LOL... Are we EVER prepared when it comes to moms??? :-P
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Were you breastfed or formula fed? - Page 3post #41 of 918/12/13 at 2:29pmpost #42 of 918/12/13 at 2:35pm
haha True. Fortunately, I gave my answer and then she went right back into our BF conversation. She moved me straight from breast to cow's milk, no formula ever. I don't know for sure, but I'm pretty certain she did something similar for my younger bro and sis. I appreciate her. She also had all 3 of us naturally in a hospital when I don't think it was the "thing to do".post #43 of 918/12/13 at 2:53pm
I was breastfed for a year and my mom and I are like oil and water. She says I was difficult to get along with even as a baby. She had to hold me to keep me asleep BUT I never liked hugs or cuddles. Sounds a little contradictory but I serious don't remember ever hugging my mom. Two of my kids have sensory processing disorder and I probably did/do too. I breastfed all my kids and she had no opinion about that. She is totally freaked out by homebirth and the number of kids (6) I have.
My grandmother (had three kids), great-grandmother (had four kids) and great-great-grandmother (had 13 kids) all breastfed.
post #44 of 918/12/13 at 4:05pmpost #45 of 918/13/13 at 10:46amMy mom breastfed us both. My sister for 9-10 months (when she self weaned, probably due to too much food and cow's milk), and me for about 2 yrs, when mom decided it was time to be done.
It has definitely made a difference in the way I parent my own kids. It's normal (and kind of expected) for the women in my family to nurse. I bf my son for 27 months, and our daughter has a good start at just 3 months. Nobody on my mom's side of the family has ever questioned our choices.
I guess this has made our relationship better, at least since I've become a mom because we've got more in common now. Those years between 12 and 23 (when I married) were kinda hit and miss though.post #46 of 918/13/13 at 11:04am
I was breastfed for 6 months, and have always felt very supported by my mom. She had a little bit of a hippie streak in her I am proud of her for defying the 70s norms.
My MIL was told by the doctor that she didn't have enough cream in her breast milk to breastfeed. I still get angry at that doctor when I think about that ridiculous diagnosis.post #47 of 918/13/13 at 11:07ampost #48 of 918/13/13 at 11:13am
I was exclusively breastfed until my mom returned to work and I went to full time daycare. I was six weeks old at the time. My mom attempted to pump and/or hand-express while at work, and nurse me at home for several months thereafter, but I still ended up on a mix of cow's milk and formula by the time I was six months old. I applaud my mom for trying her best to keep the milk flowing, but full time work plus bad pumping options meant that it was inevitable that nursing would end for us. My mom was a SAHM when my older brother was a baby, so he nursed to 18 months. My mom's nursing experience came in handy when I had my first DS. She was very helpful in getting him to latch properly and made sure I understood what I was supposed to see and feel when he was nursing. She's been very supportive through all of my pregnancy and nursing experiences.post #49 of 918/13/13 at 11:39am
I was born in 1976 by a cesarean due to being breech, and breast fed for a few months and then my mom switched me to formula. I was lucky that she produced a ton of milk and didn't have any issues with nursing. She just believed what she was told and switched me to formula before the 6 month mark. Unfortunately, she didn't have an easy time with my younger sister, who was also born by cesarean and was kept at the hospital for 5 days because she was jaundiced. They had a hard time bonding and nursing, so my sister didn't receive as much mama milk as I did and was switched to formula almost immediately.
With all of that being said, neither my sister and I have ever had any allergies or digestive issues. We have both always been healthy and strong. Whatever our mama was doing while we were in utero worked out very well for us.
Our mom did the best that she knew how, and it worked out well for us.post #50 of 918/13/13 at 11:42amQuote:
Heck, I know a woman who was told this just last year! Makes me so mad! Her baby wasn't gaining and wanted to nurse too often, so the Dr told her it must be that she didnt have enough milk fat. Never mind that she put the poor kid on a 4 hour schedule almost immediately... :/ I tried to share some internet resources, but she didn't feel it was reliable info.post #51 of 918/13/13 at 11:50amQuote:Originally Posted by mandak78
Heck, I know a woman who was told this just last year! Makes me so mad! Her baby wasn't gaining and wanted to nurse too often, so the Dr told her it must be that she didnt have enough milk fat. Never mind that she put the poor kid on a 4 hour schedule almost immediately... :/ I tried to share some internet resources, but she didn't feel it was reliable info.
Gah! It's still happening. Sad.post #52 of 918/13/13 at 12:11pmpost #53 of 918/13/13 at 2:08pm
Me and my sister only nursed for about 2-3 weeks, and then my mom says her milk ran out. I believe she didn't have any support or information. I breastfed both my kids (my daughter still nurses at 19 months) and she has been very supportive, but still has a lot of wrong beliefs about breastfeeding. She still gets surprised that I have enough milk, she keeps asking me if my milk isn't "getting weak", even after I told her everything about it, even when my kids were really chubby at 4-6 months :)
In fact I think it was her belief that breastmilk isn't enough for a baby that made me so surprised when my children developed so well beeing exclusively breastfed. I was more influenced by her ideas than what I though ;)post #54 of 918/13/13 at 2:37pmpost #55 of 918/13/13 at 3:56pm
I was born in 1971 and exclusively FF, with solids introduced at 2 weeks (and yes I have digestive problems now). My mother tried BFing my oldest brother for 2 weeks and found it exhausting, and when my middle brother was born she says she took one look at him (he was 10 pounds 6 ounces) and thought "no way am I feeding this baby". I'm sure she was influenced by her family, and lacking in good professional advice too.
For a long time she was adamant that there was no real difference between BF and FF in terms of the baby's health. I never tried to argue with her about it but just always planned to BF (based on what I'd read). Luckily BFing worked out well for me and dd.
However my mother seemed uncomfortable when I nursed dd and told me that after dd was 6 months old, the milk "would just go right through her" , ie it would provide no nutritional benefit. She's come round about that since (mainly because of a newspaper article she happened to read) but she does still maintain that there's a lot of 'bullying' that goes on with regard to breastfeeding - for example, a cousin of mine was very stressed because of difficulties she was having with nursing her baby, and my mother interpreted this as being due to harassment from nurses who told her that BFing is the only option.
I sometimes feel a bit sad that we have such different takes on BF and that the basic satisfaction I get from nursing DD is something she's never experienced or understood. But as other posters have pointed out, that really ties in with to my overall relationship with her rather than just being a BF issue. She's a much more schedule-oriented person that I am generally, which probably goes some way to explain our differences wrt BF.
post #56 of 918/13/13 at 4:28pm
My mom nursed her first child for a year and a half. Her mother harassed her incessantly about "nursing the kid until she's old enough for college!" You know, same stuff some of us hear today. Mom didn't get much support at all except from my dad who believes that sort of thing is women's business. She nursed her second child for a little over a year. She nursed me less than nine months, stuffing solids into me as soon as she could. She also left us in cribs to cry and kept us in "playpens" a lot, even though she was a stay at home mom.
I don't have a good relationship with her, I can't really trust her and I attribute that to our whole lifetime together, not the early weaning. I wonder how different we would feel about each other if she had just picked me up when I was crying...
Anyways, I have weird issues with foods, particularly textural issues and I never thought much of it until a lactation consultant friend asked if I was weaned early. My mom wasn't intentionally harmful but I also know that she could have made much better choices for me, she's college educated and had plenty of experience nursing babies, no physical or mental problems, I do think she could have nursed me longer. She just decided to cut me short, no matter if it was best for me or not. I do feel some resentment for that. She does not, however, hassle me about my nursing choices.
My mother in law constantly tries to shove me into other rooms to nurse and actually becomes *jealous* (like how you would be jealous of another woman in your man's love life or something) if I nurse around her husband. It's really weird. At a church function she kept literally pushing me into a backroom when I said I needed to nurse. I went and found my husband and sat right next to him, she wouldn't dare say a thing to me near him. But I could hear her gossiping with the bishop's wife about how inappropriate I was with my sleeveless shirt and my baby-feeding ways. UGH.
It makes my mom and MIL insecure that I make very different parenting choices than them, I think they interpret it as a middle finger to them instead of just another person exercising their free will to parent how they please. It's very annoying. They also care nothing about what scientific research says on these matters, also annoying. My dad has been a surprisingly good advocate for me, my child-free sister too, she's even an intactivist lol!post #57 of 918/13/13 at 6:36pmpost #58 of 918/13/13 at 8:30pm
I was formula fed. I do have some autoimmune issues, but who knows if that's related. Some of it runs in my dad's side of the family. I'm the youngest and am 6.5 yrs younger than my nearest sibling. My mom told me that she asked the doctor if it would be okay if she didn't nurse me because she didn't feel up to it. This was in 1964. (I'm old!) My older sibs were breastfed some although I don't know how much.
My mom used to talk about how her mom (my grandmother) followed the norm of her day and only fed her babies on a schedule (4 hrs I think) and couldn't stand to hear them cry when it wasn't time for them to nurse, but she stuck to the schedule anyway because that's how you did things back then . Sidenote: my mom was older when she had me so for my grandmother this was way back in the 20s and teens. My mom is 87 now and she was the youngest of 3.
I breastfeed my oldest until she was almost 6. She just really needed it. It wasn't my intention to go that long, but she is a very highly-sensitive, high-needs, tender-hearted, anxious soul. My younger dd nursed until she was just about 4 and it was pretty infrequent at the end there.
My mom was generally supportive of my early nursing and we just didn't do it in front of her when the kids were older. I tandemed, too, and don't recall putting that on display for many people, either.
Edited by beanma - 8/13/13 at 9:13pmpost #59 of 918/13/13 at 9:00pm
I apparently weaned myself at 6 months although Mom would have preferred I go for a year. She herself was bottle fed as seemed to be a common trend for baby boomers (she said the hippies brought it back in the 60's!) It turned out my first daughter did the same as me- I struggled to get her to 7 months. I pushed and pushed but she just wasn't terribly into it. I'm pregnant now and curious to see if this one any different, as I again hope to get to a year. My MIL was president of her chapter of Nursing Mothers of Australia and breastfed my husband and his sisters for at least a year each. If I ever told her I planned to opt out of nursing for no reason she would probably 'divorce' me :)post #60 of 918/13/13 at 9:58pm
My Mom told me that she breastfed me for a couple of months but then, she couldn't. She didn't really offer any explanantion as to why, sort of said that maybe her milk dried up or something...I was put on regular formula and then soy formula because I was allergic to the regular formula.
When I was six my Mom had a baby and again, when I was ten, and I never remember her breastfeeding either of my siblings.
When I was ten, my Dad remarried and when my Stepmom had their first baby, she breastfed and, she breastfed the other two children they had together. She breastfed them without a boppy and without a cover but, I don't think she breastfed them past a year and I never remember her breastfeeding in public.
My Mother was strangely, almost off-puttingly, curious when I breastfed my Son. My Stepmom was and has always been supportive and it's thanks to my Stepmom that I even knew breastfeeding was possible and normal.
My Mom grew up without her Mother and she fell in love with a man suffering from addiction and mental disorders and suffered abuse. My Mom tried to be warm and loving but, I don't remember her being physically affectionate or warm when I was a child. There was a lot of self-imposed distance from both of our sides.
My experience from both women, helped me breastfeed and keep going. From my Stepmom, I learned breastfeeding was normal and possible. From my Mom? Breastfeeding was a curiousity but also? A way to be strongly connected to your child. My Mother's lack of experience outlined how important it was for me to breastfeed my own child.
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