a tablet so typing isn't efficient. It's good to know I'm not alone in my nervous anticipation about the wait though, so I do like checking in.
I'm a SAHM, and I've got two kids already. This one is most likely the last one. I haven't had any difficulty conceiving in the past, so I'm hoping for smooth sailing. I'm still nursing this time though, but I hope not often enough to cause issues. I was due to start today, and I tested twice over the weekend, but they were both negative. The dollar store down the street is out of tests, so I think I'll just wait it out until 18 dpo, unless AF shows up. I'm trying to get over my issues with trying to control everything by knowing as much as possible as early as possible. In the end, knowing a couple of days sooner, or even taking a test, isn't going to make a difference. I just have to keep telling myself that.post #272 of 6779/25/13 at 5:14pmWengrin - lol re the moon timing, I get images of you chasing dh around like a sex fiend
Interesting that bit about it being connected to our birth moon!
Re migraines - my neuro alway told me they tend to go away if pg... So I get extra annoyed when I get one after I lol.
Primal joy - I totally get you... November was my start too - although I've only had a few chem losses rather than the full mc... Here's hoping that this time you get there in a few months!post #273 of 6779/25/13 at 5:16pmpost #274 of 6779/25/13 at 10:21pmDandy - So exciting that your testing day is so close. We are overdue for a BFP in this thread. Maybe you'll break our recent dry spell.
Is anyone else close to testing day? I'm rooting for all of you.
AFM, I'm on CD6. I have a hysteroscopy scheduled on Monday. I'm feeling optimistic and a wee bit nervous. Other than that, I'm just waiting waiting waiting here in procreative limbo. lol.post #275 of 6779/26/13 at 2:12ampost #276 of 6779/26/13 at 5:20amPrimalJoy- fx'd that this happens smoothly and easily for you! Sounds like you and hubby are enjoying bonding time together with your bikes...that is so important. Good for you! Ouch on the IUD removal...wow. Yes I have heard some friends have bad issues with their IUD. Even the copper ones that are supposed to not affect your hormones...cause issues. I don't plan to go that route after I (hopefully) have one more baby. I think we will chart and try the Fertility Awareness Method. Then I laugh thinking of accidentally getting pregnant at 45 something... with twins. I heard the 40-50 range is the 2nd group of unplanned pregnancies, aside from teens-early twenties. And also that multiples are common in 40's aged moms (can't remember the scientific reasoning...something about FSH).
Chuord- Ha....yes it was quite hilarious with the full moon. I don't know if it was that, or if breastfeeding was suppressing my libido in addition to hindering my fertility. Since we weaned a couple weeks ago maybe my sex drive is going back to normal? I don't know....but DH is thrilled either way. (Haha)
I am on CD 12 which is usually my O day but I have been having symptoms since the weekend so I thought it was happening early. However I haven't seen a temp rise....so I guess it either hasn't happened yet or my progesterone might be lacking....I will wait until Sat or Sun before beginning the progesterone supplements. In the meantime we are BD every night. :-)
Also Chuord- not completely true about the migraines and pregnancy. Yes definitely for some women that is true. But for me and several people I know, the surge in hormones sets off massive migraines. My first pregnancy when I was 29...I spent days in bed with migraines that would last for 3 days! It was awful. (Not to scare you...of course it was worth it and I would do it again in a heartbeat to have another blessing) but it was debilitating. I had to quit working in my 7th month. It was really rough. With my second pregnancy, I didn't have them as often but definitely still got them. There are of course so many things that trigger migraines...hormones do it for me but also blood sugar levels. And when you're pregnant your body sometimes doesn't regulate sugar as well as it normally does. So you have insulin spikes and lows....and that brings on migraines for me big time. I too had that discussion with my OB/GYN and Neuro while I was pregnant. They said some women who have chronic migraines notice that they ease up during pregnancy...but for some they don't and can even get worse. When I had my chemical pregnancy recently I noticed migraines and nausea as one of the first signs. That one didn't stick....but unfortunately migraines do occur during pregnancy and sometimes even more frequently when pregnant. The first trimester especially....ugh my head pounds and my stomach churns just thinking of it!! I hope you are one of the lucky ones that don't get them during pregnancy though!!!! :-)
Hi Dandy! I too am a SAHM and also ttc #3 but have been struggling to get pregnant for about 6 months (I am almost 39 so it is more of a worry....even though it's only 6 months). I was also nursing so I wonder if that was causing my hormones to not allow the bean to stick. I had a chemical pregnancy in August. So I weaned my DS...he turned two in August (he was ready anyway). He only nursed as a habit, for comfort....before nap and nighttime. The nursing would only last 3-5 min and he was out cold asleep! So I know he wasn't nursing enough for it to be a big deal.
He actually weaned beautifully. I was just sure my little boob-a-holic was going to put up a major fuss. But he was a big boy and I got him a transition toy as an incentive. He has been great. He still wants to snuggle before he sleeps...and is in bed with us, but he snuggles right up to my chest and he will either pat my breast with his hand or kiss my chest...and occasionally ask to nurse but when I remind him that the nursies went bye-bye he quickly forgets about it. The kisses and snuggles are sooooooo sweet. It has been the best part of it. It's like he needs more affection because he misses the bond of nursing. So sweet- words can't explain how it melts my heart. :-)
Anyway...my hope after that long novel is that you are able to continue nursing and carry a healthy pregnancy! I have heard that younger women can easily do it. I think age was against me...progesterone naturally declines as we approach 40- so when you add nursing it was too much for me....
Oxford- I hope you are doing well and hopefully work doesn't take too much of a toll on you! I know it is grueling, but I bet one positive is that it really helps take your mind off the grueling 2ww and obsessing over fertility. I remember days where I was so busy at work that I didn't know where the day went....it would be 5:00 before I knew it. Hope your day flies by and you are able to get everything done and feel good about it. :-)
Take care everyone!post #277 of 6779/26/13 at 9:07amHello!
Big presentation today went well, I am delighted to have got through it and the pressure is off :-)
Hello primal! So lovely to hear from you. I was wondering how you were doing. Nice to have you around :-) great news on the bikes. I bought a bike at the start of summer and love it too. Unfortunately I like the downhills much better than the ups and I make DH plan a route without steep uphills!!
Wengrin- I love the way you describe DS, he sounds adorable! You are definitely raising a boob man there, I think we can all predict what type of girl he'll be going for in the future!! Lol.
I think we are cycle buddies this month, I am 1 dpo. It feels like quite a few of us are around O at the same time this month.
I totally know what you mean about the full moon. This month the moon was so big an bright, the energy really affects me every month. To magnify it, I had acupuncture on the same day as the full moon. That night and the day after I was wired! Totally buzzing, giggly and full if beans. DH was shaking his head. It also peaked my libido which was nice ;-)
Maybe I was a full moon baby too, I will have to look it up.
Dandy- lovely to hear about you. You mentioned the nursing DD, so I'm she's quite young? How about your other child? DS, DD? Three sound like a lovely number!
I'm TTC #1 and have been trying a year now :-( I'm 36 and more than a little impatient!!
Mamablue- you are sounding calm my dear. Beat of luck for your hysteroscopy. Is that the camera that they use under general anaesthetic? We are all rooting for you. I am sure it will go smoothly and give you all the answers to help you. Big hugs!
Chuord- where are you in the month? How are things with DH? Have you both found some calm? Sending you some zen vibes, this journey can be so testing on our relationships. Any interesting job roles at the the moment?
I'm feeling quite satisfied by this cycle. It was our first wedding anniversary at the weekend and it was great. We went out for dinner and lunch the day after and just celebrated our marriage. Lots of champagne and togetherness, magic! I'm a happy wife.
There was also quite a lot of BD and DH was enthusiastic about the whole thing!! It's useful just before O!! The specialist told us not to worry about timing or calculating and just enjoy sex whenever you want it (Mother Nature method!). DH has taken this to heart an is just enjoying recreational BD. I'm not complaining. I am temping (quietly!!!) so I know it was yesterday for O, so hopefully this laid back method will help ;-)
Any lurkers around? Please say hello!post #278 of 6779/26/13 at 2:25pmWe grin - thanks for the extra migraine info... Either way I think I'll cope (hopefully) my migraines - the full ones are typically three days anyway, and as long as I get a few functional days its all acceptable. Like you said benefits out way the suffering!
Mama blue - soo can't wait for your hysteroscopy to be over - I have a really good feeling about pg for you afterwards... I hope they find some but not a lot of bits to fix.
Oxford - glad you are enjoying! Lol dh and I are also very happy together, he's supportive and caring lol he just didn't get how stressed and important this was to me timing wise... He told me the other day before o he now thinks about a baby daily!
Afm - ok either 7 or 8 dpo here... I only started charting after expected o (had some spotting the day before, so may have O'd early) like Oxford we're meant to be relaxed about it lol - but I'm secretly temping too
I have that gut feeling that I have a chance despite not getting a proper 'deposit' the last three days I've had various symptoms - light headed and weak before meals, bloating, frequent toilets, odd twinges and pulling sensations etc oh and moodiness lol... But not every day... So I'm just moving along and trying to be hopeful while remaining zen lol... I have a 14 day cycle so still at least a week before testing... Anyone else have any symptoms to share?post #279 of 6779/26/13 at 7:48pmHa that made me giggle about the secret temping. I am doing the same thing. I have found that if I just don't let on to DH how badly I am obsessing over ttc, then he just thinks it is more fun. I simply put on a cute nightie, approach him for some recreational BD and he is "over the moon"...hahaha.
Yay Oxford glad you got that presentation behind you and feel good about it. Huge relief I'm sure. Sounds like you had a fabulous time celebrating your anniversary with hubby. So sweet...would be great if you conceived during that time!!
Yes I have certainly raised a boob-man. He is so sweet. Wish I could show you his charming little personality but describing it is fun, too.
Having him makes me want another boy. They love their mamas and are the sweetest things. And so much easier than girls. I love my DD to pieces but she is a little drama queen at 8......cannot imagine the teenage years with her! But I'm sure she'll come around eventually and we will have a close relationship. She already has the moods and hormones and wants to assert herself....I don't remember being so sassy at her age. I have done my best to be very firm and consistent with her, but she will sure test those boundaries! Over, and over... :-) We have kept her on a competitive cheer/tumbling/dance team and she loves it. It is a good thing to wear her out. She has ADHD, so the discipline and structure are great for her. Plus she is pure exhausted after training 5 hours a week!
MamaBlue I hope you are doing well and your procedure goes/went smoothly. Can't remember when you said you had it....you're in my thoughts and hoping you get some positive news.
Chuord- I hope the spotting around O time and the headache are good signs!!!! Fx'd for you. You'll be testing sooner than myself....so let us know!
Oxford we will be close cycle buddies- I just can't figure out whether I have O'd or not. My cervix has been high and somewhat open and soft, but not super-soft like I have noticed before where it is so soft it blends in and you cannot even find it. Plus my temps have not risen yet. Maybe tomorrow? Or maybe I need some progesterone...my cycle could be wonky because of weaning. We shall see.
I am honestly trying my best to do recreational BD, while keeping an eye on my symptoms and trying to determine O so I can go ahead and start taking the progesterone supplements. I do have an appt at the OB (he does fertility) at the end of October....so if nothing happens by then, I will hopefully get some guidance as to why and if there is anything inexpensive that I can do about it.
Hubby has a great job and makes good money but we pay a lot in child support, as he should....but we also bought a new house in February and seems like there is always some huge expense we have to cover. So while we do okay, it is still tight on one income. So I would not pursue IVF or IUI....unless IUI is reasonable. We will see. (Like I've mentioned, we are blessed to have the children we have....so if it is not in the cards for us, I am okay with that.....I think). Lol...
Wow....again Chuord I have a good feeling about your symptoms...I know we don't want to get our hopes up....but what you're describing sounds very much like a strong O followed by pregnancy symptoms. Good luck!!!!
I would love to see someone here get a BFP this month!
AFM- Hopefully tomorrow AM I will see that blessed temp spike signaling that I O'd. We were too worn out tonight to BD....but I think we gave it a good shot over past few days. I might get up early and seduce DH before work. :-) Imagine me chasin him around the bathroom while he is shaving and trying to pick out his clothes!! that would be funny.
I would love to have a June baby. DD would be out of school and she would be a big help with DS. Plus the relaxed schedule of summer would be easier with a newborn. I get chills thinking about it. I need to calm down and keep my zen focus. If it is meant to be, it will be.......post #280 of 6779/27/13 at 4:32amGood Morning! My temp had risen .5 degree Fahrenheit when I got up around 5 AM. So just for good measure I woke hubby up for one more go at it. He usually gets up at 5:45....so I was glad I got up before him so we could BD and I didn't have to chase him around the bathroom while he was getting ready. Once he is up and out of bed he is in work mode and is in a hurry to get out the door.
So I think this worked out well. I am oficially in the 2WW. We really tried this week, so I hope we did it.
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