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37 weeks and on an emotional roller coaster

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 

Wow, I am on an emotional roller coaster.  I did not really experience this with my first! My daughter is out of school for the month of August (of all months) and I am feeling like I wish I could be a better mama right now.  I will never have the opportunity to have a month with just her again and most days, I am too tired to even take her to do fun things or to be the mom I usually am. I feel like I am raising my voice and just not having as much patience. I am in between mourning the fact that we will never be a family of 3 again and being excited to meet our new girl.  It's just so different this time around! I am more emotional and tired. I love my first baby girl and I can't believe we will be a family of 4 soon!

 

And there is the unknowns of the birthing process.  As some of you may remember, I am going for a home birth VBAC.  I have a fabulous midwife now and I completely trust her but it is so hard to know what my body and I will do. I know we all experience the unknowns.  Just wondering how it will all turn out. 

 

Trying to find ways to enjoy these last weeks of my final pregnancy too.  Realizing that I will never feel these strong movements again and that I will never get to have this big ole belly makes me kinda sad too! Ahh!

 

If anyone has any tips on fun things to do with a 3 year old or ways to make her feel special, I am all ears.  Thanks for listening! I am trying to focus on the positives and I know people make it through this transition all the time but it is harder than I thought!

 

xo

post #2 of 13
Just want to tell you that I totally understand, and not to be too hard on yourself. All of your emotions are valid. It sounds like you are an incredible mama, and your girls will be lucky to spend their childhoods in your home.
post #3 of 13

Aww, hang in there!  Try not to expect TOO much out of yourself!  Remember, you are hugely pregnant, so it's ok if you're just too tired to do as much, even if it feels like you should be able to do more.  As for fun things to do, it does of course depend on your energy level.  There's always outings like zoos, museums (children's museums are great since you can often plop down in a spot while they play in a sector of the museum), family farms, parks, pools, the beach if you have one near you...  If you're not up for outings (and you shouldn't feel you have to do too many anyway!), think about stay at home activities - there are outdoor activities, particularly if you have a yard - bubbles, baby pools, run around in the sprinkler, sidewalk chalk, scavenger hunts in the neighborhood, etc...  Or inside activities which can range from tub play, any form of arts and crafts (coloring, painting, playdough, etc), cooking/baking together, making ice cream, sitting and reading together, playing dressup and building pillow/blanket forts, etc...  Again, don't feel like you HAVE to schedule every day though.  I find some of the best moments are just when we all relax together and don't stress things. 

post #4 of 13
I hear you. I won't bother explaining all the points of similarity, but suffice it say I get where you're coming from. I have a 5yo boy who is at pre-school a couple days a week, and a 3yo girl who is with me every day. Things she thinks are special treats, but that don't take much energy on my part, are: setting up her easel and painting supplies outside, giving her a bucket of water to play with outside (or spraying her with the hose), baking cookies together, baking a cake/cupcakes and letting her decorate it/them herself with frosting and sprinkles, having a tea party in the play room, making her a pot of real peppermint tea for a real tea party, buying her a pastry from the bakery when we go grocery shopping, making popcorn for a "movie party", etc.

Another thing we're doing with her, which was inspired by something her brother's pre-school does, is keeping a portfolio of her artwork, certificates, special activities, etc. It's just a $3 plastic covered portfolio from Kmart with sheet protectors inside. When she does something she's proud of, she asks to put it in her portfolio. It's a great way to keep those bits for posterity, and it makes her feel really important. When she des something like bake or go on an outing to a zoo or has a birthday, you can take photos and then whip up a printed document taking about the special day and put that in the portfolio as well.
Edited by EA77 - 8/5/13 at 3:07am
post #5 of 13
Big hugs. Good advice here.
post #6 of 13

I could have written your post a couple of weeks ago! I have felt like such a lack-luster mama this summer. I haven't been able to do a lot of fun things with my DDs between some bad sciatic pain and being just plain exhausted all the time. Patience wears out pretty quickly too, especially with my almost 3 yo.It is totally normal. Hormones are going nuts, your body is run down and exhausted and you have every reason feel the way you do. Keep in mind that although this is the last few weeks of a family of 3 you will have so many more wonderful memories of your family of 4. And really, this is such a short time in the long run that your 3 yo probably won't even remember much of it anyway, except for maybe the excitement of a brand new sibling. If you can, get someone to give you a break I would, rest is a good thing and can help your emotions level out a bit. There are a lot of good suggestions people mentioned above too. My girls love sidewalk chalk, the kiddie pool, and painting and those require very little effort on my part. You can even get some ready-made cookie dough and bake cookies to make that even less work but still a special activity. I hope you feel better, we are almost there!

post #7 of 13

So the first thought in my head was to have her paint your belly. Do it outside and then have a bubble bath.

 

My kids have had a blast this summer being let loose in the back yard with paint (and often not even paper). Our cherry tree is now very sparkly from the glitter paint. My part is getting the paint out then sitting with my feet up, then running the bath.

 

Get some colouring sheets and spend time colouring together (it always makes me feel better to colour).

 

I have a plain muslin blanket and I need to get the fabric markers out and let Monkey and Bee decorate it for baby.

 

That said, my patience is thing too and while my two year old is being a delight, by four year old is so very much not usually right now.

post #8 of 13
I had my girls color my belly with Crayola markers. They loved doing it and it came right off.

post #9 of 13
Thread Starter 

thanks mamas! Yesterday I had energy to make zucchini bread with her and she was so happy. I have just been putting more effort into things with her, even if we are just being silly and snuggling on the couch.  I talk to her A LOT about how I am feeling and how much I love her.  This week, she is at a pre-school camp for 2 hours in the morning at our local community center.  I felt kinda guilty when I dropped her off this morning because she is somewhat shy and reserved but at the same time, it will be good for us both. 

 

LOVE all the ideas! We have the baby pool filled up already and she loves to paint so I think we will do some special outside painting.  Anything different is special :) I love the idea of her painting my belly and coloring on a blanket for her baby sister.  We take lots of baths together and that is a special time for us. I would love to think of more ideas of things she can make for her sister.

 

Thanks again for the support and ideas! Hope you all are well too!

post #10 of 13

Ooh, another idea of something to make for her sister - go by Micheals and pick up some fabric markers, stencils, and a pack of plain white bibs.  My SIL has done this for two of mine (with the family) and it's awesome.  Practical (I totally use those bibs ALL THE TIME) and memorable.  My oldest had a blast this summer making some for her baby sis. <3  You can do onesies too, but they are trickier because the markers really bleed - and don't forget to use wax paper inside the onesie to make sure it doesn't bleed through to the back.

post #11 of 13

Oh, I like that bib idea, we could even do that after the baby is here when he's bored and needs something to keep his hands busy.  I bet DS would make all sorts of Star Wars bibs for his baby sister.  ;)

post #12 of 13

Oregon, not sure if you're looking for more at-home activities or some places you can take DD for fun, but I found a website that lists a lot of fun kid activities in Portland. http://www.pdxkidscalendar.com/events-calendar/

post #13 of 13
Thread Starter 

Thanks Mamapgieon!  We have swim lessons everyday.  Today, we are going to color on bibs :) I called Michaels and they don't have plain white bibs though.  Trying to find those somewhere.

 

Hope you all are hanging in there!

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