Hello dear sweet Mamas,
It may not be necessary to say this, but please don't judge me on what I'm about to share with asking for your help. I'm not at liberty to go into details, but the sleep schedule of my husband, our toddler, and me is not healthy and we're worried about the near future and we desperately want to change it. I don't know if there is a standard schedule most new parents follow for bedtime, but I've heard and read online that most young children go to sleep before 9pm. I remember when I was a child and I would go to sleep before 10pm, of course depending on how I felt, what my now deceased Mother was going thru, outside noises, etc. Unfortunately, due to circumstances beyond our control, including abusive obnoxious sub-culture noise mongers, my husband and I were forced into an unhealthy sleep schedule and were often kept up late at night or we'd go to sleep at 11pm and our sleep would be rudely disrupted and interrupted so we've suffered a great deal of sleep deprivation.
Now, we're near parents of a now 17 month old adorable wonderful little boy and he's having sleep difficulties too. His teething causes him a great deal of pain, which we're doing our best to help him with using natural holistic modalities, including Hyland's teething gel and tablets and Ayurveda and herbs, and the teething makes him very irritable and moody and he fights going to sleep, even though you can see in his eyes that he's very tired and needs rest. We give him his bottle with his non-dairy milk and some drops of chamomile tea, which he needs and likes and it soothes him, but we often have to give him 2 or 3 to do the trick. We often take turns rocking him, singing him lullabies, and caressing his head, his cheeks, his back, his belly, and we whisper "sweet nothings" to him to comfort and soothe him. Some nights are harder than others and unfortunately our sleep schedule is very erratic. He's been known to fall asleep at 11 and sleep until 1 and then wake up screaming and crying and we read to him and do everything we can to soothe him back to sleep, and he sleeps, but it's been known to take a few hours and then he wakes up in the morning screaming and crying and again, you can see in his eyes that he's very tired and we have to give him yet another bottle or 2 with more chamomile tea and after 30 minutes or so of tireless effort, he goes back to sleep and we're exhausted and thankfully, Mommy and Daddy are able to catch up on sleep for a few more hours. Sadly, we haven't been early morning folks in years, but we do miss them and we'd love to get back to them. Before our sleep was disrupted and turned upside down by the creeps, when we were in L.A., we'd go to sleep before 10pm and wake up before 8am, and it felt wonderful, but sadly, this is not the case now and it's very stressful for us. :( We are non caffeinated coffee drinkers and we believe that rest is very important.
We endure this every night and my dear husband cuddles me to soothe and comfort me because this frustrating pattern with our baby is stressing me out to tears and I can't stand it! I hope and pray it's temporary and this too shall pass, but it feels like an eternity and I am having a very difficult time coping with it and while there are wonderful gentle kind caring Mommies out there who I'm sure will sympathize, I'm always concerned that other Mommies will judge us, but I hope I'm just being a worrywort. His crying and screaming is very difficult and exhausting and it's like scratching a chalkboard. We love our little boy very much with all our heart and he means the world to us and it pains us to have to suffer thru this. We're going to do our best starting tonight of establishing a healthy routine with lights and computers and tv off at 11pm and soothe and comfort him and help him sleep, but unfortunately, it probably won't happen immediately and we're not very patient and we're worried about how long it will take to correct this and improve it. Please help, thank you for listening.