How were you fed and has it made a difference in any way?
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Were you breastfed or formula fed?post #1 of 918/8/13 at 8:11amThread Starterpost #2 of 918/8/13 at 8:26am
I was the typical formula fed full-time daycare child. It was a sad existence really... I wasn't close with my mom until I was around 4 years old. Anyways, when she is around me and my sisters (we all breastfeed our children), she doesn't say a word. She knows that it is the most natural thing and doesn't seem uncomfortable. She just didn't want to bother with breastfeeding us. Out of us 4 sisters, she breastfed the first child and that was is it. She claimed it hurt and didn't like it.post #3 of 918/8/13 at 8:32am
I was BF for about 9 months, sister for about 3 months.... mom didn't have alot of support, so when it got tough, she stopped. My moms mom formula fed from the beginning and she gives us all a hard time if we nurse past about 3-6 months. I get the feeling she feels guilty about not nursing. My mom and MIL all support nursing up to about 18 months, then make little comments about needing to wean.... DD1 nursed to 39 months, DD2 is almost 3 and still going strong and of course, DS is 6 months and is breastfed exclusively.
Sorry you have a hard time with your mom. Hope you can work it out.post #4 of 918/8/13 at 8:46amI was formula fed. My mom says she tried in the hospital but that it hurt. Funny thing about twenty years later a dentist asked me if my mother had a hard time nursing me. Apparently I have a pretty posterior tounge tie so I'm sure I hurt her a lot! She didnt even try with my younger brother. Luckily she has been very supportive of my nursing experience. She always smiles and tells me shes proud of me when she sees me nursing. She is one of the only family members who hasn't asked me when I'm going to wean my 18 month old.post #5 of 918/8/13 at 9:00am
I have five siblings, I'm number three. Kids 1-4 were all breastfed a year. My little sister, number 5, was born at 28 weeks. My mom pumped for her the first four months but wasn't able to get her to latch. She switched to formula after that. My little brother, number 6, was breastfed the first week or so, but had to be readmitted to the hospital for jaundice. The hospital told my mother that she couldn't nurse him during that time and it messed up their nursing relationship, so he was formula fed.post #6 of 918/8/13 at 9:44am
I was a formula baby and my parents did CIO in my own room from the beginning. My mom is clearly uncomfortable with my still nursing DS, but she was kind of weird about it when he was a newborn too. I've never used a cover and when he was a newborn she would try to cover me up so that I would be "more comfortable".
I'm hoping she'll lighten up for my second baby, but I'm guessing tandem nursing will throw her for a loop.post #7 of 918/8/13 at 11:27am
I was BF as were my 3 bros. It made me adamant about breastfeeding and a bit shocked to find so many people (e.g., sisters-in-law) who don't do it (though we're not close enough that I ever discussed it with them, so have no idea why they went the formula route).
My mom is deceased and my Dad seems to feel a bit awkward when BFing comes up in conversation (we're in different cities, so the in-person stuff doesn't really apply). He said the other day: Of course you'll wean by the time he's two. I told my Dad I probably will, since my 11 month old seems to be headed in that direction anyway, but No, there's really no reason I'd 'of course' do so.
I, personally, would feel awkward BFing in public, so I always try to find a private place for it. The only time I've done it publicly (other than in front of hubby, of course) was on an airplane and I covered up with a blanket.post #8 of 918/8/13 at 12:06pmI was formula and glucose water (apparently because I was under a certain weight at birth) fed. My mother had to work full time from the beginning and the hand pump she was given at the hospital didn't really cut it. She is very pro-bf now, and doesn't mind that my 3 year old nurses, but we had a significant falling out over AP. I was raised to have immediate first time obedience through the "withdrawal of love" technique, and I do not apply that approach in my own family. We disagree over whether fear is an essential life skill and whether parents need to emotionally manipulate to be in charge. So it is a little tricky.post #9 of 918/8/13 at 2:09pmpost #10 of 918/8/13 at 2:12pmQuote:Originally Posted by Midwesterner04
I was formula and glucose water (apparently because I was under a certain weight at birth) fed. My mother had to work full time from the beginning and the hand pump she was given at the hospital didn't really cut it. She is very pro-bf now, and doesn't mind that my 3 year old nurses, but we had a significant falling out over AP. I was raised to have immediate first time obedience through the "withdrawal of love" technique, and I do not apply that approach in my own family. We disagree over whether fear is an essential life skill and whether parents need to emotionally manipulate to be in charge. So it is a little tricky.
This is how my parents and I are. They took it as a personal offense that we chose wildly different methods than they did. Most of my siblings did too, and they all have great kids. The one that didn't took my parents' methods to a new extreme and well, that's why she doesn't have her kids any more. We (my siblings and myself) were TERRIBLE kids and teenagers so I'm not sure why they're still insistent that that approach works, but pride is a big thing I guess.post #11 of 918/8/13 at 2:51pmI was formula fed. My mom nursed my older brother foe a couple of weeks, got mastitis and was told she had to wean and that was it. She's supportive of me BFing and tells me how proud she is of me all the time. I think if she had better support she probably would have nursed us both to 6-12 months at least. Regardless of BFing, we were raised in an AP friendly way. Yes we slept in cribs but no we weren't left to cry. We were raised with pretty gentle discipline too and have a pretty healthy family dynamic.post #12 of 918/8/13 at 3:31pm
Breastfed, and so was my mom, and grandmother too.They had a family practice doctor who thought formula was stupid and anti-Christian. The only baby in my extended family who had any formula was adopted and everyone tells horror stories of what it did to his digestive system. My mom worked full time from 4 months and apparently I reverse cycled when she was home and was fed bits of solids and water while she was gone. Lots of positive support.
My MIL used to say that DH was breastfed "but I always carried a bottle of formula with me" and "I stopped as soon as I was pregnant again" and "we always had a night nurse" so realistically it was about half-time, six months. Now that DH is a huge bf-supporter and we have kids who CLW, she never, ever mentions the details and just said he was breastfed of course. She is of course still obsessed when they wean and hates co-sleeping and anything AP.post #13 of 918/8/13 at 6:26pmpost #14 of 918/8/13 at 7:45pmI was breastfed till age 3, then my brother was born and my mom desperately tried to wean me but wound up reluctantly tandem nursing for a while. In retrospect, I wonder if I felt some jealousy at the time and if that contributed to the awful rivalry between my brother and me.
My parents are very pro bf, and it was just sort of expected that I would bf my kids, but we never talked about it much. I'd call them passively supportive.
My MIL did not bf DP, and she really regrets it. Her mother came to stay with her after his birth, and commented on her struggles with trying to breastfeed, saying all the women in their family have "sour milk" and that she shouldn't bother trying. Very discouraging.
Edited by Jennyanydots - 8/8/13 at 8:37pmpost #15 of 918/8/13 at 8:27pm
I was my mother's first. She tried to nurse in the hospital after a twilight birth and when she had trouble the nurses told her her nipples were all wrong and she gave up. My sister came along a few years later after an unmedicated Lamaze birth and she never even tried. Many moons later she had her last baby in an unplanned UC. Again, no attempt to put her baby to the breast. I know this, bc I was there. We were all bottle-propped and CIO'ed by 3 months.
I nursed my kids in terms of years, as did my next younger sister. The baby (the UC one) of the family nursed her first for at least a year, maybe a bit longer. I know she initiated with her second, but then she stopped speaking to me so I can only hope she kept it up a good long while and also is currently nursing her third who is not quite a year old yet. None of the three of us bottle-propped (sister #2 and I never used bottles) or ever did CIO.post #16 of 918/8/13 at 8:52pmMy Mom nursed me, not sure for how long though & she doesn't remember. I know from my baby book that she started solids really early ('70's so it was the 'norm' to start at 8 wks or earlier. She's very supportive. I'm sure she privately wonders why I don't wean 'till kindergarten but she'd never say it.
DH was but I'm pretty sure he got bottles too; she left all her kids with her parents a lot. I know for awhile she donated her milk when she worked in the maternity ward, so I guess she could have kept supply up that way. I have a pic of her nursing DH while driving in the dark ages before carseats.post #17 of 918/9/13 at 2:54am
I was breastfed for about 6 weeks. I had terrible colic and my mom was only 17. I am proud of her for doing it at all! They tried formula, goats milk and finally Nutramigen which she said was a miracle. I was a different baby! I probably was reacting to the milk proteins in her milk, but they didn't really advise about that back then...
My sis was BF for 8 months. She didn't have colic. I think our health has been similar. We both have IBS. I have allergies, she has asthma, I was a skinny kid and she was a chubby kid but that kind of switched as adults, lol. Honestly I am in the camp that most of that stuff if genetic anyway.
Subsequent bro and sis were breastfed around a month, then put on formula for fussiness.
As for me and my sister, we both have breastfed our kids around 1-2yrs, all but my last DS anyway. So it didn't impact our view of nursing. We were raising our kids in a different time and responded differently to the challenges is all.post #18 of 918/9/13 at 6:53am
I was FF, but by a mother who was very pro-BF and had planned to BF. My mother comes from a large family (11 kids) and her mother always BF! Most of my aunts have as well, and many of my cousins. But when I was born in 1980 she got bad advice about how she could not BF due to my jaundice and was pretty much heartbroken to be told that she would need to FF. I was also one of those very early solids baby, getting rice cereal under 2 weeks old when I seemed unsatisfied with formula. She BFed both of my brothers for a considerable time (I cannot recall specifics, but as they are only around 19 months apart and the oldest always refused a bottle even though my mother had an oversupply that required her to at least "catch leaks" of over 4 ounces, if not pump to relieve pressure, I think they may have even tandem nursed for a while - I know my mom at least nursed during pregnancy).
My parents have been super supportive of my own BFing.
My MIL also BFed with all three, and has been super-supportive of all of my decisions. DH and his twin brother were a planned natural birth, but she found out around 6 months that she was having twins and they were delivered only a few weeks later, so she had to have a hospital birth for the extra support. Luckily she still insisted on pumping or BFing as it was best for them! Their younger brother was a UC homebirth after seeing the midwife through pregnancy because homebirth was illegal at the time where she was living. So she was a huge advocate and a support when I wanted to birth naturally in a freestanding birth center and was there with me for delivery even though the birth center was almost two hours away. My parents had wanted to be there, but in the end it didn't really work with their schedules. =( I feel like she's been so proud of me because none of my SILs stuck with BFing for more than a few weeks or ever had interest in a natural childbirth (although I understand that at least one, with her pre-eclampsia, had some extenuating circumstances). I think MILs support and experience helped ease my father's concerns about natural childbirth (my mother was always open and supportive, and I think she probably would have been interested in having us naturally except my father's concerns always kept her from it).post #19 of 918/9/13 at 7:44am
I was breastfed, my brother was breastfed and formula fed. My mom was concerned about me feeling overwhelmed, but she also thought it was nice that I was breastfeeding. She also thought I was nuts for doing it for 3 years and kept offering me bitter herbs so I could wean my daughter, lol.
DP's mom breastfed and formula fed all four kids and told me that side-lying was a really comfortable position, and not to feel bad about crying because all babies do it.
DP's dad was such a weirdo about me breastfeeding my daughter. Like, he'd walk into the room and be all, "OH....... she's doing that." Just say it! Say nursing! Or breastfeeding! :lol:I was like, "Dude, your wife breastfed four kids were you this much of a weirdo then?" But he's weird about women in general so it wasn't a surprise.post #20 of 918/9/13 at 7:53amMy mom isn't really the type to talk much about, well anything unless you push her, but I know that I was breastfed (don't know how long). I also know that my younger brother was breastfed until my grandmother sabotaged the nursing relationship. She was apparently not at all supportive of breastfeeding, and when my mom got sick, instead of bringing her the baby to feed, grandma just gave him bottles. I don't know how old he was. I don't know if my youngest brother was breastfed at all, but since he and my mom were really sick when he was born, and since we lived with my grandmother, I doubt it.
I have no idea how my mom feels about me breastfeeding, but I guess that's a good thing, because I suppose I'd only hear about it if she disapproved. I did nurse my 1 year old in public while at the beach with her, and she didn't say anything about it. My grandma (same one) expressed horror that I was going to nurse my first baby (who was a newborn at the time) in front of my grandfather (gasp!), but he didn't care, and frankly neither did I. She's never said anything about it since then.
My MIL breastfed all of her kids, AFAIK, and she was a LLL leader in the 70s, so obviously she's very supportive. She also fought to have natural births in the 70s, and was a pioneer homeschooler in the 80s. My FIL recently posted on Facebook, in a thread about NIP, "if it bothers you, look away." He also told me recently that he's proud of me for not caring what other people (ie, my family) think about me having so many kids.
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