or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Childhood and Beyond › Education › Learning at School › Sex education: Should it be taught in schools?
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Sex education: Should it be taught in schools? - Page 6

post #101 of 115
Thread Starter 
I don't think any prescription medication should be advertised, but I don't think there should be different rules for contraceptives than other medications.

When I was in school - ages ago - we learned about birth control in more general terms. Like, we learned about birth control pills - that they existed - but no brand names and no discussion really about either potential benefits outside contraception either. We did hear that there are health concerns and you should talk to your health provider about them but we didn't learn specifics. I'd like to see that. I want kids to know what is available, but I want them to know that they're only available by prescription for a reason and they need to discuss them with a doctor if they think that a potential choice for them.
post #102 of 115

moominmamma, dinahx hey. I'm not a GP and I'm not saying it doesn't happen that people will ask for a particular drug. I'm sure that people must have personal preference some times. My point really is that I'd guess it to be uncommon, partly because we don't have access to information about different types of drugs (I mean, unless we research it specially), but more than that, because of the culture. Its just not something that really exists in a non-medical persons psyche, The assumption-certainly in idle conversation- is that a doctor is generally better placed to make the decision than us. I have to be honest though, I don't think UK doctors expect to be challenged at all and its not a particularly nice thing to be a patient questioning your treatment, even in the most non-confrontational way. And I can see how this works and I can see how it doesn't.


Ack, I really do not want to be NHS bashing. I think it gives a great service to the greatest number and I think to do that certain things have to happen. We are not the American system. In the UK, if a homeless teenager comes in with heart failure and a rich guy comes in with a splinter, the homeless kid is seen first.  I'd take a system like that over one who offers lots of choice to those who can pay any day.


But the other side to that is we do lack choice. We lack time to make the choices.  There really is not an expectation that we will make any choices at all, not at GP level and certainly not once we get to hospital. Our doctors do make a lot of choices for us in practice, I feel, mainly by predeciding the extent of our choices. I have to say, personally I'm pretty comfortable with that. I approach medical care on the assumption that doctors do basically know their stuff and are able to make a good decision for me. Yeah I'd like more time at doctors appointments to explore options, but thats partly a political funding issue. I d think that not having direct pharmaceutical marketing to patients is basically a good thing, especially as its not like the information isn't out there on unbiased websites like Cochrane.


To get to the point in the UK where you went in and asked for a certain pill would I think for most people, be fairly nerve wracking and require a breakdown of taboos. Of course this will bother some people more than others.


There's a flip side to this that I do want to mention, in further defence of the NHS, which is that services where talking and choice are seen as especially important do usually operate so as to give some talking space. Maternity services, well women clincs/Brook (contraception). Oncology departments have specialist nurses to talk with patient and certainly round here assign a nurse-caseworker, even if you never see them. 


So in conclusion to my accidental essay,  I think our system works for the majority. I think the US system works for the minority who can pay. And, yk, if you really want a particular brand of something, there's nothing stopping you from going private. 


ETA mamazee that is the UK system as I understand it and that's what I am saying is better than the US system if that allows direct, scaremongering advertising to kids.

post #103 of 115
It doesn't usually go that WELL in the US to challenge a doctor, but we are technically allowed to.

Most clinics, especially state clinics, do have a BCP preference. And certainly women decide if the want Mirena vs. Paragard.

I guess in the US, doctors/clinics are more open to honoring contraceptive requests than ones for, say controlled substances or a specific GI or Obstetric drug.
post #104 of 115
Well, I currently prescribe contraceptives, and I work for a private practice. I know the providers at my local planned parenthood and several of the volunteers. For all of us, the concerns are effectiveness of the method, and that it's appropriate for the client. The latter includes cost. So I'm actually less likely to prescribe anything that has a commercial going because that means it's not generic. The vast majority of what gets prescribed is generic- not big money. That goes for diaphragm and cervical caps, too.
post #105 of 115

I'm now trying to recall my own sex ed from 15 years ago.  The way I remember it, it was a pretty all-encompassing program that I think I liked:  we learned about contraceptive options, all sorts, from abstinence to the pill to condoms, etc.  A big part of it was psychological and moral, which I know not everyone likes, but I think it was smart to address the mental and emotional aspects of sex.  There was no brand-naming that I can remember.

post #106 of 115

I am a physician and see the consequences of lack of sex ed in my practice.  It is amazing what people don't know.  I think we need better sex ed in schools (though I wish there would be more emphasis on fertility awareness, not necessarily as a birth control technique, but as a way of learning about health and what is normal. 


That being said, I am Catholic and remember back to my 9th grade (very comprehensive) sex ed class and being incredibly offended.  I was not bothered by the graphic STD slide show, the graphic and candid discussions about sex positions, oral/anal sex etc.  What still to this day infuriates me is that when the teacher had a session of practice putting a condom on a banana, I didn't want to participate.  When she asked, I explained to her that I was not planning to have sex until I was married, and that I didn't think I needed practice at age 14 with condoms.  She looked right at me, laughed, and said "no one waits till they are married to have sex."


If we are going to include sex ed in schools, we need to make sure that the instructors show respect for the students and their belief systems. 

post #107 of 115
More generally, I think the idea of sex ed is great. Thinking back to my own sex ed, though, it was very fear-based----"Have sex ONCE even WITH a condom and you will probably GET AIDS AND DIE!!!!!!" was the message I remember receiving. Not really helpful! I pretty much taught myself about sex and safer sex by reading "Our Bodies, Ourselves." Happily that's not so bad a source. ;-)

In my ideal world, sex ed might be taught by a bio teacher or by the school nurse. It'd include lots of information on safer sex, including abstinence, NFP/FAM, monogamy, barrier methods, implantable devices, and pharmaceuticals (and anything else I've missed), but it wouldn't engage in shaming. I'd like some sex-positivity, please! I'd love any child of mine to be able to enjoy his/her sexuality without fear, or with only the minimum of fear required by something so inherently emotional and risky.

I especially don't want a sex ed that shames "alternative" practices (quotes very much skeptical), like fisting, anal sex, etc. I really loved what a poster above said about the LGBTQ kids. Why should their sexuality be some dark shameful secret, while penis-in-vagina sex is spoken of openly? Not OK.

I came from the link on the main page this morning, too! My kiddo is in utero and so a long way from school age (though s/he will go to school) but this topic is near and dear to my heart.
post #108 of 115

pepperedmoth, I saw your last night. Please let me address it. Do not report a post and then post to the thread yourself, quoting what you deem offensive. I have asked for an edit to clarify intent so let's wait for that. If you have any concerns you can PM me to discuss. 

post #109 of 115
Thanks! Wasn't sure the best way to go about it. Don't usually report things; usually just argue. ;-)
post #110 of 115

Just to say, I've certainly reported things and then argued. (well, once I reported something), Obviously you guys have a lot on your plate and it was important to me that it was dealt with, but also important that the person who said what they said understood that it wasn't on, and that a mood was created where people felt able to say it wasn't on. I had/have no idea what the protocol is, but it is tricky if we feel some action needs to be taken quickly. Apologies but I do find the site hard to navigate. Is there a central place where such ettiquette is laid out for us?

post #111 of 115

Our Forum Basics tutorial explains the how-to's of reporting 


 At the bottom of each post there is the Report Post button (the flag) which will allow you to send a report to the moderator or admin in the case of an inappropriate post.  We rely on our members to report things they see that violate the User Agreement or Forum Guidelines, as it helps us to keep the community welcoming to all our members.


The purpose of reporting a post is so that when you see something you feel to be offensive it can be looked at by a moderator and handled in the thread by the mod or privately rather than members attempting to deal with it and the whole discussion become a train wreck of accusation and argument.  I know members DO call BS on stuff and argue it out right in the thread. Sometimes it works out well but often it doesn't. 


I haven't yet heard back from the member so I removed her post until she does reply. But keep in mind that it's pointless for us to remove a post  when members quote the very post that offends them. If it offends you do you really want to repost it? It makes our work more tedious because we have to go through and remove the quotes. If you find it necessary to refer to what you think is offensive you can always place a link to the post. But even better - let us handle it. :thumb

post #112 of 115

oh sure, I know how to report a thread and i'm familiar with the forum basics. I just don't know what to do next. I think i've also been guilty of copying and pasting a text I've complained about, because you just kind of do, yk? Had never thought of it in that light.But reposting offensive stuff can be helpful for clarity. Other forums I'm on would tend to remove all the threads. 


I'm just saying really that, based on this thread, peppermoth seems to have made an entirely reasonable mistake that any of us could have made, because I don't think most of us would have known there was a rule about that. And different fora do have different policies here so while I'm sure the Mothering one makes good sense to you guys, its not intuitive to me.

post #113 of 115

Sex education is a very relevant topic that should be taught in schools. With what is going today, a lot of teenagers get pregnant because they engage in something uncautiously. It is about time for these kids to know more about sex to guide them and to let them know about the consequences they might encounter when engaging in sex.

post #114 of 115

This is a great thread! I'm searching out all the Mothering site threads related to teaching kids about sex and sexuality and the discourse is really great. 


I think its important to remember that every jurisdiction in the US and Canada is different in terms of what and when sex education curriculum is expected to be taught.   Regardless, I'm a big believer in comprehensive sex education in schools and at home.  Teachers should teach science which includes physiology, reproduction, puberty, and so much more.  They should also teach about healthy relationships and respectful communication - these are anti-bullying and consent lessons. It isn't a teachers responsibility (nor should it be) to teach values around sex (ie. the right time to become sexually intimate, sex outside of marriage, etc).


Kids don't just want the facts but want tools for grappling with those facts.  Parents must share their values around sex and sexuality. We need to do so in a way that is dynamic and respectful of the fact that our kids are formulating their own values and ideas about the world, and we need to reinforce that every person is entitled to sound information about the topic.   My hope is that we raise people who feel less sexual shame than our generation and the generations before us.  


Schools have a role to play.  Parents have a role to play.  We can't keep leaving it up to mass media.


I started a blog on raising sexually intelligent kids.  I'd be honoured if the Mothering community had a look.  www.sexplainer.com

post #115 of 115
Originally Posted by dinahx View Post

I have a serious issue with SexEd being turned into a Pharmaception & PP sales pitch. Just like AF education in schools is 'sponsored by Tampax'. Do y'all see that is *just* as offensive as any religious POV?

It is corporate & it is anti-feminist as women are encouraged to bear the risk burden by taking hormones, placing devices, getting shots, etc.

I went to Catholic school & was taught NFP in Senior Year religion class. That knowledge, about my body & my cycle has served me WAY better than a sales pitch for synthetic estrogen would have! As far as STDs go: I learned about those in Biology.

I believe that Sex Ed as conceived by PP & pals actively limits women's choices & stunts their own understanding of their bodies.

I am all for STD education, I am all for CONDOM education. I am not a fan of education on perversions & way out practices that can damage the body tho . . .


This!!! I'm not by any means against birth control as a whole but as someone who has had adverse reactions to multiple types of birth control it isn't something I'm rushing out to shove into my daughters' bodies anymore than I want them popping Tylenol every other day or standing in line for a flu shot every season. I do think sex ed is something that should be taught at home and I wouldn't want my children being taught at school without my knowledge and understanding of the program first mostly without me having a chance to teach them myself first at an appropriate age. That said I have no objection to my kids getting sex ed from school as well as at home. The discussion about the 'out there' sexual practices and LGBT I can see there being hang ups over and I can't say I'm thrilled about my kids learning those things but I know they will so I'd rather they get that information from me or a teacher than their buddies (who probably heard it from a misinformed older sibling to begin with) or google. I honestly believe that if a child is given all the information and open dialogue and taught to think for themselves and make their own decisions they will often make good ones.

New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: Learning at School
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Childhood and Beyond › Education › Learning at School › Sex education: Should it be taught in schools?