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Weekly chat September 2-8 - Page 5

post #81 of 108
Serena, I hope you can figure out something. Having your DB take the baby sounds awful greensad.gif

Cmu, congrats!!!!

I'm so tired of being pregnant. I think I already wrote that my OB said he's fully engaged- the bladder pressure is almost unbearable. If that didn't make walking uncomfortable enough, I've got adhesions and nerve damage from a laparotomy scar that are starting to flare up. It hurts whenever I use or put weight on my left leg.

And to add insult to injury, I asked DP to take a few pictures of me today, because I thought I was looking good-and I looked awful greensad.gif I have had very few pics taken of myself during this pregnancy, except the selfies I've taken for the belly shots thread. When I didn't love the pictures, DP got irritated and said that's why he never takes pictures of me- cause I never like them anyway. I told him he needs to take more than 3, and spend some time helping me get a decent shot- it's nearly impossible when he's acting put out and impatient. I can't ask him to retake if I look slouchy, or whatever... Anyway, so much for thinking I looked good today greensad.gif
post #82 of 108

Just checking in to say hi to everyone! Congrats to Aidenn and good luck to all you mamas who are starting to feel something! :)


I woke up this morning with period-like cramping and I have been monitoring all day. They are about 20 minutes apart on average and sometimes 10 or 15 minutes. So I am just keeping an eye on things. Midwife said to call her again when they are consistently 15 minutes apart or if my water breaks.


Trying not to get too excited since I know this is just a preview and may not last. I think I also might be in a bit of denial. But I really don't know what to expect, so I keep thinking I am imagining it all. LOL. Very weird state of being right now.

post #83 of 108

cmu - BIG CONGRATULATIONS!!!  I also can't wait to see pics and hear the story.  Hope your recovery from birth goes well and you are having fun falling in love with your little one!


serena - Oh, having DB take the baby with him just sounds awful.  I hope you can figure something out immigration-wise, and if not that you can find some kind of childcare support so you aren't so far from your baby.  I totally hear you on how frustrating it is to deal with awful immigration systems that are constantly breaking families apart.  That being said, I know my DH and I are actually in an extremely good situation compared to many other families dealing with the U.S. immigration system, even with all the headaches it is causing for us.


Serafina  - Right on for you!!  That sounds like that just-before-labor burst of energy that I hear so many moms talk about.


Jennyanydots  - I hope your baby comes soon so that you aren't so uncomfortable anymore.  I have to say, with the partners taking unflattering photos issue, it doesn't always help to just have them take a bunch.  My DH will take 20 pics, but he won't let me see the first few to advise him on angles... so I just end up with 20 unflattering photos.


AFM: I posted this on FB, but for anyone who isn't on FB: I woke up with gas pains this morning and for a minute thought, Is this it?  When I realized it wasn't, I then thought, Well, this could have been it so I better make my bead exchange necklace STAT.  Here's the final result:

post #84 of 108

cmu - CONGRATS!!!!  Birth twin!!!!

post #85 of 108

cmu - congratulations!


serena - wow, that sounds like a bad situation with DB's immigration stuff. Personally, I would not be okay with being away with my baby that soon - can´t your mother hekp take care of the baby? I also would be very wary of DB wanting to take the baby out of your country - I'm sure he's a wonderful man and everything, but if he does not have the legal means as of that moment to come back to the UK, what makes you think he would just to return his child? Sounds like if things don't go well he might potentially be holding your baby hostage so that you will marry him and solve his immigration issues.


I'm sorry if I'm stepping into stuff that's none of my business, and I'll shut up now, but please be very very careful about this.

post #86 of 108

lilmamita: beautiful work! I just picked up my supplies today and will probably make my necklace tomorrow!


serena: I hate to say it but I agree with chispita, it sounds like a potentially messy situation if your DB takes the baby with him.


jenny, sorry you're feeling miserable. Do you have someone else who can take pictures? I find it's often hard to get a relative to do anything you really care about your way because it turns into some sort of weird power struggle.


I had a super productive day today and it's only Saturday! We usually spread out our to do list and errands over both days but I got so much done I'll have all day tomorrow to get "extra" stuff crossed off the list! More freezer meals to be made and miscellaneous last minute supplies to be bought.

Seeing all these birth announcements is exciting but at the same time I find it inconceivable to think that I will soon have a baby of my own. I'm still very much removed from the reality that there will be a kid in the picture before the end of the month! Probably in denial about going into labor too...

post #87 of 108
Lilmamita, that necklace is lovely.

I think I'm gonna try and talk my mum in to staying with me if he has to go home so she can look after baby. But I'm not gonna think about it for a while, I need to stop stressing. I'm getting a bit sick and my anxiety is going crazy coz of the section on tues. that's enough stress for now! Lol
post #88 of 108

So sorry about all your problems, Serena.  I have to say I would choose the more reliable support person for the surgery.  As well as the more settled and predictable choice for looking after the baby if your boyfriend needs to go to Kenya.  Moms are really great like that!  

post #89 of 108

Lilmamita, the necklace is indeed stunning.


Thistlemoon, fingers crossed that this is it!


Jenny - sorry about the picture fiasco.  I was debating asking my partner to take photos of me, and now I'm feeling even more skeptical that it would turn out well.


I had a surprise baby shower today.  I am so loving my best friend for doing it for me!  I didn't think I'd have one.  It was a short and simple affair at my favorite restaurant but plenty enough for me.

post #90 of 108
Yeah Serena-- no stressing! You need to focus on yourself and not the other issues going on. I'm going to have to kick my DHs ass just to get him to call a lawyer. Like I don't have enough going on! He's being great though with DD1 and is doing all the cooking/cleaning plus helping me get enough rest so I'm not complaining... much.

For what it's worth my DH is very squeamish and almost passed out AGAIN when I was getting my IV put in. The stupid nurse botched it and got blood all over. I think your DB will be fine and personally would rather have daddy there then my parents or anyone else. But that's me. Do not worry about immigration now as you have a few months right? I was even thinking that they have to allow your DB to stay to care for his child who was born in the UK right? This is how it goes for the US at least. I think?

Thistle-- do you have your delicious babe in arms yet?!?! I'm excited!

We are just chillin with babe and trying to get naps in. This stupid heat wave has caused us to stay indoors. Too freaked out to bring a week old out in 90-100 degree weather with a VERY high UV index.

DD1 is going stir crazy. I'm mourning our nursing relationship a bit. She doesn't like my milk apparently and was so used to my dried-up pregnant boobs she finds my new large leaky ones weird I think. It's not like the milk wouldn't help her-- she's currently the pickiest she's ever been and I'm wondering how she survives with the tiny amount of food she eats! So now she doesn't want me to put her to sleep with nursing anymore. I realized that this is the only time I nurse her so technically she's weaned on her own. I never thought I'd be sad about it but I am. I really dreaded tandem nursing and now that I'm not doing it I'm sad?!?! Oh these hormones are driving me bonkers...
post #91 of 108

I don't know about the UK, but, unfortunately, the US immigration system doesn't have have any provisions for allowing undocumented immigrant parents to stay to care for their newborns who were born in the US, not even for mothers.  Plenty of the immigration prisons in the US house mothers with their newborns, awaiting deportation.

post #92 of 108
Originally Posted by lilmamita View Post

I don't know about the UK, but, unfortunately, the US immigration system doesn't have have any provisions for allowing undocumented immigrant parents to stay to care for their newborns who were born in the US, not even for mothers.  Plenty of the immigration prisons in the US house mothers with their newborns, awaiting deportation.

Really? Wonder where I got that info...
post #93 of 108
Thanks everyone for your comments on my work / leave situation. I did end up checking out the FMLA laws, and it looks like they've got their asses covered. I would have to have worked there for at least 12 mos. to be eligible for maternity leave and since I've only worked there for 6 mos., I'll have to go with their disability leave. Of course they're still idiots not knowing and constantly confusing their own policy, which has added to my stress levels etc, but the bottom line is that it's all legal.

Serena, it sounds like a difficult situation. I really hope your mom can help out with the baby. I once had a roommate who left her 6 month old daughter at home with her boyfriend overseas to do a scientific practicum for half a year. It was breaking my heart to see her skype with her bf and baby everyday.. But she thought it was necessary for career reasons to do this. I just hope you can find some way around this.. But don't stress out too much about this now.. You'll figure it out.

Tilly - yeah I think lilmamita is right on US immigration. I heard before DHS was established apparently there was a time when immigrants automatically became American citizens or at least permanent residents if they gave birth to their baby within the US, so maybe that's what you've heard. It's no longer in effect though.

37 weeks now, very uncomfortable every day. Taking it one day at a time again, just like in the first trimester with the nausea. I have only 20 more days to go.

The good news is that we are pretty much done with our weekend project of converting the office to a guest bedroom. Also, DF has started freezing meals today smile.gif we have 2 days worth of food in our freezer now and knowing him, he's gonna go overboard on this now every time he cooks, which is great actually. :P

Oh and I think we are closing in on the name for the baby.. Currently having two final (?) contenders for the first middle name, which is good enough for me. We might just wait till we meet the baby and then decide which one fits him better.
post #94 of 108
Yeah DBs not automatically allowed to stay because of the baby. We have to jump through hoops first! Although if he does get refused we can appeal that it's against his human rights to b separated from his child but that is more money and time.
post #95 of 108
Well Serena, unless someone goes into labor, you're next to welcome baby!!! smile.gif

I'm so excited for you. My sister was sick throughout her pregnancies like you, and as soon as she had them, it all went away. So as much as I can't wait to see pics of your baby girl, it makes me glad to know that you'll also be feeling a lot better soon, because I know you've felt crummy for so long.

I hope you're having a relaxing, restful day. Good luck tomorrow!! smile.gif
post #96 of 108

What Thefreckledmama said!

post #97 of 108
Thx freckle and nettle. I'm counting down the hours now lol. I'll b a mummy by this time tomorrow 😃
post #98 of 108

How exciting, Serena!! Best of luck tomorrow!! (And hopefully all that other stuff will come together in time over the next couple of months before crunch time. Fingers crossed for you!)

post #99 of 108

Good luck Serena!!  I'll definitely be thinking about you tomorrow and sending lots of good vibes your way.

post #100 of 108
Thread Starter 
Best wishes for your birth serena!

AFM, I was up from 11:30pm-3am with fairly regular cramping that was too uncomfortable to sleep but not enough to call anyone about. It drifted away after I had a bunch to drink, a snack and watched junky TV on Hulu. But today was DS's first day of preschool and I had a lactation client booked so I'm glad I didn't go into labor last night! Tonight? Well, that would be fine. smile.gif 4 friends have checked in today, saying they were flashing on me having the baby. Interesting. Now for a nap, hopefully.
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