A lot is going on, including me being unemployed for about 3 months and, well, I worry.
I worry myself to the point of freezing.
I am doing meditation and breathing and going for walks which all helps. Affirmations too
During the week when my son goes to school in the mornings I do well
But when I am with my son over my weekend, it is tough. I am doing some computer work and I have gotten other gigs for money. He hates if I am at the computer or at the phone. He misbehaves in search of negative attention, even if he agreed to let me work on the computer for 20 minutes, he is 5.
He sleeps very little, from 10pm to 7 am, so not much time for me to work "while he sleeps". By 10 pm I am destroyed and I work maybe 2 hours after that.
So I worry some more, and I feel any adversity is a frigging mountain.
I should know better, all works out in the end, it really does.
But during those weekends I have a big knot in my tummy, so even when I am playing with him I'm not fully present.
We do one outing a day during which we have a lot of fun. it is the time spent at home which is hard.
Now is a three day weekend, Saturday we did well, today, I have some struggles with the computer job I am doing and I am flustered and I am affecting him and our time together.
Today I have been so not myself that I managed to skip lunch! just like that, we didnt have lunch.....??!!
Tomorrow we are going out for sure a good chunk of the day, Ill have to cram work for Tuesday.
Any words of compassionate wisdom would be appreciated.